Anonymous wrote:This is a real question, asked with kindness - at what point do you let your child make and navigate their own choices?

This is a real question. At what point do you let people parent their own children and navigate their own choices?

Reddit transfer sub

Anonymous wrote:Having been through this both as a student and a parent, it is really up to the student and what they feel in their gut. Every situation is different. Have conversations with your kid, and hopefully they have others they trust. And have them look into options with respect to deadlines on taking a semester or more off, etc.
This isn't something a book is going to help your kid decide.

This. Also, keep an open mind and assure them that you will support whatever decision they make.

I was not academically prepared for college, and the college counselors were of no help. I ended up taking a leave of absence, going home and taking classes at the local university before going back to my original school — in the end, while I had a better academic year, I realized the school was not the right fit, so I transferred.

Having been through this both as a student and a parent, it is really up to the student and what they feel in their gut. Every situation is different. Have conversations with your kid, and hopefully they have others they trust. And have them look into options with respect to deadlines on taking a semester or more off, etc.
This isn't something a book is going to help your kid decide.

My cousin did this. He took a year off during Covid due to physical issues. It was really a conversation with his parents and doctors and then he figured out what the school needed to make it happen.

Anonymous wrote:My kid has a therapist who has been helpful in talking through options. If the school has counselors / a counseling center they can probably help the student sort through their thinking.

If it’s based on academic issues I think that’s a bit different and I’d probably get involved in the decision making.

This. As the parent of a child with disabilities that make it more likely that she might face this decision in the future, I would, in conjunction with her, consult with her mental health providers.

My kid has a therapist who has been helpful in talking through options. If the school has counselors / a counseling center they can probably help the student sort through their thinking.

If it’s based on academic issues I think that’s a bit different and I’d probably get involved in the decision making.

I think by providing the resources you are essentially telling you child that the school that they picked is wrong.

Terrible way to start college for a student.

Anonymous wrote:This is a real question, asked with kindness - at what point do you let your child make and navigate their own choices?

There's nothing wrong with providing your student with some resources....books, podcasts, direct experience, etc. When they are trying to make big decisions. You can offer guidance without making the decision for them.

This is a real question, asked with kindness - at what point do you let your child make and navigate their own choices?

Any recommendations for resources / podcasts / parent groups to help a student navigate what the decisions?

I am not sure the school support / advising is the right answer and want to at least prepare alternatives to help figure out what he wants and options.