Anonymous wrote:I agree with the above. I’m shocked at how many therapists who brand themselves as co parenting experts know zero about abuse and abuse dynamics, etc.

I’m a couples and family therapist and they sometimes send me their hardest cases and it’s apparent they have zero understanding of narc abuse and how no one should be in any type of counseling when that is active. in divorce the therapist also needs to be able to see through everything and have a very in depth understanding of how these dynamics play out even post relationship/divorce etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the above. I’m shocked at how many therapists who brand themselves as co parenting experts know zero about abuse and abuse dynamics, etc.

I’m a couples and family therapist and they sometimes send me their hardest cases and it’s apparent they have zero understanding of narc abuse and how no one should be in any type of counseling when that is active. in divorce the therapist also needs to be able to see through everything and have a very in depth understanding of how these dynamics play out even post relationship/divorce etc.

A couple we are close to is getting divorced in a very nasty way and I'm shocked at how bad the therapist is.

Due to allegations from both sides, the lawyers and guardian ad litem have requested to speak to many of us who are friends and the guardian said at one point that we needed to "honor Larla's truth" (Larla being the child). This was after Larla told my children that her mom told her that I had accused her mom of doing drugs, which I never did. It was also after Larla told another child that her mom was Larla's dad's lawyer, which is also not true (she's not even a family law attorney). Obviously none of us know the real truth and which allegations are true, but I do know what I said and in my statement both to the attorney and the guardian I said I had never witnessed the mom doing drugs, which is absolutely true.

Anyway, watching people go through a divorce makes me glad I have a good marriage but also conscious of wanting to work hard to keep it that way. This conflict only ruins the kids, who had no part in this.

Anonymous wrote:Posted on special concerns but don’t worry, they’ll probably hire a custody evaluator and you’ll be assigned a therapist and you’ll have to think and say and do what you’re told.

All joking aside, you are looking for someone with experience in family systems or a parenting coordinator, but if you are high conflict there are probably big issues behind that like mental illness, coercive control, etc. that these people don’t have the experience or knowledge of those things thay they should.

I would focus on getting a settlement fast and getting the cleanest tightest parenting plan you can and googling “parallel parenting.” If you’re truly high-conflict, you’re not going to be coparenting.

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the above. I’m shocked at how many therapists who brand themselves as co parenting experts know zero about abuse and abuse dynamics, etc.

I’m a couples and family therapist and they sometimes send me their hardest cases and it’s apparent they have zero understanding of narc abuse and how no one should be in any type of counseling when that is active. in divorce the therapist also needs to be able to see through everything and have a very in depth understanding of how these dynamics play out even post relationship/divorce etc.