Anonymous wrote:thanks everyone. i can ask to telework, but I don't think it will go over well Daycare near my work is an option, altho I love the one near my house. I cant reduce my hours b/c then they will want to pay me less money! thanks everyone

Sometimes less money in order for your child to not be in daycare for 12 hours a day (and so you have some time with them) is a acrifice you have to make as part of being a parent. If your primarly priority is making money then why does it matter how many hours he's in daycare?

When I was in grad school, several of my friends were part-time nannies: they would pick up the kids from daycare, take them home, play a little/prep dinner, that kind of thing. It was the perfect job for a student. Have you looked into something like that?

Can you go down to 80% (and leave 1.5 hours early each day)? I did and it is worth the financial loss.

Start working part time. It is tough at first, but you adjust.

Anonymous wrote:If your jobs are not flexible, I would consider moving closer to your jobs, or finding new ones. Yes, you could have daycare closer to your work, but even if your baby commutes well, a toddler probably won't.

Problem is that I work in Dulles and DH works in DC, so we bought a house in the middle near vienna metro. My commute is about 50 minutes and DH's is about 1 hour and 15 minutes!!

thanks everyone. i can ask to telework, but I don't think it will go over well Daycare near my work is an option, altho I love the one near my house. I cant reduce my hours b/c then they will want to pay me less money! thanks everyone

If your jobs are not flexible, I would consider moving closer to your jobs, or finding new ones. Yes, you could have daycare closer to your work, but even if your baby commutes well, a toddler probably won't.

The only solutions are to find a daycare closer to work or change your hours, sorry. For what it's worth, you're certainly not alone -- we do send ours to daycare 11 hours. As a young infant, we actually didn't feel like it made a huge difference and he fit in three full naps a day at daycare; if we'd been able to give him a shorter day at daycare, he would've just been taking an extra nap a day or likely would've had the third nap cut into or dropped earlier.

A nanny who is willing to work 11 hours a day will be expensive. Is there childcare near one of your work locations? That way, you can be with DS in the car at least? Not a perfect solution, I know.

If it's any consolation, when my first child was born both DH and I had very, very inflexible jobs (military). There were days when my little one was the first one at daycare (at 6 am - and I was RUNNING to work to get there on time) and the last one there to be picked up (at 6 pm). I felt miserable about it but just did the best I could. On weekends, we all hunkered down and stayed in as a family (or did family activities as DS got older). Eventually, our schedules got better. Needless to say, DS is a great kid. He doesn't seem to be affected by all of those hours in daycare and obviously doesn't remember any of it!

The toughest part was making sure I didn't keep him up too late at night, considering he had to be up so early the next morning. It was tough but we did it. He's such a great little guy now -- almost 10 years old and just the best (smart too!). Good luck OP. Do what you need to do and stay steadfast.

Daycare near one of your offices will cut 90 minutes off of that.

Is there daycare near one of your jobs? although your young child will have more car time, it will be with one of you.

Can you find a daycare near your workplace? That way, baby can be with you on commute.
Or can you reduce your work schedule to 7 hours a day, or 32 hours a week?

Can one of you telecommute, even part time?

I agree that is way to long. My DS is in daycare for 9.5 hours some days and I think that is too long. We stagger our schedules (DH drops off and I pick up). One of you is just going to have to get a more flexible schedule or get a nanny. However, having a nanny still means you'll be away from your child for 11 hours a day...

My hours and DH's hours are 8 to 5, and we both have about an hour commute. How do we work it so our 3 month old does not have to be in daycare from 7 to 6 everyday? I think thats too long for a young child. DH's job is not flexible on the hours. Mine MIGHT be--- and if they are, it's only by 1/2 hour or so. Any advice? Do most people in this situation just hire a nanny?