Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 23:50     Subject: DH always grumpy
Mine was like this. He was checked out. He had an affair. I left him. We're all better off divorced. My sons resent him though because they know I was doing all the work to keep it together for so long.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 23:47     Subject: DH always grumpy
Anonymous wrote:Guy here. Late 40s, 3 kids, married and successful at work. Happily married.

Life and work can be extremely, extremely stressful for men / breadwinners. It can feel like the world is on our shoulders. And typically, there is no real understanding of the pressure we face at home.

This may be what's going on.



Why do you assume he's a breadwinner?
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 23:38     Subject: DH always grumpy
Guy here. Late 40s, 3 kids, married and successful at work. Happily married.

Life and work can be extremely, extremely stressful for men / breadwinners. It can feel like the world is on our shoulders. And typically, there is no real understanding of the pressure we face at home.

This may be what's going on.

Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 22:43     Subject: DH always grumpy
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Have you asked him?


He says “sorry I wasn’t trying to be angry”


Interesting
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 22:42     Subject: DH always grumpy
Anonymous wrote:Maybe he doesn’t feel appreciated so he is always in a heightened emotional state.


Exactly. You need to stoke his ego more and praise him for what we he does manage to do for the family. More frequent sex will help too OP!
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 18:10     Subject: DH always grumpy
Anonymous wrote:Have you asked him?


He says “sorry I wasn’t trying to be angry”
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 18:02     Subject: DH always grumpy
Have you asked him?
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 17:51     Subject: DH always grumpy
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH is always grumpy. The kids agree. We aren't scared of him or anything but the moodiness is getting OLD. He is late 40s. If he has to do chores, help with schoolwork, run errands, etc, it is always met with a baby tantrum, stomps or overall grumpiness. I do think he has ADHD, but not sure what else is going on. He has always been like this. I don't want a divorce but our house is so much calmer and well run when he is not home. Anyone overcome this and can give advice?


Tell him to take more long business trips, visit his parents more, and work more. Does he at least have a full time job?



He has a very good job but he doesn't like it.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 17:50     Subject: DH always grumpy
Anonymous wrote:Mine became always grumpy and then one day I was served divorce papers without a warning.

I’ve been searching for the answer to your question ever since and honestly I think I’ll die still wondering why he turned so grumpy.


This is my fear. He is high and low though - either happy and hyper or moody.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 17:03     Subject: DH always grumpy
Mine became always grumpy and then one day I was served divorce papers without a warning.

I’ve been searching for the answer to your question ever since and honestly I think I’ll die still wondering why he turned so grumpy.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 16:46     Subject: DH always grumpy
Could be depression. Men are more likely to have irritability and low level anger as their depressed mood state.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 16:44     Subject: DH always grumpy
Anonymous wrote:DH is always grumpy. The kids agree. We aren't scared of him or anything but the moodiness is getting OLD. He is late 40s. If he has to do chores, help with schoolwork, run errands, etc, it is always met with a baby tantrum, stomps or overall grumpiness. I do think he has ADHD, but not sure what else is going on. He has always been like this. I don't want a divorce but our house is so much calmer and well run when he is not home. Anyone overcome this and can give advice?


Tell him to take more long business trips, visit his parents more, and work more. Does he at least have a full time job?
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 16:19     Subject: DH always grumpy
Maybe he doesn’t feel appreciated so he is always in a heightened emotional state.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 16:11     Subject: DH always grumpy

You married that man and started a family knowing this about him.

If he doesn’t want to get evaluated for an underlying issue that’s causing the mood swings .. Deal or Divorce
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2026 15:33     Subject: DH always grumpy
DH is always grumpy. The kids agree. We aren't scared of him or anything but the moodiness is getting OLD. He is late 40s. If he has to do chores, help with schoolwork, run errands, etc, it is always met with a baby tantrum, stomps or overall grumpiness. I do think he has ADHD, but not sure what else is going on. He has always been like this. I don't want a divorce but our house is so much calmer and well run when he is not home. Anyone overcome this and can give advice?