Thinking more, I would suggest Acorn Hill Waldorf Kindergarten. They have an outdoor program that would give a social boost. It’s a key age for social emotional development and they are great at this. The academics will come for your child no doubt, but these other aspects have a window of optimization.

All this said, my guess is that it’s a bridge too far for the OP. Nevertheless, I encourage a visit.

“Unique quirks” “deeply empathetic” “strong drive to direct play” “can be quite particular about how things are done” “able to focus on a single interesting task (e.g., puzzles, legos) for several hours.” Has an easier time socializing with “older kids” (who are more socially adept and thus able to accommodate his deficiencies) even though he “wants to fit in with peers.”

You already “know he is different.”

I don’t want to issue an armchair diagnosis, but this kid is an AuDHD diagnosis waiting to happen.

Yes, even if he “doesn’t require a significant amount of support.” All individualized approaches to the curriculum, including “noticing of capability and personalization of enrichment,” is an accommodation. You’ll be more likely to get an IEP as he gets older and social expectations grow. My kid was non-disruptive, so it wasn’t until 5th grade.

I don’t know what advice to give you. I think you are focused on the wrong things. I think the things you say you want (personalized acceleration, private school but only in later grades) suggest you think of private school as primarily a matter of academic achievement. But the stronger independent schools around here have their pick of smart-enough kids; they will not want a “quirky” child, no matter how advanced. My own similar kid had a good experience with one of the DCPS schools you named, and has stuck with DCPS (which is far from perfect but is better in reality than it appears on DCUM). But I never had expectations like yours about individualized acceleration in early elementary school. For that I guess I’d look at Basis McLean or Nysmith, but my actual recommendation would be to focus on figuring out what kind of social experience (and, possibly, intervention) would actually be in your child’s best interest, because it is likely to be social issues, not academics, that will hold him back in school and in life.

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thank you all for your thoughtful messages and reviews of the various school systems.

To the poster that mentioned their daughter diagnosed with autism, how does this show up for her and what did it mean ultimately in terms of schooling and related support?

I know he is different and we had him evaluated for an IEP before he started 3s (he did not qualify). I'm not sure what the label will get him as I'm not sure he requires a significant amount of support but rather a noticing of capability and personalization of enrichment- I'm looking more for what environment is used to working with kids who need a bit more to be their best self.

We asked his current school and they said he'd be fine wherever he went but certain environments would be better for him to thrive (this was in the context of him leaving his school for 4s or moving to the DCPS system). I think that sums it up - he would be fine in an environment that didn't have such personalized enrichment, he'd learn a bit, make some friends and probably be fine in the early years. Without a push at this age, he wouldn't automatically seek out harder math or reading that I know he's capable of. We also want to nurture some of these other different skillsets like putting together complicated puzzles - maybe that looks like a robotics club or class in a few years.

It sounds like, for example, if Beauvoir is as stated above then that wouldn't be the right fit. We would prefer teachers who see that he can do more and continue to encourage it rather than sticking with meeting the class standards.

We are continuing to tour and ask questions but would love to hear more from the board on the various schools and any specifics on similar children and what worked.

I am the autism girl PP. For her it does not show up as giftedness but does show up as very much wanting to do her thing, sometimes getting distracted and not paying attention because she is in her own world. Reciprocal play is also an issue. She doesn't get services in school, but does get some accommodations, including extra prompting and extra time. Outside of school we do occupational therapy once a week and a social skills class once a week.

OP here - thank you all for your thoughtful messages and reviews of the various school systems.

To the poster that mentioned their daughter diagnosed with autism, how does this show up for her and what did it mean ultimately in terms of schooling and related support?

I know he is different and we had him evaluated for an IEP before he started 3s (he did not qualify). I'm not sure what the label will get him as I'm not sure he requires a significant amount of support but rather a noticing of capability and personalization of enrichment- I'm looking more for what environment is used to working with kids who need a bit more to be their best self.

We asked his current school and they said he'd be fine wherever he went but certain environments would be better for him to thrive (this was in the context of him leaving his school for 4s or moving to the DCPS system). I think that sums it up - he would be fine in an environment that didn't have such personalized enrichment, he'd learn a bit, make some friends and probably be fine in the early years. Without a push at this age, he wouldn't automatically seek out harder math or reading that I know he's capable of. We also want to nurture some of these other different skillsets like putting together complicated puzzles - maybe that looks like a robotics club or class in a few years.

It sounds like, for example, if Beauvoir is as stated above then that wouldn't be the right fit. We would prefer teachers who see that he can do more and continue to encourage it rather than sticking with meeting the class standards.

We are continuing to tour and ask questions but would love to hear more from the board on the various schools and any specifics on similar children and what worked.

Anonymous wrote:Avoid Beauvoir. They don’t do well with the type of kid you describe. Very little attempt or ability to meet the needs of kids who are gifted. Run of the mill smart kids (and not so smart kids)- yes. Anything out of the norm either way is not something they will accommodate. Our friends have a pre-ker there now (also have older kids) and when they asked the teachers for ideas on how they could support their child’s advanced reading f at home, they were told that their child was already exceeding the literacy objectives for pre-K so they wouldn’t suggest anything. Our friends were very taken aback. Their older children have also struggled to find challenge at the school. Look elsewhere.

“Very taken aback”. LOL. You people are insane.

Hmm actually he’s on the cusp of being too old to start Montessori. Call them tomorrow and see.

Montessori is excellent for a child like you describe. Go tour Aiden Montessori in NW. it’s AMI which is the gold standard/authentic. Your son will be continually challenged as he can work at his level. There’s no ceiling. It’s a mixed age group and there is great respect given to focused work and uninterrupted concentration, no need to rush onto a teacher led craft or the next project. Kids can dig deep. I think that you will be very pleased with this option.

Avoid Beauvoir. They don’t do well with the type of kid you describe. Very little attempt or ability to meet the needs of kids who are gifted. Run of the mill smart kids (and not so smart kids)- yes. Anything out of the norm either way is not something they will accommodate. Our friends have a pre-ker there now (also have older kids) and when they asked the teachers for ideas on how they could support their child’s advanced reading f at home, they were told that their child was already exceeding the literacy objectives for pre-K so they wouldn’t suggest anything. Our friends were very taken aback. Their older children have also struggled to find challenge at the school. Look elsewhere.

Clear signs of gifted behavior. Alert the press!

(Sorry, I couldn’t help it. You sound like ver caring parents.)

I may be misreading your OP, but I am inferring that your child's behavior differs from the norm at his prek. The behaviors you describe sound like possible neurodivergence, like ADHD or autism. In your shoes I might try to have a frank conversation with his teachers about how they think he will do in K and how much he differs from his peers. That could give you a basis to decide if he needs further evaluation. You could also seek a child find screening through the school district, just be aware of the scope of these screenings - they told me my child was "fine" but she was diagnosed with autism privately within a year.

The risk of private school is they have no obligation to accommodate differences and their willingness to do so will go down as the child gets older and academic and social expectations increase.

Anonymous wrote:Note that we intend to ultimately send him to an independent school - somewhere around 3rd or 5th.

Understand that there are tons of other families that will be employing the same "wait until 3rd/5th before applying to private" strategy if you are targeting the very competitive admissions schools.

Your child will have plenty of peers in public or private schools in NW. Back when my oldest was 3 we did the IQ testing because that was required or at least the norm for most private school admissions. (That’s changed!) Anyway he was about 130 and always had plenty of peers and kids even more intellectually inclined in a variety of schools. Lots of smart kids.

I would look at WIS, their primary years program caters to this type of learner and adds in an additional "puzzle" of immersion into a new language which is amazing for a kid already gifted in language. Kindergarten is one of their 2 main entry years (other being pre-K) and while most kids stay through graduation, some do move to STA or other top schools that open up later that the parents ultimately prefer without issue.

I'm not sure what cut off you're referring to in June, b/c MCPS and DCPS both have birthday cut offs in September.

That aside CHS attracts lots of kids from those NW schools, so worth checking out. Definitely has a different feel than high quality publics and depending on your kid's "unique profile," could be a good fit. I'd put Sheridan in that same category.

We are trying to decide between enrolling our DC at a UNW in-boundry DCPS or apply to an independent for K. He is currently enrolled at a wonderful pre-K program in UNW that has really nurtured him and accepted his unique quirks

Our DC will be one of the younger kids in the classroom (turning 4 right before the cutoff this June) and is showing clear signs of gifted behavior. He seems to be advanced in certain areas—specifically, his spatial skills, memory, and vocabulary.

He is also a deeply empathetic near 4-year old who wants to fit in with peers while having a strong drive to direct play and can be quite particular about how things are done. He also naturally gravitates toward older kids and is completely able to hold his own and keep up conversations.

We are mainly seeking the right environment to keep him stimulated, as when he is under-stimulated or a task is too simple he loses focus; however, we know that attention is not the issue as he is able to focus on a single interesting task (e.g., puzzles, legos) for several hours. We are also looking for a place that uses his key interests to move him forward and that may offer more personalized enrichment in math and reading.

Interested to hear thoughts from others who may have been in a similar predicament with a child with a unique profile that may benefit from a more customized approach and may have been considering a public environment with a similar teacher-to-student ratio as the independent. What made you select one or the other? From our limited tours, some of the lower schools seem to be akin to the public experience in UNW at least at the lower levels?

Note that we intend to ultimately send him to an independent school - somewhere around 3rd or 5th.