Rude and deceitful. They don't have to include you but if plan was for all to get together than its not fair to you.

Anonymous wrote:Not overreacting and so so so rude. Fine if they want to get together, but if you three had talked about doing plans together at least have enough manners not to post about it! I would probably cut way back on seeing the local friend.

+1
I am sorry that this happened OP. I would be so upset if the same happened to me.
You do not deserve to be treated this way.

I would state you are hurt. But know how the respond really won't do much. Their actions mattered. I'm sorry Op. It's sad when you don't have the friendship you thought you had.

Put your efforts into other people. You don't need to figure-out these two - do not waste energy on them.

Anonymous wrote:I would be hurt and confused. I don’t know that there’s anything that will make this feel better. I’d let it go and wait to see if one of them reaches out. I’m sorry.

I agree with this exactly.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks, all. I’m very sensitive so I always question myself about these things.

PP, I responded saying I was very open prior to local friend saying she would get back to us. Granted, I did not follow-up so I could see how that would look like I was not interested. That is good feedback, thank you.

If you said you were open yet the other friend never responded I’m not sure why you feel like it didn’t look like you were interested. They clearly had an off line conversation with just the two of them without asking your availability.

That's hurtful, OP. Are you sure you didn't miss a text or email?

Were you three best friends in college? Or would this be a sort-of random grouping of three people who just happened to be in the same place?

I agree that you seem to have been disengaged and passive. Why would they have though you wanted to be included if you didn’t engage actively in sharing your own availability and excitement for a gathering?

Thanks, all. I’m very sensitive so I always question myself about these things.

PP, I responded saying I was very open prior to local friend saying she would get back to us. Granted, I did not follow-up so I could see how that would look like I was not interested. That is good feedback, thank you.

This is bizarre and rude. But, it also seems odd that you never chimed in with when you were available. Are you generally passive? It could be that if you never responded then you seemed uninterested.

Bad, no obnoxious behavior. I’d cut them off without a second thought.

I would be hurt and confused. I don’t know that there’s anything that will make this feel better. I’d let it go and wait to see if one of them reaches out. I’m sorry.

I would be hurt. When you bring this up with them be prepared for them to have some lame explanation like out of town friend was in local friend's neighborhood, they thought you were busy, they messed up a text chain, etc.

Not overreacting and so so so rude. Fine if they want to get together, but if you three had talked about doing plans together at least have enough manners not to post about it! I would probably cut way back on seeing the local friend.

people have lost their minds. and their manners. I don't know why everyone is just "bucket-listing" and treating each other like they don't matter. I'm sorry you went through that. I would probably say something to the local friend the next time you see them. Or you might want to reevaluate whether you see them as a priority/close friend anymore.

I have two friends from college, one is local and one is out of state. I see the local friend once a month and the out of state friend once or twice a year.

Out of state friend texted us both saying she will be in town next month. Local friend responded saying she will get back to us with her availability. Local friend never got back to us. Fast forward to this weekend, local friend and out of state friend posted pictures of them at a sporting event.

I’m truly upset and confused. I haven’t said anything to either one. Am I right to be upset or should I just let it go?