I agree, it always feels creepy to give cash or cash equivalents-- like you're tipping.

Clearly, you are not from New York City, where paying off -- I mean giving a $$$$$$ gift -- is expected for everyone from doormen to teachers to plumbers to camp directors to therapist. No joke.

private school teacher here - please don't fret over gift giving. Instead, help out more at the school, if possible. Donate that money specifically to an area that you particularly value at the school like, supplies for the teachers room (most have a wish list), sound system for auditorium, new athletic gear, books for library, new plantings for grounds, the list is endless. You can donate in the name of the teacher that you were going to give a gift to. Get together with friends and have it make more of an impact. Donate volunteers hours toward events. Just a thought.

We usually contribute to the group gift and then also send in a card made by the child, with his/her photo in it and a nice note from the child and from us. Sometimes we add some tiny little object chosen by the child. A doodad if some sort.

Do I think the teacher "wants" lots of doodads in the abstract? No. But do I think teachers with hearts appreciate getting little things that children consider special? Yes, actually. My children also give me weird little doodads that I don't particularly want, and I am always touched.

I agree, it always feels creepy to give cash or cash equivalents-- like you're tipping. I have sometimes given amazon certificates with a note saying "perhaps this will be helpful for classroom items." Maybe they actually spend it on themselves... if so, fine with me, but it feels less awkward.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP -- OP didn't mention what level of schooling.

True, but most of the threads in this forum refer to elementary school and up, and I think the parent-teacher can change significantly between preschool and elementary. That said, I agree with you about not dumping junk on teachers.

Just to clarify.. we are in one of the privates that has a nursery program.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Anonymous wrote:PP -- OP didn't mention what level of schooling.

True, but most of the threads in this forum refer to elementary school and up, and I think the parent-teacher can change significantly between preschool and elementary. That said, I agree with you about not dumping junk on teachers.

Our school did away with group gifts. I don't understand why. The gifts were always from the class and did not identify who contributed or how much. There was no pressure to contribute. It enabled parents to recognize teachers and give them something they would actually use (usually a gift card) in a meaningful collective amount. I can't imagine that teachers want to receive 50 Starbucks cards for $10.

PP -- OP didn't mention what level of schooling. It really doesn't matter -- parents should learn from the "get go" not to just dump junk on the teachers and should also know that teachers will pitch most of the homemade food if they don't know the parents. I mean really..would you want to eat homemade cookies if you didn't know whether the people might have dogs/cats/whatever running all over their kitchen?

Anonymous wrote:We ask each family to make a small cash contribution for each classroom teacher (there are 2 in our class) and we buy a group gift... a gift card, a potted plant, and a card.

I totally agree with the PP, your teachers don't want your junk! Preschool teachers don't get paid a lot so a gift card is actually a really thoughtful gift.

Isn't this thread about elementary school and up?

When there has been a group gift, I push for money or an Amex card. When we are on our own, I give money (< $25) accompanied by a card made by DC. We've received the nicest thank you notes about how the money was spent.

We ask each family to make a small cash contribution for each classroom teacher (there are 2 in our class) and we buy a group gift... a gift card, a potted plant, and a card.

I totally agree with the PP, your teachers don't want your junk! Preschool teachers don't get paid a lot so a gift card is actually a really thoughtful gift.

There was a long thread on this topic maybe last holiday season. It really depends on which school you're talking about. I have a lot of friends who are teachers. They say unless they know the family really well -- they'd never eat food brought in. They pitch it. Save your time and money ...teachers appreciate gift cards or a nice holiday card. They don't need any more mugs or perfume they can't wear. One friend said some family gave her the free extra gifts that come with those perfume sets. She said families frequently gave out junk like that. Remember teachers are people too! They don't need your junk.

Now that I've written that I realize those are exactly the types of gifts we tried to avoid in preschool. In preschool, we always gave cash through the group gift. I can't quite explain why but I would feel a little awkward giving the current teachers cash-like gifts like gift cards. I try to give them more of the type of small, hopefully thoughtful token I would give a friend. It may be because they are better paid than the preschool teachers and because a number of them are friends, since they also have kids in the school.

Most schools have policies saying any gifts should be modest--say, under $25. Your gifts sound very nice and I'm sure are appreciated, but don't feel pressured either--lots of people don't give a gift and that is fine too. I do see a lot of Starbucks gift cards, and see a lot of teachers at Starbucks, so that works too!

At our school there are no group gifts. We do a mix of the following: things made by my kids, flowering plants, homemade baked goods, storebought treats, small desk-type presents (fancy pencils, e.g.). We may end up with gifts to a dozen or more people just at school, so I try to keep each one under $15.

What do you usually give the teacher? At our school, they do a group contribution towards a gift, but most people also give something "small". Of course, I'm not really sure of the range of the small gift. It could be diamond earrings for all I know. I've done cookies, small presents from stores like Pier 1, non-expensive earrings and flowers. What do others do? I thought that private school parents might have a different standard than the general public school thread would indicate. Thanks!