Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Met attorney to begin divorce proceedings, he was pretty convinced that i will not be eligible for alimony even though i make less than half of him, have a 28 year marriage, chronic health conditions, PLUS he is having a work place affair. Is the attorney being realistic? Would mediation help as STBX keeps denying affair?

No one cares about the affair. BTDT. That doesn't move the needle in your favor. You make less than half, but are you earning six figures? If so that will impact maintenance for sure but zero maintenance seems unreasonable. Talk to several attorneys. Good luck!

I did tell the attorney, they mentioned proposing rehabilitative alimony for a few years.. and yes, I make six figures-

Anonymous wrote:I don't think this is the attorney for you.

I'm in VA, had a 20 year marriage, and have sizable lifetime alimony.

Personally I would be fighting for lifetime but willing to take half the length of the marriage if he was going to fight me on it. No alimony wouldn't be on the table unless he was giving me a bunch of assets up front to make up for it.

Are you working? I am in MD and working, is this why?

I don't think this is the attorney for you.

I'm in VA, had a 20 year marriage, and have sizable lifetime alimony.

Personally I would be fighting for lifetime but willing to take half the length of the marriage if he was going to fight me on it. No alimony wouldn't be on the table unless he was giving me a bunch of assets up front to make up for it.

Anonymous wrote:Met attorney to begin divorce proceedings, he was pretty convinced that i will not be eligible for alimony even though i make less than half of him, have a 28 year marriage, chronic health conditions, PLUS he is having a work place affair. Is the attorney being realistic? Would mediation help as STBX keeps denying affair?

No one cares about the affair. BTDT. That doesn't move the needle in your favor. You make less than half, but are you earning six figures? If so that will impact maintenance for sure but zero maintenance seems unreasonable. Talk to several attorneys. Good luck!

The affair is likely meaningless as a legal matter.

I would think if we went through a mediator, they would be better positioned to get it enforced. I want to use the affair card, what’s the best way to go about it?

Anonymous wrote:What is the law in your state and how much do you make?

Maryland is supposed to be equitable division state and he makes more than twice of me-

The attorney says they typically see the courts leaning towards 50-50!

Anonymous wrote:Met attorney to begin divorce proceedings, he was pretty convinced that i will not be eligible for alimony even though i make less than half of him, have a 28 year marriage, chronic health conditions, PLUS he is having a work place affair. Is the attorney being realistic? Would mediation help as STBX keeps denying affair?

Could you get a greater than 50% division of the assets instead alimony? My friend got a settlement like this. Her husband makes 3x her income and she took 65% of the assets and did not seek alimony. A bird in hand is worth 2 in the bush.

Another consult. Similar situation. One attorney told me that I should expect to get noting and should get a job the next day or else. I talked to several others and they had very different perspectives than that. The one I hired said that he couldn’t tell me exactly what I could get, but laid out best case and worst case scenarios and was honest that our strategy would be complicated and would need to adjust as we went along.

Anyone who has an answer during an initial consult is going to be lazy and take a boilerplate approach to your case so they can maintain a higher client load, and then they’re going to bill you to death. You need someone thoughtful who’s willing to look at this from many possible angles before choosing the best approach.

Get another consult.

Why does the attorney think those factors will not positively influence you getting alimony? Like, why did THEY say that stuff doesn't matter?

What is the law in your state and how much do you make?

That’s ridiculous. Maybe consult another attorney.

Met attorney to begin divorce proceedings, he was pretty convinced that i will not be eligible for alimony even though i make less than half of him, have a 28 year marriage, chronic health conditions, PLUS he is having a work place affair. Is the attorney being realistic? Would mediation help as STBX keeps denying affair?