Anonymous
02/20/2026 11:44
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Not all of this is snobbiness, per se, but when we were looking for K two things stood out for me:
• Trinity was the only school that made no effort to even pretend like they were interested in your interest in them . . . no sign-ins at open houses, and they would send many applications back without considering them.
• The CGPS admissions director was obnoxious, going on and on about how "hot" the school was and openly courting the couple with the 60-something sugar daddy and his logo-covered wife.
As for HS, we found almost all of the schools we toured to be welcoming and respectful of the feelings of young teens going through a stressful process. The exception was Fieldston . . . for whatever reason, it felt like they were disorganized, detached, and kind of phoning everything in.
TBF, a lot of the TT schools keep parents at a distance during the application process. Once your kiddo’s accepted, the community opens up a lot more. Our experience with Dalton was kind of like that: at first, of all the schools we toured Dalton felt the most impersonal and disinterested. Then, pretty much immediately after kiddo’s acceptance, which includes the acceptance letter, they immediately became incredibly warm and helpful and lovely. It’s necessary for them to keep a healthy wall of separation between the school and prospective parents.
I do agree that schools tend to not be super warm and loving until they accept you. But we applied to Dalton last year (as a very late summer bday, knowing my child may be too young) and interviewed with the head of admissions. She spoke to us with such a condescending tone about their educational philosophy (I am an educator myself) like we were 5. She was so dismissive of us right off the bat. Because of that we didn't even bother to apply to Dalton for this past round. My child got in to a TT SS and we are happy.
Anonymous
02/20/2026 11:20
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Anonymous wrote:Not all of this is snobbiness, per se, but when we were looking for K two things stood out for me:
• Trinity was the only school that made no effort to even pretend like they were interested in your interest in them . . . no sign-ins at open houses, and they would send many applications back without considering them.
• The CGPS admissions director was obnoxious, going on and on about how "hot" the school was and openly courting the couple with the 60-something sugar daddy and his logo-covered wife.
As for HS, we found almost all of the schools we toured to be welcoming and respectful of the feelings of young teens going through a stressful process. The exception was Fieldston . . . for whatever reason, it felt like they were disorganized, detached, and kind of phoning everything in.
TBF, a lot of the TT schools keep parents at a distance during the application process. Once your kiddo’s accepted, the community opens up a lot more. Our experience with Dalton was kind of like that: at first, of all the schools we toured Dalton felt the most impersonal and disinterested. Then, pretty much immediately after kiddo’s acceptance, which includes the acceptance letter, they immediately became incredibly warm and helpful and lovely. It’s necessary for them to keep a healthy wall of separation between the school and prospective parents.
Anonymous
02/20/2026 08:46
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Not all of this is snobbiness, per se, but when we were looking for K two things stood out for me:
• Trinity was the only school that made no effort to even pretend like they were interested in your interest in them . . . no sign-ins at open houses, and they would send many applications back without considering them.
• The CGPS admissions director was obnoxious, going on and on about how "hot" the school was and openly courting the couple with the 60-something sugar daddy and his logo-covered wife.
As for HS, we found almost all of the schools we toured to be welcoming and respectful of the feelings of young teens going through a stressful process. The exception was Fieldston . . . for whatever reason, it felt like they were disorganized, detached, and kind of phoning everything in.
• Trinity was the only school that made no effort to even pretend like they were interested in your interest in them . . . no sign-ins at open houses, and they would send many applications back without considering them.
• The CGPS admissions director was obnoxious, going on and on about how "hot" the school was and openly courting the couple with the 60-something sugar daddy and his logo-covered wife.
As for HS, we found almost all of the schools we toured to be welcoming and respectful of the feelings of young teens going through a stressful process. The exception was Fieldston . . . for whatever reason, it felt like they were disorganized, detached, and kind of phoning everything in.
Anonymous
02/20/2026 08:33
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Riverdale felt snobby and clique-y
Anonymous
02/20/2026 07:31
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
My daughter loved Friends Seminary. This is not current. We did not find it snobby/elitist.
Downtown schools are a blessing in this regard.
Downtown schools are a blessing in this regard.
Anonymous
02/20/2026 07:20
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
regis least snobby, so much so that people don't consider it a real private school
Anonymous
02/20/2026 00:02
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Trinity- not snobby but very intense
Dalton- more celeb presence which can read elitist or less approachable
Spence and Buckley- visibly very, very fancy.
CGPS- insufferable displays of wealth
Riverdale- similar to CGPS but less on display because of geography
Dalton- more celeb presence which can read elitist or less approachable
Spence and Buckley- visibly very, very fancy.
CGPS- insufferable displays of wealth
Riverdale- similar to CGPS but less on display because of geography
Anonymous
02/19/2026 23:55
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:The thread in the main private school thread made me think of this for NYC privates.
Thoughts?
Trinity seemed the most snobby to me, then Spence and Dalton.
Same here. I actually thought HM felt pretty normal (at least for a TT).
Anonymous
02/19/2026 23:18
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Anonymous wrote:The thread in the main private school thread made me think of this for NYC privates.
Thoughts?
Trinity seemed the most snobby to me, then Spence and Dalton.
Anonymous
02/19/2026 23:12
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
I found HM less snobby than I thought. Spence was definitely snobby.
Anonymous
02/19/2026 22:57
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Trevor day gave me down to earth, not snobby.
Anonymous
02/19/2026 22:22
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
My first impression of Horace Mann sitting with my kid in the admissions waiting room was "my god these people are snobby"
Anonymous
02/19/2026 22:18
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
I think Dalton is less snobby than most. Surprisingly, I also think Trinity is not that snobby.
Spence and Collegiate definitely elitist
Spence and Collegiate definitely elitist
Anonymous
02/19/2026 22:16
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
Honestly, among NYC TT/2T schools at least I think the answer to "most elitist" is "all of them"; even the ones that don't send 1/3 of their graduates to Ivies tend to be incredibly full of themselves. (as evidenced by basically every TT/2T thread in this forum)
There are some lower-tier schools that are a bit more down-to-earth (though not all of them), but anytime you're talking about a school that costs $70k/year and rejects 80%+ of applicants, it's going to be pretty gosh-darn snobby.
There are some lower-tier schools that are a bit more down-to-earth (though not all of them), but anytime you're talking about a school that costs $70k/year and rejects 80%+ of applicants, it's going to be pretty gosh-darn snobby.
Anonymous
02/19/2026 21:05
Subject: Most and least snobby/elitist privates
The thread in the main private school thread made me think of this for NYC privates.
Thoughts?
Thoughts?