You are not alone. Mine never travels but I would love it if he did.

No! I don't like solo parenting.

Lucky for us, he's a total homebody, completely comfortable keeping house and kids on his own, and does not have to travel for his job. I have an average of 3 work trips a year... two are less than a week (U.S. HQ), and one is 3+ weeks (int'l HQ and/or other field office). When I was job-hunting, I only looked at positions with a travel requirement. Love me some away-time.

Only about as often as I wish for a kick in the face.

Pre-kid it was nice to have some solo time, work late, watch bad TV without hearing snark, eat PB&J for dinner, etc, but post-kid I dread DH's trips. Possibly because DH is the equal-partner sort, so having to do all of the household chores is definitely not what I'm used to.

Anonymous wrote:If you're a SAHM, it's great b/c there is only YOU telling the kids what to do and they don't have the additional distraction of another person.

If you are working, it totally SUCKS to have a travelling spouse b/c it is very hard to do the drop offs and pick up and commute and work. It just takes too long and the kids can't be in care centers from the opening bell to the closing bell.

agree

When you work, it's a whole different ballgame.

I'm the OP of the other thread. While I agree with your points they're not worth to me the things we miss when DH is gone

Mine travels a lot and it's awesome!! Sure I miss him but it's so easy to love him and miss him when the daily annoyances don't exist because he's not here! I think his frequent travel for work has made the time we actually spend together at home 50% happier. I get to look forward to him coming home from a trip rather than dreading the moment he walks in the door like some women do. Sometimes it is really inconvenient, and too much travel in a short time period is hard, but overall, I think it's a huge boon to our marriage.

I think as long as there is trust and no one suspects the other of cheating, frequent travel is a benefit to the relationship. What's the common complaint about relationships as they age? Getting bored with each other. Day in and day out of the same. Anyone who spends that much time with a person gets sick of the other, in a marriage or not.

So I think frequent trips are a benefit. It gives each other a break and a chance to do whatever they want. It also gives each person the chance to miss the other person and realize how much you need and love them. I've been in situations where we've been apart for two weeks and seeing the other person in the airport for that first time was straight out of a movie. Nothing existed except for the two of us in that moment.

second the house being cleaner.

Laughed out loud at the title of this thread.

Sure, it's normal. I'm a WOHM and sometimes my mom comes when he travels so it is an added bonus - no daycare dash and come home to a home-cooked meal I didn't make, and clean laundry I didn't do.

But yes, sometimes it's nice to have your own space.

I lose weight when he's gone! And I write more. And I watch whatever I want to on tv. I can play NPR on the radio as often and as loud as I want. I miss him a lot but at the same time I enjoy the space.

You are not alone. I love my husband. I really do. Before kids, when the Terp (football) team was good (he's alumni), he used to go to whatever bowl game they got invited to for 3-4 days. I used to love it. I'd look forward to it like a min-vacation for myself. Of course I would put on an act like I was gonna miss him more than life itself. But...as soon as he left it was PARTAY TIME. I could give myself long beauty treatments, watch terrible movies, eat popcorn/ice cream for dinner. I could also eat in bed and keep the tv on all night without the endless bitching.
Now we've got kids he never goes anywhere. The closest I get is he has Terp tickets and during the season he goes to their games so I might get half a Saturday to myself. I love the fall, the February through August timeframe is tough cause he's gonna be up my *ss like a bikeseat.

If you're a SAHM, it's great b/c there is only YOU telling the kids what to do and they don't have the additional distraction of another person.

If you are working, it totally SUCKS to have a travelling spouse b/c it is very hard to do the drop offs and pick up and commute and work. It just takes too long and the kids can't be in care centers from the opening bell to the closing bell.

I like it once a week, then I can watch all of my trash tv and not feel guilty. Other than that, no, life is much easier with him around. My house is dirtier and more cluttered with he is away. I get lazier and he does an equal share of the chores. So instead of 50-50 and a clean house it's 25-0 and and mad rush to clean before he comes home. Plus I don't sleep as well, so it starts a downward spiral. He makes me a better person. I wish I had enough will to do it all on my own, but I just don't have the drive or desire.

Shout out to the single moms.

I have to say, I'm kind of surprised how much I enjoy my DH's night shifts (almost like he's traveling). I swear my 20 month old behaves better...like he knows that Mommy is going to lose it if he acts up! My house definitely stays cleaner too, and I do appreciate the alone time.

My husband maybe takes a 1-week work trip every other year. This year he went out of the country for a wedding for 10 days. I sort of wish he were gone maybe 1 week or even 2 out of the month. I have 2 children under 3. It's not that we have a horrible relationship; I love him...but I kind of like the breaks. 1) I find myself more productive because I know I have to do it all myself (I SAH). There is no reprieve at the end of the day I'm counting on. It puts me in a different mindset. 2) It makes me appreciate him more when he's home. 3) My house stays cleaner. 4) It's nice to have some time alone.

I'm pretty sure I'm alone in this sentiment, but I thought I'd put it out there.