I am a member of the PTA, in that I pay the dues,but I do not regularly attend the meetings. I think they are generically helpful meetings, but they are mainly a lot of talk, and I have a younger child at home, so too hard to arrange babysitting or husband home from work early so I can attend.

I do some volunteering, I really prefer the one-shot type volunteering activity, like bring in a food dish for the staff appreciation lunch on a specific day.

I think it is great that some parents do the major PTA work, but that is always going to be a smaller group of parents. It is probably worthwhile for PTA groups to organize a menu of volunteer activities and offer those out-- I think more people are willing to help with concrete, time-limited tasks. I don't want to chair the book fair, but I will commit to showing up on a tues night and staffing it for 2 hours.

I plan to join and donate but not volunteer because the women who are the core group are smug and act like they're entitled to both my time and my money. We are happy to give generously in our family to a variety of groups, but I don't like being drawn into the petty dynamics of the local PTA.

Not the OP but I am in the Churchill cluster but I know lots of people in the Whitman cluster. It is clear to me that schools in the Whitman cluster offer way more clubs and activities than our school does. So why is this? Both clusters are very affluent. Are more of their parents involved or donate more? It would be interesting to study.

Anonymous wrote:OP, what does being "well off" have to do with the PTA? If you are so well off you should consider donating more of your money and less of your time.

I'm no "so well off", whatever that means. We're probably middle of the pack for our area. My point was that a low percentage of families in this neighborhood are struggling--obviously, if you're struggling, it makes sense that a $10 PTA membership is off limits and that you really have other things to worry about than volunteering at school. On the other hand, you do see families who are obviously not struggling (unless those fancy cars have them buried in a mountain of debt) and who have multiple children attending the school and who are happy to sign them up for everything that's offered but don't lift a finger and don't give a penny.

And FYI, we donate both money and time to the school. I think that you'll find that a huge chunk of the money also comes from the same people who are doing the volunteering.

OP, what does being "well off" have to do with the PTA? If you are so well off you should consider donating more of your money and less of your time.

I'd rather give my money directly to the need so that 100% goes to the need. I don't like spending $25 on cookie dough (Sally Foster) that tastes terrible and only a fraction goes to the school. I'd rather give $25 to the school and skip the middleman.

Also, I feel like the PTA people don't really care what the rest of the parents who attend meetings think. They have already decided how they want to do things. I didn't have the time to go to meetings when I was working FT, and now that I'm not working FT, I have gone to meetings, but don't feel that it is worth my time. I do try to help out with events, set up, etc., but I'm not big into buying things I don't want just so the school can get $1.40 or some small amount. I do like the restaurant nights b/c at least I'm getting something at market value (the restaurant meal) and the school is getting something too.... I'm not over-paying for junk.

I have an infant and a toddler at home (4.5 year gap between my first 2 kids) so I only volunteer to do things like send in Christmas cookies or food for the teacher appreciation breakfast. I'm not going to pay a babysitter so I can volunteer, it's just not worth it to me. I figure we will be at our neighborhood school for a total of 14 years so I will be more involved when my younger children are in school.

Love that our school's only fundraiser is a letter at the beginning if the year asking for a donation. They also send out a list of volunteer opportunities for the whole year at the beginning, so you can decide what works for you. Oh, and you don't have to join the PTA, membership is automatic, although few go to the meetings, I think.

I really appreciate our PTA but I would be careful of assuming that you would raise more $ with more/larger fundraising events. This year our PTA sent out a letter saying they were skipping Sally Foster and other stuff in favor of a single fundraising letter which explained what they were raising money for, and I think it was pretty successful (I know sent them more than I ever would have given them through Sally Foster).

Time
And also I have never been into the mommy groups.
I am not that eager to go to the games or concerts either

I don't think ours is particularly cliche-ish. But it does always seem to be the same parents who do all the work. PTA is no different than sports or music boosters. Parents will always come to the game. But heaven forbid they work the concession. They'll come to the concerts. But they won't help with the planning or fundraising. They love to attend the fall festival or spring carnival, but they won't step up and help with the organization. Their kids enjoy playground equipment purchased with money raised by the PTA, but they won't even pay the $5.00 to join.

I'll admit it. It's frustrating. It is literally always the same relatively small group of parents doing the work.

OP here. I would guess most PTAs are clique-ish to some extent--if only because many of these parents have known each other a long time and kind of feel comfortable around one another.
I certainly don't feel like I'm one of the "in" people but I never volunteered because I wanted a social circle, only because I wanted to get positive things done for the school and my kids. I'm not looking necessarily to socialize with the other moms anymore than I would be looking to socialize with co-workers.

I work FT and it's hard to fit it in.

The PTA is very clique-ish at our school.

I belong, but only am able to volunteer for a handful of fundraising events due to work and family commitments. But time isn't the only reason that people don't volunteer. In both schools where I am a member, the PTA moms are quite tight and it's hard to break into be one of the crowd. I'm tenacious so I've done it, but it took about three years. But lots of my mom friends just gave up and sit on the sidelines.

I think you need to examine your own selves, as well as looking outside at where the others are failing you. I am also not sure that 50% is a low number.

People have lots of reasons:
family illness, no money, not sharing the preferences with the pta about how best to help the school, no interest, don't like the women who do dominate.... Frankly, a few dozen families is all anyone has.

I can't really believe people aren't moving to your district because of the PTA.

We live in a relatively well-off neighborhood, but only about 50% of families at our school even join the PTA.
Only a couple dozen people staff the various committees and run all the events that make it work year after year. Some of us feel so overspent that we're ready to throw in the towel. We have had to downsize fundraising efforts that could bring in tons more money if we had more people to help. As a result, the PTA offerings at our school pale in comparison to some other schools with similar demographics and one mom I talked to at one of my kids' outside classes mentioned that as a reason not to move into our district.

I'm just wondering what motivates people not to join their school's PTA and help out in whatever way they can. It's not like public schools are awash in money.