Anonymous wrote:This is the least of this family's issues. Funny how this works -- things are beyond financially unhealthy for years, and then it comes to a head over some tiny thing like $50 gifts for kids.

Curious what is unhealthy.

This is the least of this family's issues. Funny how this works -- things are beyond financially unhealthy for years, and then it comes to a head over some tiny thing like $50 gifts for kids.

How old are the kids and what do they like to do? Siblings #2 should be willing to spend quality time around the kids birthdays.

There is nothing right, normal or good about: #1 sending #2 $55k + a $100k lump sum.

Unless #1 has 10,000 kids, does it matter?

Why do you send your sibling money? If they need you sending them money, I would not expect them to send my kid money

#2 is a taker who feels poor and thrifty aka stingy.
#2 should acknowledge #1 kid birthdays even inexpensively with a handmade craft or card. #1:can do the same for #2 kid birthdays.

Fifty dollars isn't that much money these days. So yes, 2 should reciprocate and send it to 1's kids for birthdays.

Just petty.

I think $50 is a reasonable amount for someone who makes a "decent salary" so ideally sibling 2 would still give that much. If #1 were giving hundreds or super expensive gifts then it would be more understandable if 2 couldn't keep up.

Given the irresponsibility, financially and otherwise, of Sibling #2, Sibling #1 should send his own kid $50 and write in Sibling #2's name on the card. It's no different than if Sibling #2 did it because it is Sibling #1's money anyways.

#1 should do whatever they want and can afford but not less than #2, if anything would send more.

I don’t think it matters. Siblings should reciprocate kid gifts imo when possible but they don’t have to be the same format or cash value. It could be something silly/cute and a nice card. Or whatever.

#2 needs to find other ways to celebrate the kids' birthdays. Money is not their thing and should stay out of anything money related.

Middle aged siblings:

1. Wealthy, a saver, sends money to #2 annually totaling about $55k + a $100k lump sum payment 3 yrs ago.

2. Not good with money, makes a decent salary, gratefully accepts money from #1.

If #1 sends $50 for each of #2 kids’ bdays, should #2 send $50 for #1 kids’ bdays or less bc #2 has less money?