Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:58
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
OP what is it you want them to learn at the "real job" that isn't about hours in a chair?
Your performance review should be focused on their actual deficits.
What is it that they don't know how to do? Your boss didn't tell you to go to a big four to work more hours. They wanted you to go learn something. So what was it?
Your focus on work schedules and disparaging them undercuts your only valid argument, which is they need skills to move up that you don't have the ability to teach them in house.
Your performance review should be focused on their actual deficits.
What is it that they don't know how to do? Your boss didn't tell you to go to a big four to work more hours. They wanted you to go learn something. So what was it?
Your focus on work schedules and disparaging them undercuts your only valid argument, which is they need skills to move up that you don't have the ability to teach them in house.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:58
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
Look OP raised a lot of hackles. But there is some validity.
It's hard if not impossible to be an autodidact about everything working in isolation with little face to face peer interaction, and possibly not even much virtually.
Judgement. Nuance. Context.
Investment in employees.
It's hard if not impossible to be an autodidact about everything working in isolation with little face to face peer interaction, and possibly not even much virtually.
Judgement. Nuance. Context.
Investment in employees.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:53
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
OP is the sort of autistic person who gives other autistic people a bad name. He hurts others and doesn't even realize it.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:52
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
Get a real staff. Why can't you attract better workers?
Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:44
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
Anonymous wrote:Was I wrong in saying this in a performance review?
Apparently HR flagged me off the record I am "expecting too much my staff" and my expectations are different their expectations.
Two people who work in my dept (which I like and think they have potential) both around 36-38 add very little value, clock watchers and work at a certain DC Govt type pace and are not critical thinkers. But both expressed interest in what they need to do to move up.
Looking at their resumes since college graduation around 2010 they both took BS jobs in small places with easy work life balance, and then went full remote in 2020 and now hybrid just two days a week in office in a place with no set in person days so on average at best 40 percent of company even at work on their two days. Both in my opinion are operating at knowledge level of a 23-24 year old two to three years out of school if they graduated and went straight to full time five days a week in office at a JP Morgan, Goldman, Google, Microsoft, Capital One, Fannie Mae or Big 4 type company.
I was being honest. I cant teach these two staff at 36-38 a decade of knowledge and their work ethic is horrible as not being in the office since 2020 is six years now. And pre that they had little punch the clock cubical jobs.
I was being honest they should go somewhere else, find a in person job. Large company name brand company with mentorship model and training and do the 2-3 years and if they want then come back as a VP or even SVP my company.
Apparently I shocked them. Was I wrong? Best advice I ever got was 30 years years ago I joined Finance dept at a major bank (HSBC) apparently I was way in over my head. The Controller took me aside and said look you are way behind and you dont know what you are doing but I believe in you. But we don't have time or resources to catch you up. You should go to a Big 4 firm, work your butt off, get the training, do a few years and come back. Guess what I did that.
Was I wrong to basically tell them to get a real job? Or is it just a thing that should not be said even if true. One even admitted he gets a job, stays 2-3 years does a lateral for a raise. He never really learned any company. And he is at same level the last decade. He has the job title of a 24 year old at 38. Or maybe he has a low IQ or limitations or just lazy? I guess I will never know. I am banned from offering actual advice.
I'm not sure anyone as illiterate as you appear to be should be lecturing others on professionalism. Wow.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:42
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
I really hope you're fired.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:41
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
J1/J2/J3- you know you were wrong. They have a real job, working for you. Write up their performance in a way that talks about what they did or did not do factually and quantitively.
A good manager would have put them on a PIP already if they needed it.
A good manager would have put them on a PIP already if they needed it.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:40
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
You went about this all wrong and probably need more management training. Are you relatively new to managing these people?
I think there’s a way to constructively convey much of what you said but it sounds like you did not do that at all. I’m not sure if it would make it worse or better but there might be a way to sit down with them and say — look I’m sorry if what I said came off wrong, I want to try to express this better. But you’ll definitely need guidance from HR and more experienced managers on how to say this. It’s basically — I think you have a lot of potential but unfortjnately you just haven’t gotten the time on task to really bring your skills to the next level and develop your potential. If that’s something you’re interested in, here are some ways I think you can do that….
I think there’s a way to constructively convey much of what you said but it sounds like you did not do that at all. I’m not sure if it would make it worse or better but there might be a way to sit down with them and say — look I’m sorry if what I said came off wrong, I want to try to express this better. But you’ll definitely need guidance from HR and more experienced managers on how to say this. It’s basically — I think you have a lot of potential but unfortjnately you just haven’t gotten the time on task to really bring your skills to the next level and develop your potential. If that’s something you’re interested in, here are some ways I think you can do that….
Anonymous
02/10/2026 10:34
Subject: Re:I told my staff to get a Real Job
Anonymous wrote:You sound incredibly full of yourself. Yes, of course you were wrong but hopefuly they'll be much better off working for someone else.
You mean "employed elsewhere" The issue is they have never actually "worked" To add to it as I can no longer discuss this with them. I mentioned if you come to work lets say 8am to 430 pm two day a week. (a lot come in early to beat traffice) since office meetings only normally take place betwee 9am and 4 pm and you are taking a 30 minute lunch that leaves you 6.5 hours a day twice a week to actually meet with people and gain knowledge. So 13 hours a week. with vacations, holidays that is only around 600 hours a year. in person to learn
By comparision in same job at same level as they are I worked 2,500 hours a year in person around 4x the time of inperson to learn. So I was only at that level for around 1/4 the time as to master levels it talks around 2,500 hours junion role, 5,000 hours the next level, and around 7,500 hours the level afterward.
The brain is a funny thing knowledge drops out over time so you need to learn much more than you forget. I had part time jobs in college 20 hours a week at a two banks. I never really could learn the jobs as I was not there enought as the full time people and outside interests and school main focus.
So unless you are there 50 hours a week in person at least one point in your career with really smart people, in a company with good training, mentorship, apprentiship programs at least once in your life you never really fully understand the industry or job you are doing.
They should do this then come back and rest on past achievements. In fact everyone should work at a "real" job at some point
Then again Giant supermarket is largest employer in MoCo so most dont get the chance
Anonymous
02/10/2026 09:51
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:j123, is that you?
yes you were wrong.
It’s definitely him.
Half his rant was about being in office, jot about their actual work performance at all.
Finance 30 years ago? What a gravy train for white men.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 09:47
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
Anonymous wrote:j123, is that you?
yes you were wrong.
It’s definitely him.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 09:43
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
j123, is that you?
yes you were wrong.
yes you were wrong.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 09:36
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
a) nothing in a performance review should shock anyone. You should be giving periodic informal feedback.
b) no, "go somewhere else" is not appropriate feedback on how someone can improve at your company/agency.
b) no, "go somewhere else" is not appropriate feedback on how someone can improve at your company/agency.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 09:36
Subject: Re:I told my staff to get a Real Job
You sound incredibly full of yourself. Yes, of course you were wrong but hopefuly they'll be much better off working for someone else.
Anonymous
02/10/2026 09:34
Subject: I told my staff to get a Real Job
Was I wrong in saying this in a performance review?
Apparently HR flagged me off the record I am "expecting too much my staff" and my expectations are different their expectations.
Two people who work in my dept (which I like and think they have potential) both around 36-38 add very little value, clock watchers and work at a certain DC Govt type pace and are not critical thinkers. But both expressed interest in what they need to do to move up.
Looking at their resumes since college graduation around 2010 they both took BS jobs in small places with easy work life balance, and then went full remote in 2020 and now hybrid just two days a week in office in a place with no set in person days so on average at best 40 percent of company even at work on their two days. Both in my opinion are operating at knowledge level of a 23-24 year old two to three years out of school if they graduated and went straight to full time five days a week in office at a JP Morgan, Goldman, Google, Microsoft, Capital One, Fannie Mae or Big 4 type company.
I was being honest. I cant teach these two staff at 36-38 a decade of knowledge and their work ethic is horrible as not being in the office since 2020 is six years now. And pre that they had little punch the clock cubical jobs.
I was being honest they should go somewhere else, find a in person job. Large company name brand company with mentorship model and training and do the 2-3 years and if they want then come back as a VP or even SVP my company.
Apparently I shocked them. Was I wrong? Best advice I ever got was 30 years years ago I joined Finance dept at a major bank (HSBC) apparently I was way in over my head. The Controller took me aside and said look you are way behind and you dont know what you are doing but I believe in you. But we don't have time or resources to catch you up. You should go to a Big 4 firm, work your butt off, get the training, do a few years and come back. Guess what I did that.
Was I wrong to basically tell them to get a real job? Or is it just a thing that should not be said even if true. One even admitted he gets a job, stays 2-3 years does a lateral for a raise. He never really learned any company. And he is at same level the last decade. He has the job title of a 24 year old at 38. Or maybe he has a low IQ or limitations or just lazy? I guess I will never know. I am banned from offering actual advice.
Apparently HR flagged me off the record I am "expecting too much my staff" and my expectations are different their expectations.
Two people who work in my dept (which I like and think they have potential) both around 36-38 add very little value, clock watchers and work at a certain DC Govt type pace and are not critical thinkers. But both expressed interest in what they need to do to move up.
Looking at their resumes since college graduation around 2010 they both took BS jobs in small places with easy work life balance, and then went full remote in 2020 and now hybrid just two days a week in office in a place with no set in person days so on average at best 40 percent of company even at work on their two days. Both in my opinion are operating at knowledge level of a 23-24 year old two to three years out of school if they graduated and went straight to full time five days a week in office at a JP Morgan, Goldman, Google, Microsoft, Capital One, Fannie Mae or Big 4 type company.
I was being honest. I cant teach these two staff at 36-38 a decade of knowledge and their work ethic is horrible as not being in the office since 2020 is six years now. And pre that they had little punch the clock cubical jobs.
I was being honest they should go somewhere else, find a in person job. Large company name brand company with mentorship model and training and do the 2-3 years and if they want then come back as a VP or even SVP my company.
Apparently I shocked them. Was I wrong? Best advice I ever got was 30 years years ago I joined Finance dept at a major bank (HSBC) apparently I was way in over my head. The Controller took me aside and said look you are way behind and you dont know what you are doing but I believe in you. But we don't have time or resources to catch you up. You should go to a Big 4 firm, work your butt off, get the training, do a few years and come back. Guess what I did that.
Was I wrong to basically tell them to get a real job? Or is it just a thing that should not be said even if true. One even admitted he gets a job, stays 2-3 years does a lateral for a raise. He never really learned any company. And he is at same level the last decade. He has the job title of a 24 year old at 38. Or maybe he has a low IQ or limitations or just lazy? I guess I will never know. I am banned from offering actual advice.