Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:let me tell you my crazy story with my ex-gf. She said that ex-H was verbally abusive, mean and she was in a trauma bond due to getting married in her teens. Stayed married for 20+ years due to kids and can't stand her ex-H and now kids are adults. She was living in her own apartment but go and stay at her ex-H place during the week for the dogs because he worked out of town and only comes down during the weekend. In addition, she told me that she was fully divorced but wasn't. For me, lying about divorce wasn't the main issue but still staying connected and going into ex-H house when they hate each other and he didn't give her anything in the divorce. Finally, I ended it and I wish people are more honest with what they are looking for and also finish their healing before moving into a new relationship.

woah!!! I wonder why she is having so many problems in every relationship. Teen mom!! no thank you.

good riddance, PP. She is one of those broken women that never cares about anyone else except herself.

Anonymous wrote:let me tell you my crazy story with my ex-gf. She said that ex-H was verbally abusive, mean and she was in a trauma bond due to getting married in her teens. Stayed married for 20+ years due to kids and can't stand her ex-H and now kids are adults. She was living in her own apartment but go and stay at her ex-H place during the week for the dogs because he worked out of town and only comes down during the weekend. In addition, she told me that she was fully divorced but wasn't. For me, lying about divorce wasn't the main issue but still staying connected and going into ex-H house when they hate each other and he didn't give her anything in the divorce. Finally, I ended it and I wish people are more honest with what they are looking for and also finish their healing before moving into a new relationship.

woah!!! I wonder why she is having so many problems in every relationship. Teen mom!! no thank you.

Anonymous wrote:No need to be friends. I wouldn't even know if he died. He is a broken person and I'm not there to to fix it or be a punching bag.
I think most people have left him. He has cats.

This is so true. Out of mind and sight, once done and there is no point of remunerating on the memories. They screwed up big time and will probably never get someone like you.

Anonymous wrote:If kids are involved, do you ever reach a point where you are friendly/friends with your Ex-except when abuse was involved?what other reasons would keep you from being friendly even if you wanted to?

Civil? Yes. Friendly? No.

let me tell you my crazy story with my ex-gf. She said that ex-H was verbally abusive, mean and she was in a trauma bond due to getting married in her teens. Stayed married for 20+ years due to kids and can't stand her ex-H and now kids are adults. She was living in her own apartment but go and stay at her ex-H place during the week for the dogs because he worked out of town and only comes down during the weekend. In addition, she told me that she was fully divorced but wasn't. For me, lying about divorce wasn't the main issue but still staying connected and going into ex-H house when they hate each other and he didn't give her anything in the divorce. Finally, I ended it and I wish people are more honest with what they are looking for and also finish their healing before moving into a new relationship.

Anonymous wrote:My BF and her x are best buddies

They had four kids in four years they had great sex not a good marriage

They are still friends and have remarried and they all live in walking distance of each other for the kids it’s pretty great

do you think they still smash now and then? This is really weird.

Having an ex who is very much in the picture is relationship baggage — especially if the ex doesn’t do anything useful/necessary to make your life easier. Why do you think widowers are considered such hot commodities?

Anonymous wrote:If kids are involved, do you ever reach a point where you are friendly/friends with your Ex-except when abuse was involved?what other reasons would keep you from being friendly even if you wanted to?

I mean, a million things. I'm not in that situation but I know plenty of divorced people with kids. An affair can be hard to come back from. Sometimes one or both parties is too selfish and/or immature to put their kids first so they refuse to get along with their ex. Sometimes one of the parents has a mental illness. Sometimes the new partner of one of the parents tanks the relationship. I could go on and on. What's the point? What are you looking for?

No need to be friends. I wouldn't even know if he died. He is a broken person and I'm not there to to fix it or be a punching bag.
I think most people have left him. He has cats.

I have 2 xHs. I’m pretty good friends with both.

My first xH is one of my best friends ever, we should have just stayed friends and not gotten into a relationship. We still get together and have long conversations, I don’t think anyone else “gets” each of us the way we do. We would have made much better BFFs.

XH2 was more the kind of friend who you don’t have a super in depth personal connection to, but you have things in common so hang out. We were hiking buddies first and should have stayed that way. Not nearly as close with him as xH1, but we communicate super well for our child and test each other memes a few times a month.

For reference, marriages split up bc xH1 was verbally abusive and xH2 cheated. I don’t really blame either. I think they liked me as a friend/person (and there’s that terrible marriage advice out there to “marry your best friend!”) and liked sleeping with me, but ultimately didn’t want to really be married to me. That unhappiness manifested as xH1 trying to bully me into changing into his dream girl, and xH2 trying to find his dream girl somewhere else.

I was with my XH for almost 20 years. We have no relationship. Kids are grown so there’s no need to. He’s just someone that I used to know.

I doubt things will ever be more than cordial.

My BF and her x are best buddies

They had four kids in four years they had great sex not a good marriage

They are still friends and have remarried and they all live in walking distance of each other for the kids it’s pretty great

Yes after about 10 years post divorce and once he moved far away. Now I send him pictures and updates to remind him to call.

If kids are involved, do you ever reach a point where you are friendly/friends with your Ex-except when abuse was involved?what other reasons would keep you from being friendly even if you wanted to?