Anonymous
02/06/2026 13:19
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
Two friends banked eggs and had kids mid to late 40s. So well after establishing themselves. That said, it wasn't a choice. Marriages were later too.
Anonymous
02/06/2026 13:15
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
After residency, ages 34 and 36. Sure I'm one of the older moms, but here in the DMV area, it's not really an issue. It also depends on the specialty and spousal/familial support. Some are more flexible, less intense than others.
Anonymous
02/06/2026 07:33
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
I’m the PP who had kids in med school (before 3rd year) and residency (2nd year of residency). I’m glad I had them younger because if I had waited I wouldn’t have been able to get pregnant- I had a couple miscarriages trying at 32 for my second and finally had my second during residency at 33. I was a bit older as a resident so yes to the person up stream who commented with a eye-roll I didn’t want to be an older mom and I’m glad as I probably wouldn’t have been able to get pregnant if I waited. Anyway- med school is a really great time to have kids. It’s much more flexible now and many of the courses are pass fail. Residency is a terrible time to be a parent- my husband was the default parent and it was more like I was an absentee dad that kinda floated in and out. My schedule was all over the place. But it made me very clear about my post residency career so now I have a lot of flexibility in my job. Overall, worth it for me but definitely tough and your spouse needs to be 100% on board
Anonymous
02/05/2026 21:42
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
I had my first after I completed year 2 of grad school. It worked out really well despite it not working out from a relationship standpoint.
Anonymous
02/05/2026 21:34
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
At 33, one year out of training. I continued working full time and quit to stay home when I was 40. I'm 43 now and have no regrets.
Anonymous
02/05/2026 20:04
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
MD/PhD, during fellowship and as an attending (35 & 38)
Factors for me:
I only wanted (initially) one kid, so starting earlier didn’t seen urgent, and tbh I wasn’t set on having kids til my early 30s.
I really, really wanted to have time to spend early years with them
I fast tracked so got to the non-clinically demanding part of fellowship a year earlier which helped
My husband is also a physician, and we didn’t live super near either set of grandparents, and none of them were retired at the time. The cost of a nanny when we were both trainees would have been almost prohibitive, but was doable when I was a fellow/he was an attending.
There are times I wish I’d had my kids younger, but there are not times I wish I’d had to parent through residency/fellowship. My don (6) remembers my first year as an attending, when I did a lot of inpatient work, as the year I wasn’t home for dinner and worked weekends. It was three years ago, as I stopped doing inpatient work when my daughter was born (still FT, but no call/weekends).
I would rather parent at 38 with flexibility and $$$ than at 33 with neither, but that is a personal choice. If you have fam $$ and/or fam around to help raise the kids, you may chose differently.
Factors for me:
I only wanted (initially) one kid, so starting earlier didn’t seen urgent, and tbh I wasn’t set on having kids til my early 30s.
I really, really wanted to have time to spend early years with them
I fast tracked so got to the non-clinically demanding part of fellowship a year earlier which helped
My husband is also a physician, and we didn’t live super near either set of grandparents, and none of them were retired at the time. The cost of a nanny when we were both trainees would have been almost prohibitive, but was doable when I was a fellow/he was an attending.
There are times I wish I’d had my kids younger, but there are not times I wish I’d had to parent through residency/fellowship. My don (6) remembers my first year as an attending, when I did a lot of inpatient work, as the year I wasn’t home for dinner and worked weekends. It was three years ago, as I stopped doing inpatient work when my daughter was born (still FT, but no call/weekends).
I would rather parent at 38 with flexibility and $$$ than at 33 with neither, but that is a personal choice. If you have fam $$ and/or fam around to help raise the kids, you may chose differently.
Anonymous
02/05/2026 17:36
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
When I (non-doctor) was in labor (in the hospital bed) with my first child at 36, I had a short but memorable conversation with a young female med student who came to observe me. She was quite pregnant. She thought med school was the perfect time for her.
I was at MBA school from 28-30. Two of my classmates got pregnant during first year. And some of the women had kids in daycare. I thought at the time that it must have been really hard. Now I see that my MBA school must have been a lot more like working from home and probably wasn't as rough as working an office job with a baby in care, pumping, etc.
One got accommodations on end of term deadlines. The other had her baby at a convenient point in summer.
I was at MBA school from 28-30. Two of my classmates got pregnant during first year. And some of the women had kids in daycare. I thought at the time that it must have been really hard. Now I see that my MBA school must have been a lot more like working from home and probably wasn't as rough as working an office job with a baby in care, pumping, etc.
One got accommodations on end of term deadlines. The other had her baby at a convenient point in summer.
Anonymous
02/05/2026 16:49
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
First in residency, second a few months after finishing. Did ivf with both. It was really, really hard.
Anonymous
02/05/2026 16:47
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
As an attending - 38
Tried for 3-4 years & it didn’t work. Dx’d with endometriosis. Had to wait until I was an attending because we couldn’t afford IVF and my schedule would not allow for all of the doctors visits. Had twins. Luckily no complications & I worked until 38 weeks when I had a scheduled c-section.
Was able to afford a nanny as an attending, which was very helpful, as our families cannot help financially - not sure what the heck we were planning to do if I had gotten pregnant when I was in training!
If my kids want kids and end up in my position (which may happen, as both my sister and I had endometriosis so perhaps it’s genetic) I will tell them to start IVF earlier and provide money for both fertility treatments and childcare.
It was very stressful.
Tried for 3-4 years & it didn’t work. Dx’d with endometriosis. Had to wait until I was an attending because we couldn’t afford IVF and my schedule would not allow for all of the doctors visits. Had twins. Luckily no complications & I worked until 38 weeks when I had a scheduled c-section.
Was able to afford a nanny as an attending, which was very helpful, as our families cannot help financially - not sure what the heck we were planning to do if I had gotten pregnant when I was in training!
If my kids want kids and end up in my position (which may happen, as both my sister and I had endometriosis so perhaps it’s genetic) I will tell them to start IVF earlier and provide money for both fertility treatments and childcare.
It was very stressful.
Anonymous
02/05/2026 16:31
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
After fellowship at 32 and 34.
Anonymous
02/05/2026 16:13
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
Anonymous wrote:Med school and residency. Tough but glad I did it as I didn’t want to be an older mom.
Anonymous
02/04/2026 21:47
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
Anonymous wrote:Med school and residency. Tough but glad I did it as I didn’t want to be an older mom.
Can I ask what year of med school and residency?
Anonymous
02/04/2026 07:52
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
During 2-year research fellowship in the middle of surgery residency. We wanted two kids and ended up having twins, so it was perfect in every respect.
Anonymous
02/04/2026 07:29
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
Med school and residency. Tough but glad I did it as I didn’t want to be an older mom.
Anonymous
02/04/2026 07:21
Subject: If you are a female doctor with kids, when did you have them, and how do you feel about it in retrospect?
Did you have a child in medical school, or residency? If you did a fellowship, did you have a child then? Or did you wait till your training was over?