Anonymous wrote:Do men care about building a long-term relationship with someone and really knowing them as a person? Do they value that depth?

Or is it really just about the sex and the woman being happy, compliant, and making his life easier?

I'm having a string of interactions lately that are making me believe it's the latter and that's depressing. If that's the case, I'd rather abstain.

Enjoy your cats.

As intelligence rises the need for emotional connection seems to rise with it.
I have had uncomplicated boyfriends who would absolutely wear me out and they usually have no need to feel I truly connected outside of our bed.
I have had really complicated and extraordinarily bright boyfriends who wore me out in different ways, but they also required a real connection outside of the bedroom.

Yes, of course. The good men are looking for emotional intimacy. My guess is that divorced men (and women) have more baggage and less ability to make themselves fully emotionally available like they might have when they were 25. But yes, men that you want to be with are looking for some level of emotional intimacy.

I recently started dating a 45 y.o. divorced man who said right away that he is looking for an emotional connection. We have a lot of sex too and cuddle for hours.

Sex is important in a relationship. But emotional intimacy is more important. I am in a marriage where I don’t have either. It is super lonely. Find a man who has a similar world view and who is emotionally available- prioritize these and work on the sex.

Emotional intimacy is great and I don't need a woman to make my life easier.

And yet, sex is far and away the most important part of any relationship.

What's emotional intimacy?

Of course they do! You were just with a bunch of losers.

Anonymous wrote:The ones who did were less sexual/capable in bedroom. I tend to think that male sexuality and the need for emotional connection don’t go together

That’s kind of fascinating

Yes.

Anonymous wrote:The ones who did were less sexual/capable in bedroom. I tend to think that male sexuality and the need for emotional connection don’t go together

How were they different in the bedroom?

The ones who did were less sexual/capable in bedroom. I tend to think that male sexuality and the need for emotional connection don’t go together

Make better choices?

Doesn’t seem like it.

Do men care about building a long-term relationship with someone and really knowing them as a person? Do they value that depth?

Or is it really just about the sex and the woman being happy, compliant, and making his life easier?

I'm having a string of interactions lately that are making me believe it's the latter and that's depressing. If that's the case, I'd rather abstain.