I used to think things like this were no big deal OP, but as I get older I realize optics (what others at the wedding would think when they learned you guys traveled together) and what my partner thinks even if my intentions are good (assuming he has been reacted reasonably in the past).

You probably should have run it by him first OP.

However, he should have definitely not yelled at you at all---especially not in front of your DD.

It sounds like it has more to do with this friend in particular, since he doesn’t like him personally. Did you know about this issue already? Does he have good reason for disliking him? If so, you can have your opinions, but are definitely in the wrong from my perspective. His yelling is a product of you showing him a complete lack of respect and not taking his concerns seriously.

My ex wife ended up having an affair with the one “friend” that I disliked immediately. It was a case of soft boundaries creating opportunities for a man with ill intentions. Be careful with this “friend”.

Anonymous wrote:You may look at the guy as just a friend but I wouldn’t be surprised if the guy looks at you differently and your husband picks that up.

So? DH should trust her that she sees him as a friend. I would be really upset by this too. He needs to deal with it.

Why do you need to travel w someone else?
Is this friend a pilot? Does this friend own a private jet?

Anyways, OP you’re the asshol*

It's as if he's following the playbook of Mike and Mother Pence. Most sane people would not care about this.

It doesn’t seem bad.

Eh. From a practical standpoint - I agree with you. I think he is being jealous and he needs to use his college educated words to have a meaningful discussion with you about his feelings.

Yes, he is being unreasonable. It's not like the two of you are taking a romantic trip together. You're taking the same flight and then attending a wedding with a bunch of other people. Your husband is ridiculous. I would be sooo mad if he yelled at me in front of our child too.

You’re not being insensitive. He needs to get over it.

I think unless this guy friend is gay - most husbands would not be too happy w/this setup.

Mostly because men know how men think (and behave!!) 😜

I do agree that it's weird and I can understand him being suspicious, but he shouldn't be yelling at you to the extent it's making your daughter nervous.

You may look at the guy as just a friend but I wouldn’t be surprised if the guy looks at you differently and your husband picks that up.

He’s insecure.

just seemed practical/convenient to coordinate travel together

This makes no sense.

If it was your husband, would it be more "practical/convenient" for him to travel with one of his male/female old college friends? Of course not.

Sorry. You don't sound credible.

My husband and I got into a huge fight today (first one in months) and now I’m wondering who’s being unreasonable.

One of my old male college friends invited me to fly with him to attend our mutual female friend’s wedding. We’ve all known each other forever and there has never been anything romantic between us. It’s a short trip (about a 2-hour flight) and honestly just seemed practical/convenient to coordinate travel together.

My husband is furious about it and says he doesn’t want me to travel with my friend. I said he could come if he wanted, but he dislikes my friend, and says no. Today he yelled at me about it in front of our 6 year old daughter, which upset her so much she started crying. That bothered me more than the argument itself.

I told him I understand why he may feel uncomfortable and I’m sorry about that, but the ticket is already booked and I truly don’t feel like I’m doing anything wrong. I also don’t want to miss my friend’s wedding over this.

Would this bother other men here? Am I being insensitive, or is my husband overreacting?