Anonymous
Post 05/19/2026 18:35     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
Op, you have offended a lot of incompetent people here.
Anonymous
Post 05/19/2026 18:33     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
Anonymous wrote:He's a fine person, not mean or rude, but doesn't seem to know the substance of what we do very well or have good advice. He often gives direction that doesn't make sense or show an understanding of our subject matter. I try to remain polite, but am getting frustrated as there is no one to go to for help or direction except coworkers. I would be fine with having a beer with him and making chit chat, but I don't want to work for him any more. Is this normal? How have others handled it?


Is there anyone outside of your group or your company that you can ask for help?
Anonymous
Post 05/19/2026 18:28     Subject: Re:Boss is nice but incompetent
Also, if the source of your disappointment is the lack of a promotion - than you need to accept that you have a bias viewpoint. You can and should also try to tell your boss what you need from him (aside from a promotion/more money) and be proactive about your training and development while you decide whether to stick it out or not.


It's not about a promotion, which I have not applied for. It's more about the fact that my old boss was a lot better, and I miss him. He had answers and guidance for employees.
Anonymous
Post 05/18/2026 14:23     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
Not my job to do your job. I am over needy employees.

I like to say I am your boss not your therapist
Anonymous
Post 05/18/2026 12:42     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
OP, if a white man is as competent as a competent middle aged woman, he’d be in executives ranks and you will never meet or interact with him and he doesn’t need to be nice to you.
Anonymous
Post 05/18/2026 08:48     Subject: Re:Boss is nice but incompetent
If I had a dime for every person I knew who thinks their boss is incompetent...
Anonymous
Post 05/18/2026 08:45     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:He's a fine person, not mean or rude, but doesn't seem to know the substance of what we do very well or have good advice. He often gives direction that doesn't make sense or show an understanding of our subject matter. I try to remain polite, but am getting frustrated as there is no one to go to for help or direction except coworkers. I would be fine with having a beer with him and making chit chat, but I don't want to work for him any more. Is this normal? How have others handled it?


First, there is a more to managing a team than being the subject matter expert. And as a PP noted, a nice boss is WAYYY better than a boss that micromanages or has unrealistic expectations. Also, if the source of your disappointment is the lack of a promotion - than you need to accept that you have a bias viewpoint. You can and should also try to tell your boss what you need from him (aside from a promotion/more money) and be proactive about your training and development while you decide whether to stick it out or not.

You say you don't want to work for him anymore - so go find a new job - no one is stopping you from taking charge of your career choices. But don't be surprised if you find yourself looking back and realizing how good it was to have a mean/strict boss.

-Someone who has had more bad bosses than nice the last 30 years.


*boss that wasnt mean
Anonymous
Post 05/18/2026 08:44     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
Anonymous wrote:He's a fine person, not mean or rude, but doesn't seem to know the substance of what we do very well or have good advice. He often gives direction that doesn't make sense or show an understanding of our subject matter. I try to remain polite, but am getting frustrated as there is no one to go to for help or direction except coworkers. I would be fine with having a beer with him and making chit chat, but I don't want to work for him any more. Is this normal? How have others handled it?


First, there is a more to managing a team than being the subject matter expert. And as a PP noted, a nice boss is WAYYY better than a boss that micromanages or has unrealistic expectations. Also, if the source of your disappointment is the lack of a promotion - than you need to accept that you have a bias viewpoint. You can and should also try to tell your boss what you need from him (aside from a promotion/more money) and be proactive about your training and development while you decide whether to stick it out or not.

You say you don't want to work for him anymore - so go find a new job - no one is stopping you from taking charge of your career choices. But don't be surprised if you find yourself looking back and realizing how good it was to have a mean/strict boss.

-Someone who has had more bad bosses than nice the last 30 years.
Anonymous
Post 05/17/2026 19:42     Subject: Re:Boss is nice but incompetent
Anonymous wrote:
Did you post this?
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1324643.page


No. Just to add, while he is nice as a person, it feels very unfair for me and my coworkers, most of whom are very experienced middle aged women, to be babying this middle aged man and help him be able to do his job.


I had a boss like this once. Better than a toxic boss any day!
Just manage up. What do you want? Maybe he's really good at protecting you from the larger boss(es) and budgets, etc. You don't know. Could be so much worse.
Anonymous
Post 05/17/2026 19:30     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
My best boss knew absolutely zero about my subject matter but was so good at listening to me and giving me the confidence I needed to do hard stuff. He was knowledgeable about the bigger organizational picture, but really could not advise me on the details of my work. If they are getting in your way, that’s on you to communicate. What do you want from them exactly?
Anonymous
Post 05/17/2026 17:22     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
You sound insufferable OP.
Anonymous
Post 05/17/2026 16:34     Subject: Re:Boss is nice but incompetent
Did you post this?
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1324643.page


No. Just to add, while he is nice as a person, it feels very unfair for me and my coworkers, most of whom are very experienced middle aged women, to be babying this middle aged man and help him be able to do his job.
Anonymous
Post 05/17/2026 14:16     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
You have to give him the advice. Tell him what you're doing and what the timetable is and what you need to support you. If you just need him to bless something, just lay it all out and write at the end "Is this ok with you?" or literally write a proposal for him to just sign. Sometimes you even have to draft emails from him in the first person for him to copy and paste to his bosses.
Anonymous
Post 05/17/2026 14:14     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
Did you post this?
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1324643.page
Anonymous
Post 05/17/2026 14:09     Subject: Boss is nice but incompetent
He's a fine person, not mean or rude, but doesn't seem to know the substance of what we do very well or have good advice. He often gives direction that doesn't make sense or show an understanding of our subject matter. I try to remain polite, but am getting frustrated as there is no one to go to for help or direction except coworkers. I would be fine with having a beer with him and making chit chat, but I don't want to work for him any more. Is this normal? How have others handled it?