We don't exchange gifts with extended family.
We don't buy much for ourselves, or our children. This year has been particularly minimalist: my work happens to be brutal this Holiday season, my college kid is abroad and just wants money, and my teen kid wanted specific stuff that doesn't takes up much room. None of us felt like cooking a large meal, we don't have guests this year...

... but our tree is huge and we just put up our beloved decorations on it an hour ago!

Anonymous wrote:Why are you buying all of this stuff? And you expect to get rid of most of it in 6 months? You’re part of the problem.

I bought a few items for each child that I knew they wanted. DH “surprised” me with a bunch of stuff, including a bunch of books for me that he knows I don’t have time to read. I now mostly listen to audiobooks when I’m doing laundry, dishes, etc. Then my mom asked the children what they wanted and she sent a bunch of presents.

Who bought the gifts?

I am just giving $$ to everyone. They can do what they want with it.

Anonymous wrote:Why are you buying all of this stuff? And you expect to get rid of most of it in 6 months? You’re part of the problem.

This.

Why are you buying all of this stuff? And you expect to get rid of most of it in 6 months? You’re part of the problem.

I don't understand. Who bought the gifts?

My kids don't have any gifts under the tree that I expect to donate or throw away in 6 months time. It's possible there are one or two that could wind up being wrong for them, in which case we will donate or give away. But we were the ones who bought the gifts. We didn't buy a bunch of garbage destined for the landfill. We considered space and what kids already had when we purchased.

Also we always do a small clean out prior to Christmas and birthdays where we go through kids toys and clothes and identify anything that is too small or young or doens't work anymore, and either hand off to younger friends or cousins or, if it's been too well loved, throw away. Thus we always have some space for the new gifts to be put away and organized.

You're in charge. You shouldn't have to "cope" with a holiday where you decide what and how much to buy.

It^

Do something about.

This is thoughtful of you, OP. Is there a reason you don't just scale back and buy fewer gifts?

Another poster who finds Christmas gift giving overwhelming. I've tried to get my husband to tamp it down over the years but it never worked. Now that my children are adults, he's finally letting go a little.

Thanks for posting this OP, I’m exactly the same way and struggle with the fact that a lot of the gifts will ultimately end up on a landfill someday. My parents and in-laws love to shower their grandkids with gifts but realistically they will only play with some of these toys a couple times then I will have to feel guilty for donating or tossing them.

How old are your children? If young, toys and “stuff” are an expected part of Christmas. As they get older, try replacing things with experiences - like tickets to a play or concert. Or instead of lots of small gifts, one or 2 more special ones.

We do the four gifts thing. Much more manageable.

I'm a minimalist and find a lot of stuff overwhelming. I enjoy Christmas and love to see my children happy and enjoying the moment. They are tons for gifts under the tree. In about six months, most of the stuff will be donated because it is way more than we need. I would rather donate part of the $ to a food bank or Toys for Tots. Just looking at the tree this evening makes me anxious. I'm privileged and a lot of people would love to have this problem. I am grateful to have gotten to where I am today but I'm also struggling with the overabundance of meaningless stuff and that fact that some of that spending could have helped people in need.