Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your hhi is under 300k, do you sometimes do something like a tea at a beautiful hotel, a round of golf (if you golf, or whatever equivalent) at a local resort, a concert that costs $500/ticket...? I never do any of these things. I was at a gorgeous hotel last week just passing by and saw the tea and it looked like an experience I would enjoy, but I find it very hard spending $250+ on a single event over in one hour or two.

When we were at that income level, we would budget/plan for how to spend our "entertainment/extra" budget. But I do agree, when we were at that level, it was difficult to spend that much for a small event.

But it really comes down to a budget. As long as you are saving adequately (15-20% overall between retirement and regular), then yes you can budget for things like that if you feel it's worth it. Many time, when you have to wait and think, you decide "nope, not worth spending that amount for that item".

The problem is I always delay and decide it’s not worth it so we do nothing like this. We are saving. I’ve never been able to set a budget for non essentials. We just don’t spend on things like takeout, coffee out, eating out for ourselves, I do my own hair color and cut…but if we’re out on an outing and teens want a special coffee then I have no issue buying that for them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your hhi is under 300k, do you sometimes do something like a tea at a beautiful hotel, a round of golf (if you golf, or whatever equivalent) at a local resort, a concert that costs $500/ticket...? I never do any of these things. I was at a gorgeous hotel last week just passing by and saw the tea and it looked like an experience I would enjoy, but I find it very hard spending $250+ on a single event over in one hour or two.

When we were at that income level, we would budget/plan for how to spend our "entertainment/extra" budget. But I do agree, when we were at that level, it was difficult to spend that much for a small event.

But it really comes down to a budget. As long as you are saving adequately (15-20% overall between retirement and regular), then yes you can budget for things like that if you feel it's worth it. Many time, when you have to wait and think, you decide "nope, not worth spending that amount for that item".

Anonymous wrote:Life is short do it. I’ve done all the things you’ve listed but not in a performative or strivey way. There are bands we like and when they tour we will pay to see them. Certain sporting events too. Tea isn’t my thing locally but we did it in London. Private boat in Greek isles. Long massage at a Four Seasons. That kind of thing but it’s not like we do this stuff every month.

Anonymous wrote:If your hhi is under 300k, do you sometimes do something like a tea at a beautiful hotel, a round of golf (if you golf, or whatever equivalent) at a local resort, a concert that costs $500/ticket...? I never do any of these things. I was at a gorgeous hotel last week just passing by and saw the tea and it looked like an experience I would enjoy, but I find it very hard spending $250+ on a single event over in one hour or two.

Anonymous wrote:Real question for you OP: when you see these experiences, do you imagine really enjoying them, or do you imagine taking a photo of yourself doing them and posting it online? Or telling other people about it later and them being impressed or envious?

This isn't a trick question, I don't know what your answer will be and it might be that you would genuinely enjoy the experience. And if so, you should do it now and then! Treat yourself. If it's important to you, you can save up money for that kind of stuff so it's set aside and doesnt' feel like it's impacting your bottom line.

But the reason I ask is because I've noticed this is also a cultural trend, to pay for expensive "luxury" experiences. It's become trendy to spend money on experiences instead of possessions. And as someone who has done some of these experiences, what I've discovered is that sometimes an expensive experience is no more satisfying than an expensive handbag or pair of shoes. Especially if you are just getting it because other people do, or you feel like you should.

Also, many of the vendors offering these experiences are just trying to bilk you. Because it's become trendy for UMC to pay for bespoke experiences, it's also become trendy for hotels, restaurants, and other hospitality services to put together "experiences" that allow them to charge 5x what they would for a regular meal or service because it's their "Deluxe Immersive Experience" or whatever. And often this is simply not worth it.

Just some thoughts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Life is short do it. I’ve done all the things you’ve listed but not in a performative or strivey way. There are bands we like and when they tour we will pay to see them. Certain sporting events too. Tea isn’t my thing locally but we did it in London. Private boat in Greek isles. Long massage at a Four Seasons. That kind of thing but it’s not like we do this stuff every month.

I think I just don't know how to get in that headspace at all, like I'd feel guilty. I feel less like that about buying tickets for a trip or a hotel room, dc purchases, but experiences for me? It's like I can't do it. Out of the things I listed the tea is really what I'd love.

Anonymous wrote:Real question for you OP: when you see these experiences, do you imagine really enjoying them, or do you imagine taking a photo of yourself doing them and posting it online? Or telling other people about it later and them being impressed or envious?

This isn't a trick question, I don't know what your answer will be and it might be that you would genuinely enjoy the experience. And if so, you should do it now and then! Treat yourself. If it's important to you, you can save up money for that kind of stuff so it's set aside and doesnt' feel like it's impacting your bottom line.

But the reason I ask is because I've noticed this is also a cultural trend, to pay for expensive "luxury" experiences. It's become trendy to spend money on experiences instead of possessions. And as someone who has done some of these experiences, what I've discovered is that sometimes an expensive experience is no more satisfying than an expensive handbag or pair of shoes. Especially if you are just getting it because other people do, or you feel like you should.

Also, many of the vendors offering these experiences are just trying to bilk you. Because it's become trendy for UMC to pay for bespoke experiences, it's also become trendy for hotels, restaurants, and other hospitality services to put together "experiences" that allow them to charge 5x what they would for a regular meal or service because it's their "Deluxe Immersive Experience" or whatever. And often this is simply not worth it.

Just some thoughts.

Anonymous wrote:Life is short do it. I’ve done all the things you’ve listed but not in a performative or strivey way. There are bands we like and when they tour we will pay to see them. Certain sporting events too. Tea isn’t my thing locally but we did it in London. Private boat in Greek isles. Long massage at a Four Seasons. That kind of thing but it’s not like we do this stuff every month.