Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m able to see my adult children’s EOBs but they are very non-descript and I can’t tell what they’ve been seen for. I can see the provider name and just a generic description like lab or exam. I can’t see the actual diagnostic or procedure code. Of course, your ex could always search for the doctor to see if they’re a mental health provider if that’s the concern.

Not a mental health concern. He has his own mental health concerns and is trying to deflect attention from that and suggest that a surgery and a sports injury I had years ago are impairing my physical health and ability to perform caregiving tasks, so therefore he should have more custody. I need to do basic follow up appointments at the practices that were the gatekeepers for those procedures and courses of treatment but I’m afraid to even call them.

Obviously I will share all my full medical records up front with a judge but in the meantime I don’t want to create situations that put further put me on the defensive or can be twisted even if it ultimately has a neutral explanation. It’s expensive and exhausting.

I’ll call the insurer again tomorrow.

what does your lawyer think?

Asking because I think ex looks more insane in front of the judge for making an issue of that, and you receiving followup treatment could be an argument in your (similar to how ex would be better off acknowledging amd treating his mental illness, and yours has far less stigma).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m able to see my adult children’s EOBs but they are very non-descript and I can’t tell what they’ve been seen for. I can see the provider name and just a generic description like lab or exam. I can’t see the actual diagnostic or procedure code. Of course, your ex could always search for the doctor to see if they’re a mental health provider if that’s the concern.

Not a mental health concern. He has his own mental health concerns and is trying to deflect attention from that and suggest that a surgery and a sports injury I had years ago are impairing my physical health and ability to perform caregiving tasks, so therefore he should have more custody. I need to do basic follow up appointments at the practices that were the gatekeepers for those procedures and courses of treatment but I’m afraid to even call them.

Obviously I will share all my full medical records up front with a judge but in the meantime I don’t want to create situations that put further put me on the defensive or can be twisted even if it ultimately has a neutral explanation. It’s expensive and exhausting.

I’ll call the insurer again tomorrow.

what does your lawyer think?

I’ve switched insurances this year and I can see DH’s and college kid’s EOBs with all the details. With previous plans, I could not.

Anonymous wrote:He has a right to see his child’s medical. You need to get your own insurance.

Can’t you read? Op isn’t denying him access to his child’s medical records. She just doesn’t want her ex to see the details of her own medical treatment because he’s a jerk who might use it against her.

He has a right to see his child’s medical. You need to get your own insurance.

Anonymous wrote:I’m able to see my adult children’s EOBs but they are very non-descript and I can’t tell what they’ve been seen for. I can see the provider name and just a generic description like lab or exam. I can’t see the actual diagnostic or procedure code. Of course, your ex could always search for the doctor to see if they’re a mental health provider if that’s the concern.

Not a mental health concern. He has his own mental health concerns and is trying to deflect attention from that and suggest that a surgery and a sports injury I had years ago are impairing my physical health and ability to perform caregiving tasks, so therefore he should have more custody. I need to do basic follow up appointments at the practices that were the gatekeepers for those procedures and courses of treatment but I’m afraid to even call them.

Obviously I will share all my full medical records up front with a judge but in the meantime I don’t want to create situations that put further put me on the defensive or can be twisted even if it ultimately has a neutral explanation. It’s expensive and exhausting.

I’ll call the insurer again tomorrow.

I’m able to see my adult children’s EOBs but they are very non-descript and I can’t tell what they’ve been seen for. I can see the provider name and just a generic description like lab or exam. I can’t see the actual diagnostic or procedure code. Of course, your ex could always search for the doctor to see if they’re a mental health provider if that’s the concern.

We are on my DH’s health insurance and he cannot see my EOBs online. We can both see the kids’ EOBs online but neither of us can see our 18 year old kid’s. He can see anything that comes in the mail of course.

We have the federal employees BCBS plan fwiw.

Anonymous wrote:I am on DH policy. He can see my claims and EOBs. I can only see mine. Paper or online. Actually I see his too because he dgaf and has me do all the insurance stuff, lol.

Thanks for sharing this. People on the phone and my friends have insisted there’s no way DH can see my EOBs but I know he can so now I feel validated and less crazy.

I am on DH policy. He can see my claims and EOBs. I can only see mine. Paper or online. Actually I see his too because he dgaf and has me do all the insurance stuff, lol.

OP here again. This article is old but explains my concerns well. It sounds like some states have recognized it as an issue and introduced legislation to correct it:

https://ctmirror.org/2019/04/08/keeping-health-insurance-statements-private/

Anonymous wrote:He can only see them if mailed. If online, they are only available to the patient, unless under 18. That's according to the privacy rules.

So that’s what I initially hoped, but according to my insurer or their customer service agent that is only true for medical records and detailed, final billing statements. They said that my EOBs are available online to the subscriber.

And yes, I can see my child’s statement but not my DH’s.

He can only see them if mailed. If online, they are only available to the patient, unless under 18. That's according to the privacy rules.

First, talk to your lawyer about your weaponization fears and see what they suggest. You absolutely should not postpone care for those reasons.

If your lawyer says separation of EOBs is possible ask them for specifics. Maybe a three way call or a letter to insurance is needed.

Or maybe you are stuck.

Can't he see his children's EOBs too?

I hope someone is on here who’s always in the weeds with health insurance stuff and might happen to have a fast answer.

DH filed for divorce. I am insured under his employer-sponsored healthcare plan. I am a “dependent” on the insurance. As a subscriber, he can see EOB statements for any providers or treatment that my DC and I visit/receive. As an adult parent, I can see EOB statements for any providers or treatment that my minor DC receives.

However, since I am his “dependent” in the health insurance since, my DH can view my EOB statements, some of which make it very clear what I would be getting treated for or what provider I’m seeing.

He has been very aggressive and engaged in post-separation legal abuse, and I’m concerned that even minor health stuff will be twisted and used against me.

I can’t seem to get through to my health insurer that I want to restrict his access to my EOB statements and other information. My attorney insists this is possible, the Internet insists it’s possible, but my insurer says it’s not.

Is there a process or magic phrase I can use to make this happen? Right now I am postponing regular healthcare for fear that any information will be weaponized later.