Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m genuinely curious—does getting ahead really help?

What does getting ahead really mean?

It means you never walk into any class needing to rely on the classroom instruction. You could get an A on the final day one. More importantly, you never trust the US public school system to teach math or science. You learn it outside the system so that at higher levels you don’t struggle with gaps.

In the Bay Area, it is not uncommon for kids to start taking DE courses in 8th grade and have their GE, and DE major prerequisite courses complete with straight As along with the APs in high school to get the most rigorous check box by the end of junior year.

It also means that kids in public are competing with kids who have a second set of credentials. As it’s low cost to do this, they don’t trigger the pay to privilege box that other programs signal.

The problem with those Bay Area cram schools is that they’re not really teaching the material. They’re helping kids get high test scores by drilling them on old exams they’ve gotten from different schools. That’s basically another version of pay-to-play.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Korea is going to implode. They already have the lowest birth rate in the world. It's a fantastic place to visit and live if you don't have kids. But, the "cram" school in the US and the US education in general is a lot easier than in Korea. That's one of the reasons why people want to send their kids here.

Yes, they are importing some of their way of life here, but in some ways, it's no different than parents who push their kids to excel in sports in hopes for an athletic scholarship such that the kids are stressed (physically, too) and get little sleep. Same coin, different sides.

-Korean American

Great point. There’s no single “American” approach to educational priorities.

Different parents and communities choose to do things differently, in part influenced by cultural background, but in my experience, influenced even more by their sense of economic security, financial background, and class/wealth.

“We” in America includes everyone from low income/first-gen parents focused primarily on getting the kids off to college, to working class/middle class families hoping their kids will use their education to attain more financial security than they grew up with, to UMC families hoping their kids’ education will help them retain the security they have, to UHNW families with accessible generational wealth … and everything in between.

So of course these families will be approaching education differently, from pre-school to college and beyond.

And that’s ok! There’s no one way to raise happy, healthy, successful kids. Life is better when we choose what works for our family while giving everyone else the grace and space to do the same.

I agree it’s a personal choice. What I don’t really buy is the idea that success on paper or a sense of superiority automatically means someone has more innate talent, or that excellence comes effortlessly. Most of the time, there’s a real mental and physical cost behind it that people don’t talk about. Meanwhile, use that to argue about who's more worthy for the reward (in DCUM, it'd be college) is not convincing.

Success comes from effort, talent, and a bit of luck—but it shouldn’t mean sacrificing your mental or physical health or chasing it just for bragging points.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Korea is going to implode. They already have the lowest birth rate in the world. It's a fantastic place to visit and live if you don't have kids. But, the "cram" school in the US and the US education in general is a lot easier than in Korea. That's one of the reasons why people want to send their kids here.

Yes, they are importing some of their way of life here, but in some ways, it's no different than parents who push their kids to excel in sports in hopes for an athletic scholarship such that the kids are stressed (physically, too) and get little sleep. Same coin, different sides.

-Korean American

Great point. There’s no single “American” approach to educational priorities.

Different parents and communities choose to do things differently, in part influenced by cultural background, but in my experience, influenced even more by their sense of economic security, financial background, and class/wealth.

“We” in America includes everyone from low income/first-gen parents focused primarily on getting the kids off to college, to working class/middle class families hoping their kids will use their education to attain more financial security than they grew up with, to UMC families hoping their kids’ education will help them retain the security they have, to UHNW families with accessible generational wealth … and everything in between.

So of course these families will be approaching education differently, from pre-school to college and beyond.

And that’s ok! There’s no one way to raise happy, healthy, successful kids. Life is better when we choose what works for our family while giving everyone else the grace and space to do the same.

I agree it’s a personal choice. What I don’t really buy is the idea that success on paper or a sense of superiority automatically means someone has more innate talent, or that excellence comes effortlessly. Most of the time, there’s a real mental and physical cost behind it that people don’t talk about. Meanwhile, use that to argue about who's more worthy for the reward (in DCUM, it'd be college) is not convincing.

Success comes from effort, talent, and a bit of luck—but it shouldn’t mean sacrificing your mental or physical health or chasing it just for bragging points.

I happen to agree with you as it relates to my family.

But I’m completely fine with other parents choosing this route for their family if it’s what feels right to them. If “bragging rights” are their priority, that fine by me. Different strokes.

The key is not to get caught up in other people’s opinions.

Everything you describe above is interesting … and a matter of opinion. For example:

What does it mean to have “success”?
What exactly is “superior” to what and why?

What’s more important, valuable, or “real” - performance on paper or innate talent?

Which costs are with incurring for which rewards?

Your opinions and points of view on these questions are valid. And so are other people’s.

We all get to have opinions. And we all get to decide how much we take in, are influenced by, and/or OFFENDED by other people’s options.

Again, your call. I’m just skeptical of your use of the word “shouldn’t” when talking about other people’s values and priorities.

Even when I happen to agree, I see variations of the word “should” as a signal that someone is trying to pass off their opinion as a universal truth …

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Korea is going to implode. They already have the lowest birth rate in the world. It's a fantastic place to visit and live if you don't have kids. But, the "cram" school in the US and the US education in general is a lot easier than in Korea. That's one of the reasons why people want to send their kids here.

Yes, they are importing some of their way of life here, but in some ways, it's no different than parents who push their kids to excel in sports in hopes for an athletic scholarship such that the kids are stressed (physically, too) and get little sleep. Same coin, different sides.

-Korean American

Great point. There’s no single “American” approach to educational priorities.

Different parents and communities choose to do things differently, in part influenced by cultural background, but in my experience, influenced even more by their sense of economic security, financial background, and class/wealth.

“We” in America includes everyone from low income/first-gen parents focused primarily on getting the kids off to college, to working class/middle class families hoping their kids will use their education to attain more financial security than they grew up with, to UMC families hoping their kids’ education will help them retain the security they have, to UHNW families with accessible generational wealth … and everything in between.

So of course these families will be approaching education differently, from pre-school to college and beyond.

And that’s ok! There’s no one way to raise happy, healthy, successful kids. Life is better when we choose what works for our family while giving everyone else the grace and space to do the same.

I agree it’s a personal choice. What I don’t really buy is the idea that success on paper or a sense of superiority automatically means someone has more innate talent, or that excellence comes effortlessly. Most of the time, there’s a real mental and physical cost behind it that people don’t talk about. Meanwhile, use that to argue about who's more worthy for the reward (in DCUM, it'd be college) is not convincing.

Success comes from effort, talent, and a bit of luck—but it shouldn’t mean sacrificing your mental or physical health or chasing it just for bragging points.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m genuinely curious—does getting ahead really help?

What does getting ahead really mean?

It means you never walk into any class needing to rely on the classroom instruction. You could get an A on the final day one. More importantly, you never trust the US public school system to teach math or science. You learn it outside the system so that at higher levels you don’t struggle with gaps.

In the Bay Area, it is not uncommon for kids to start taking DE courses in 8th grade and have their GE, and DE major prerequisite courses complete with straight As along with the APs in high school to get the most rigorous check box by the end of junior year.

It also means that kids in public are competing with kids who have a second set of credentials. As it’s low cost to do this, they don’t trigger the pay to privilege box that other programs signal.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m genuinely curious—does getting ahead really help?

What does getting ahead really mean?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Korea is going to implode. They already have the lowest birth rate in the world. It's a fantastic place to visit and live if you don't have kids. But, the "cram" school in the US and the US education in general is a lot easier than in Korea. That's one of the reasons why people want to send their kids here.

Yes, they are importing some of their way of life here, but in some ways, it's no different than parents who push their kids to excel in sports in hopes for an athletic scholarship such that the kids are stressed (physically, too) and get little sleep. Same coin, different sides.

-Korean American

Great point. There’s no single “American” approach to educational priorities.

Different parents and communities choose to do things differently, in part influenced by cultural background, but in my experience, influenced even more by their sense of economic security, financial background, and class/wealth.

“We” in America includes everyone from low income/first-gen parents focused primarily on getting the kids off to college, to working class/middle class families hoping their kids will use their education to attain more financial security than they grew up with, to UMC families hoping their kids’ education will help them retain the security they have, to UHNW families with accessible generational wealth … and everything in between.

So of course these families will be approaching education differently, from pre-school to college and beyond.

And that’s ok! There’s no one way to raise happy, healthy, successful kids. Life is better when we choose what works for our family while giving everyone else the grace and space to do the same.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Korea is going to implode. They already have the lowest birth rate in the world. It's a fantastic place to visit and live if you don't have kids. But, the "cram" school in the US and the US education in general is a lot easier than in Korea. That's one of the reasons why people want to send their kids here.

Yes, they are importing some of their way of life here, but in some ways, it's no different than parents who push their kids to excel in sports in hopes for an athletic scholarship such that the kids are stressed (physically, too) and get little sleep. Same coin, different sides.

-Korean American

Great point. There’s no single “American” approach to educational priorities.

Different parents and communities choose to do things differently, in part influenced by cultural background, but in my experience, influenced even more by their sense of economic security, financial background, and class/wealth.

“We” in America includes everyone from low income/first-gen parents focused primarily on getting the kids off to college, to working class/middle class families hoping their kids will use their education to attain more financial security than they grew up with, to UMC families hoping their kids’ education will help them retain the security they have, to UHNW families with accessible generational wealth … and everything in between.

So of course these families will be approaching education differently, from pre-school to college and beyond.

And that’s ok! There’s no one way to raise happy, healthy, successful kids. Life is better when we choose what works for our family while giving everyone else the grace and space to do the same.

Anonymous wrote:Korea is going to implode. They already have the lowest birth rate in the world. It's a fantastic place to visit and live if you don't have kids. But, the "cram" school in the US and the US education in general is a lot easier than in Korea. That's one of the reasons why people want to send their kids here.

Yes, they are importing some of their way of life here, but in some ways, it's no different than parents who push their kids to excel in sports in hopes for an athletic scholarship such that the kids are stressed (physically, too) and get little sleep. Same coin, different sides.

-Korean American

Anonymous wrote:I’m genuinely curious—does getting ahead really help?