I'm in my 30s.

Wow, didn't know this was normal and my expectations were too high. And I should probably stop telling my one friend Happy Anniversary.

Good to know! Thanks y'all.

No I recognize my own anniversary and that of my parents and DH's parents but not friends or siblings after year 1. (And by recognize, I mean I send them a text.)

Good heavens no. Even my DH sometimes forgets. 😂

Not their job to remember it

Anniversaries are for you and your spouse to celebrate. No one else. I do not expect a single person besides my husband to remember our anniversary.

Anonymous wrote:I forget even my own anniversary, OP. Anniversaries are not important. I make an effort for Holidays and birthdays.

Me again. I'm 46 and have been married for more than 20 years. I have a 21 and 15 year old. We're busy with other life happenings.

Also - some people's brains are just wired to remember dates: my mother is like this. She remembers a ton of phones numbers and event dates, even my childhood friends' birthdays, those that I lost touch with decades ago! But she understands that it's a quirk, and doesn't go about expecting others to remember her anniversary. Even if you remember, OP, please don't expect others to do so.

Anonymous wrote:Gosh no. You are going to struggle to keep friends with these types of expectations.

+1
And beyond other calendar event dates, an anniversary by definition is between the couple. No one cares about your anniversary other than you and your partner and that is how it is by its very structure.
OP, you must be young? If not, you have a bit of main-character syndrome.

OP, curious about your age?

I'm in my 40s, married 15 years, still friends with most of the people whose weddings I attended or was in back in my 20s and 30s.

Occasionally one of us will recall that the other just had or is about to have an anniversary, and we'll say "happy anniversary" and maybe talk about the number and how much time has passed. But I have literally never sent (or received) an anniversary card from one of my friends. We view wedding anniversaries as something personal you celebrate with your partner.

Also, once you and your friends start having kids, then you have kid birthdays. I'd much rather remember my friend's kid's birthday than their anniversary -- it matters more to the kid that you remember (and buy them a gift so they love you best of all their honorary aunties!) than to the parents that you remember their anniversary.

I forget even my own anniversary, OP. Anniversaries are not important. I make an effort for Holidays and birthdays.

Gosh no. You are going to struggle to keep friends with these types of expectations.

Anonymous wrote:After the first a year or two, my friends stopped sending the Happy Anniversary messages.

I feel some kind of way about it because I do send my one married friend a Happy Anniversary message every year.

I'm not expecting it from every guest of course, but you would think my bridesmaids would say something. I guess I'm just type A and put important dates on my calendar.

Lol I know they see it on Facebook memories because I see it every year when I log in. Even my family forgets to say it so I guess it's not just a friend thing. Every one is busy right? Lol oh well.

What is your experience?

Good grief, bridesmaid responsibilities end at the wedding, OP.

You need to let this go. No one cares about your anniversary. If anyone besides my husband remembered mine I’d be annoyed because I don’t want to feel obligated to remember theirs.
Also, grow up.

No. It would make me feel weird and pressured to remember theirs even though I could not care less.

I have a million married friends and the only ones whose anniversaries I remember are my sisters and my best friend but only because she got married on 7/7 so it’s easy to remember.

After the first a year or two, my friends stopped sending the Happy Anniversary messages.

I feel some kind of way about it because I do send my one married friend a Happy Anniversary message every year.

I'm not expecting it from every guest of course, but you would think my bridesmaids would say something. I guess I'm just type A and put important dates on my calendar.

Lol I know they see it on Facebook memories because I see it every year when I log in. Even my family forgets to say it so I guess it's not just a friend thing. Every one is busy right? Lol oh well.

What is your experience?