Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either your friend is dumb or she is not really a friend. Which one is it.

OP here. I think this is why I'm sad. Because I don't know the answer to this. If I had to guess, I would say she is dumb, which makes me a little less sad than to think that she is not really a friend. But either way, it's not a good thing.

OP, I'd say that to her - maybe somethign like, "Debbie, this is a classic pyramid scheme. I'm assuming you didn't realize that; the alternative is that you knowingly tried to involve me in a scam. I'm not going to report it, because I haven't been harmed, but you should consider reporting this to the appropriate authorities. Either way, I'd encourage you to stop soliciting people, and if you have gotten anyone to pay, apologizing and refunding their money. I know you'll be out $5,000 (at least). But that's the price you pay for not having the brains God gave a rutabaga."

OK, maybe leave off the last sentence.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should report it.

Not illegal.

The Federal Trade Commission disagrees. http://www.ftc.gov/speeches/other/dvimf16.shtm

I generally think a prerequisite of friendship is not trying to bilk me out of thousands of dollars. Maybe my standards are too high?

Anonymous wrote:Who on earth had $5000 lying around to "gift" some strange woman? Really?

Yeah, seriously, I would have laughed in her face when she said I should "gift" some stranger $5K and then I would have suggested that what could happen is each woman in the group could gift me $5K and then I would consider whether I want to be their friend.

I would be more inclined to think that your friend has been fooled by the prospect of making some easy money herself, not that she is trying to be a bad friend. You would be surprised what some otherwise fairly bright people will believe when it comes to money and the thought of making some easliy. Tell her that you are not interested and explain your concerns.

Anonymous wrote:You should report it.

Not illegal.

Can you tell her, look, I am your friend, but this sounds like a pyramid scheme and I won't participate? I mean, be as upfront as possible? Show her the website you just sent? Then you will at a minimum educate her, or at least find out if it's all a sham. I doubt the "friendship" could survive this, but you are probably lucky there.

The amount is enough that I might also call the police as well.

This is what I say when people invite me to their stupid shopping "parties" to sell me crap. Usually it's "no, I don't attend parties where things are sold." Period.

Ask yourself, "have I ever been invited to this person's house OTHER than for a shopping party?" Are the guest list and invite responses hidden in evite? These things are really cults, and you'd never see men selling this stuff and participating in this ripping each other off at their own homes, unless they are playing poker and everyone knows they are going to lose money and it's a game.

WTH?? This is insane!

Anonymous wrote:Either your friend is dumb or she is not really a friend. Which one is it.

OP here. I think this is why I'm sad. Because I don't know the answer to this. If I had to guess, I would say she is dumb, which makes me a little less sad than to think that she is not really a friend. But either way, it's not a good thing.

Either your friend is dumb or she is not really a friend. Which one is it.

You should report it.

Who on earth had $5000 lying around to "gift" some strange woman? Really?

Wow. That isn't even a complicated pyramid scheme.

Unfortunately even smart people fall for fast money schemes in bad economic times. Just say no. You don't have to see it as a referendum on her character.

A friend of mine mentioned last week that she wanted to invite me into her women's group. It sounded great: I like women; I like friends, whatever. So she came over today to talk about it while the kids were out of the house and described a supportive women's group where each new joiner "gifts" the women who has been in the group longest $5,000. She kept saying it's not a pyramid scheme, but it clearly is: The idea is that there are 8 people at the bottom, four people above them, two people above them, and one at the top, who receives $40k ($5k from each of the bottom people.) Once the person at the top gets her $40k, she steps aside, the group splits into to two groups and they recruit eight new people to be at the bottom and to "gift" $5k to the person at the top.

Clearly this is a pyramid scheme and I won't be doing it. (The whole thing is detailed here under the heading "Women Empowering Women": http://www.crimes-of-persuasion.com/Crimes/InPerson/MajorPerson/pyramid_clubs.htm) But I still feel really unsettled. I can't believe my friend is involved in something like this, and I can't believe she asked me to join. This is a smart woman with a smart husband. I just feel sad because I'm now starting to question our friendship.