I married a man 30 years older than I am. Definitely NOT for the money. Don't jump to conclusions. I think it was a mistake-- we have since divorced-- but, at the time (in my mid-20s) he seemed fascinating, wise, stable, loving, etc. Yes, I guess I was looking for a father figure. Lasted over a decade. Glad it ended. But we have two perfectly wonderful children together, so I'll never really regret it. Now I'm with someone a couple of years younger!

Men have such huge egos compared to women that they all seem to think they are "God's gift" to us.

OK, I'll bite.

I think there can be a number of situations. I think most often, the guys are very egotistical and/or have inflated senses of entitlement. So, in a way, they are in denial about the mismatch or just think they are the sh!t and rightfully deserve the best women.

And then there are women that truly don't care about looks. Not saying that money isn't a huge pro on the pro/con list, but to many women looks aren't as important as you would think.

I'm no model, but I'm pretty "hot" and was always cute and popular growing up. I've NEVER been interested in looks. As long as I can remember. Even in high school, my friends would be so confused by my crushes. I'm not saying the woman you saw at the mall didn't marry for money, but even if she did, the gap might not seem as wide to her.

Anonymous wrote:"struck a cord" is a figure of speech"

Do you mean struck a chord?

Really, the missing "h" threw you off the expression, grammar police?

Anonymous wrote:"struck a cord" is a figure of speech"

Do you mean struck a chord?

LOL! Yes.....oops - I guess you figured out that English is a second language for me. I always screw up these sayings.

"struck a cord" is a figure of speech"

Do you mean struck a chord?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cant answer your question as I cannot relate however....I once heard an interview with Donald Trumps newest wife (who is hot and a super model) and the statement struck a cord and stuck with me why it made sense:

Interviewer: Some ppl say you married Donald Trump for his money - how would you respond:
The hot wife: I am with him for his money as much as he is with me for my looks.

Made sense to me.

Only to the most shallow.

What is a cord?

"struck a cord" is a figure of speech.
I meant that it makes sense to me why they would be together - two shallow ppl deserve each other, he is with her for her looks and she is with him for his money. They are both shallow and are a perfect couple for each other.
I dont know about other couples but I can judge this one since that is what she said - unless she is being sarcastic.

It goes both ways I guess - if it is ok for some woman to be with a man for his money, then I guess it is ok for him to be with her for her looks. They are both using each other in a loveless shallow marriage.

Anonymous wrote:I cant answer your question as I cannot relate however....I once heard an interview with Donald Trumps newest wife (who is hot and a super model) and the statement struck a cord and stuck with me why it made sense:

Interviewer: Some ppl say you married Donald Trump for his money - how would you respond:
The hot wife: I am with him for his money as much as he is with me for my looks.

Made sense to me.

Only to the most shallow.

What is a cord?

I think men are conditioned from a pretty early age to expect that women will look to them as providers... So a blatant acknowledgement of that is ok so long as the woman is not mocking him in some way.

Why does a woman who wants to marry a man with money looked at negatively? Like Marilyn Monroe said, who has time for being in love when you are spending all your time worried about paying the bills?

A woman being pretty may not be the only reason a man wants to marry her, but it helps. The same thing with money for man. Why is that a problem? Who wants to sit around being broke, fighting over how the last dollar is spent?

Sometimes I wish I would have put a bit more focus on the finances. But you live, learn, and appreciate what you have. If someone chooses a different path, good for them. Obviously all parties involved are comfortable with it.

I know a man who married his DW for an inheritance which hasn't happened almost 20 years later. She has supported him financially while he spent to the point of not even being able to use credit cards anymore. It's clear he doesn't love her. What if the inheritance never happens? DW's rich mom must know he is in it for her money and will probably leave it all to her other children or her grandchildren. But even if they get the money, what a sad life to choose, both for the DH and the DW.

I don't think you can judge the couple at the mall. Do you know them? Do you know the type of man she prefers to date? What her emotional needs are? What he's like? The mental wrestling she did about his age? You have a snapshot of them that you've filtered through your own emotional baggage and you've decided that she married him for his money. What if he's in fact broke, and maybe she's his daughter?

BTW, I have dinner about once a month with my own 78 year old father, and I can't tell you the number of times a waiter or some other person has "decided" I am his wife or girlfriend. Do you always assume that two people together are a couple?

I'm not a man but I have a very rich uncle who is 66 years old and is married to a beautiful 24 year-old. They also have a child together. My uncle seems to believe he looks like he is at least 25 years younger although he actually looks his age. He also believes he is still very handsome- he was very good-looking when he was young. I think he loves his wife and he definitely believes she loves him. Of course it's obvious to me that she can hardly stand him. Maybe this isn't the typical situation because my uncle's ego is ridiculously inflated and he's not entirely sane.

I cant answer your question as I cannot relate however....I once heard an interview with Donald Trumps newest wife (who is hot and a super model) and the statement struck a cord and stuck with me why it made sense:

Interviewer: Some ppl say you married Donald Trump for his money - how would you respond:
The hot wife: I am with him for his money as much as he is with me for my looks.

Made sense to me.

We were walking around the mall today and saw another couple that was (putting it politely) mismatched. She was mid-to-late 30s, well dressed and very attractive. She was no super model but definitely someone that most guys would find hot. He was mid-to-late 50s, also well dress but far from attractive. Bald, slightly overweight, etc. They had three children with them and while two of them took after the mother the youngest daughter had a bit of a Rumor Willis thing going on (Bruce Willis face on Demi Moore's head).

Based on the age difference, the fact that they were all very well dressed and the apparent age difference between the couple, I can only assume that she married him for his money. Sure, it's possible that they were really in love, but I seriously have my doubts.

From other posts on this topic, I think I have a decent understanding of the woman's perspective, but I've always wanted to know from the guy's perspective: What's it like to be married to a gold digger? Are you okay with it? Did you marry your wife for anything besides her looks? Did you have a pre-nup buttoned up and ready to go? Is this your second marriage and you just figured, "What the hell, if I have to be nagged all the time it might as well be by a hottie?"

Seriously, what's the deal?