Lesson learned, OP. When the relative's closest relatives refuse to have them stay at their house, you shouldn't either.

I would tell her that I would need the car to get to work and tell her I will help her change her flight date.
Not sure about what happens if her flight can't be moved. I wouldn't actually throw her out of my house.

I think you need to suck up the extra 2 days, DH needs to do EVERYTHING with respect to dealing with her, and you need to think carefully before hosting her again.

Just tell her she's welcome to stay but you cannot take any more time off and you need your car back for work and kids stuff. Help her rent a car. Just take her out to eat for the two days to keep her out of the kitchen or order carryout.

Why isn't your husband helping?

Tell her no! In the future if you invite her to a half day event be clear that this does not involve hosting!

OMG during the busiest time of year? Tell her no.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Out of curiosity, what does the return day matter? Is there a reason she needs to travel back on a specific day?

I think you can tell her that you have an important work meeting and you need to prepare for the next couple of days and you won’t be able to make those extra two days work. But, why doesn’t your husband step up?

She has stayed for 6 days so far. She is supposed to leave tomorrow. She wants to stay an additional two days after tomorrow to visit with her friends.

Maybe she can stay with her friends! 🤣

Six days is a generous amount of time to host. Use your work as an excuse, but your husband needs to back you up on this.

Anonymous wrote:Out of curiosity, what does the return day matter? Is there a reason she needs to travel back on a specific day?

I think you can tell her that you have an important work meeting and you need to prepare for the next couple of days and you won’t be able to make those extra two days work. But, why doesn’t your husband step up?

She has stayed for 6 days so far. She is supposed to leave tomorrow. She wants to stay an additional two days after tomorrow to visit with her friends.

It's not shocking to learn that her own son who is local to you is not interested in having her around either. Your husband needs to tell her to leave as planned.

"No, that doesn't work for us." And if your husband doesn't back you, I'd take my car and check into a hotel for the two days.

Out of curiosity, what does the return day matter? Is there a reason she needs to travel back on a specific day?

I think you can tell her that you have an important work meeting and you need to prepare for the next couple of days and you won’t be able to make those extra two days work. But, why doesn’t your husband step up?

Anonymous wrote:So I'm a people pleaser and would have to make up a story. Maybe you are more direct than me but don't feel bad if you have to tell a white lie!

Feign work travel and also that your car is needed.

Honestly I would go stay at a local hotel (with my car) to get out of this.

I thought I would be more sympathetic to the aunt until I read the post!

No is a complete sentence.

So I'm a people pleaser and would have to make up a story. Maybe you are more direct than me but don't feel bad if you have to tell a white lie!

I invited my husband’s aunt from out of state for a small, half-day family function and told her there was absolutely no pressure to attend. She booked a flight, then asked to stay with us for 6 days and for me to pick her up and drop her off at the airport. She’s really the only living relative on my husband’s side who shows much interest in our son.

Since my husband’s dad passed away, there has been a lot of family tension, especially around getting his mom into care. His sister got heavily involved and did not want their mom to move out of her house. My MIL ended up moving into four different assisted living facilities in one year, and got kicked out because of her high needs and behaviors - and now she’s living with SIL. Because of all of that, my husband rarely sees his sister or mom outside of holidays and birthdays.

I’m just overwhelmed with hosting at this point. DH’s aunt stays up until 2 AM with all the lights on and the TV blasting, then sleeps until noon. She insists on cooking even after I’ve told her she doesn’t need to, but she makes things we realistically won’t eat — like tuna salad with wasabi or potato salad with raisins. She’s also not particularly careful about handwashing and will lick her fingers while cooking or mix food with her hands, which honestly grosses me out. I hosted all of DH’s family on Saturday, and honestly I am completely exhausted from dealing with his aunties and mom. His aunt constantly complains that it’s too cold, that the water pressure isn’t strong enough, and she’s started wearing my husband’s bathrobe around the house like she lives here. She also keeps trying to tickle our 7-year-old even after he has clearly told her to STOP.

She seems mostly interested in cooking food, taking it to her friends, and driving my car around, which honestly terrifies me because she can barely get in and out of the vehicle safely. I’m trying to be gracious because she’s family and because she’s one of the few relatives who shows interest in our son, but I’m completely overwhelmed and my patience is running out.

What’s also odd is that her son lives only 20 minutes away, but she doesn’t seem interested in staying with him, and it doesn’t sound like she’s been invited to either. She and my MIL also have this bizarre dynamic where they constantly make snide comments about each other behind their backs.

She already extended the trip longer than expected to see friends and family, and now she realized she accidentally booked her return flight for the wrong day and wants to stay two more days. I genuinely cannot do it. I’m about to lose my mind. I feel like I’m constantly cleaning dishes, tidying up, and managing the house, while she makes comments about how my husband doesn’t do enough.

I also had no PTO left to spend extra time with her, so I’ve been working from home during part of the visit. Even then, she’s constantly in my space — knocking on my bedroom door while I’m showering, interrupting work to ask for random kitchen items, etc.

I need to tell her I can’t host her past tomorrow, which was the original departure date, but I don’t want to come across as rude.