I couldn’t read the whole article.

I moved to dc from nyc a decade ago. I have definitely encountered mom cliques. This is normal. I have one friend who was very much the head of our mom group and she definitely had a type. You had to be attractive to be in her group. My kids are teens now. Most of these groups fizzle out by late elementary.

Anonymous wrote:Doesn’t resonate with me at all. Guess we should avoid the Boston area.

+1

A bunch of my relatives are from the town described in the article and a neighboring one that’s even wealthier. They all seem much more normal than the people in this article. They’re well off but they’re much more of the ll bean set than the lululemon set.

Anonymous wrote:I couldn’t read the article. It’s full of yacht club this, tennis match that. The author is choosing to write about a certain social set. Who cares.

This. It's not my world at all. My friends don't operate in groups.

Now we have kids my closest friend and I don't get together as much anymore but we text pretty much every day (pictures of the kids, talking about current events, books, TV, etc.).

I couldn’t read the article. It’s full of yacht club this, tennis match that. The author is choosing to write about a certain social set. Who cares.

Anonymous wrote:How accurate is this for you:
https://www.bostonmagazine.com/news/2014/03/25/mean-moms-suburbs/

The author lives in an alternate universe. Her life and her friends' lives bear more resemblance to the Pokemon animated series than my real life. There is no way to inject that much manufactured drama into a real SAHM's life, except perhaps with the help of psychedelic mushrooms.

This is from 2014, so the moms in it would be elder Millennials at a minimum, and more likely Gen X, as it sounds like they had preschool or even school age children in 2014. I wonder if things are different for mom groups these days. Can your average 40 year old couple with, say, a 3 year old and a 6 year old, even afford a ritzy suburb with a SAHM? All the high income couples I know in rich areas have two working parents, or if they do have a SAH or part time working mom, the kids are maybe a bit older and mom seems to be more in the early 50s/“early retirement” situation.

Anytime the "suburban mom archetype" starts whining about something, I find it rather ridiculous. Adults always have a harder time making friends than children. Do adult men complain about this? Do single professional women complain about this? It's hard for ALL groups.

Doesn’t resonate with me at all. Guess we should avoid the Boston area.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, not at all. I've found Arlington moms to be very down to earth.

Do you live in Arlington?

Yes. North.

Wow. Axe to grind?
I read for about 10 seconds and got annoyed.
I do work FT but do 12 hour days so have more days off. The mom friends I made kept me sane when DD was a baby and thru the elem years. Just having friends to meet for coffee at someone’s house once or twice a month, meeting a friend in the playroom at the library once a week or someone to walk with on a nice day, kept me from being lonely.
I loved those early years with DD but enjoyed the camaraderie of other moms too.

Anonymous wrote:No, not at all. I've found Arlington moms to be very down to earth.

Do you live in Arlington?

No, not at all. I've found Arlington moms to be very down to earth.

The group element is not true for me at all -- I've never been a member of one of these cliques where membership is defined and controlled by a "queen bee".

However, the dynamics ring true for me, for a lot of the relationships between adult women, especially mothers. Most female friendships are honestly really shallow and often based on transactional aspects, or just convenient. Many women are very gossipy and judgmental, especially of other mothers. I have a small number of true friends and most I've known for decades, so our relationships are beyond that kind of thing. But friendships among fellow parents at daycare or elementary school? They tend to be shallow and hierarchical and involve these kinds of backbiting and judgment, in my experience. I view it as something I have to endure in this stage of my life, and not a true source of friendship.

I'm luck to have other friends, and also I think to be older and better able to handle some of the loneliness that comes with parenting in this day and age than I would have been when I was younger.

How accurate is this for you:
https://www.bostonmagazine.com/news/2014/03/25/mean-moms-suburbs/