Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 15:09     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Talk to your child. This may be a simple the child needed to volunteer or bring home a flyer and your child did not situation.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 14:39     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Our school does have some things like this, but other things are mentioned to kids themselves and parents are only contacted if their kid indicates interest. If you have a kid that doesn’t always volunteer themselves and/or just doesn’t pay a ton of attention, that’s another possibility. One of my kids is invited to do everything while another is barely cognizant that the activities exist; if it weren’t for kid #1, I’d think opportunities weren’t advertised to the kids themselves… but because of kid #1, I know they are.


OP here, that could be it.

Thanks to the other PPs too. I don’t think the leadership club in this case is code for behavior improvement—I know the kids and they are good kids.

Exclusive clubs are not the same as ability-based, open-through-competition clubs. Teachers inviting certain kids quietly is problematic in elementary in my opinion. Letting kids try and fail is a good exercise. But creating opportunities only for certain kids and quietly/almost secretly is quite another. I don’t know exactly what’s happening though and didn’t want to jump to conclusions.


But the point is that some of the "exclusive clubs" are things that the kids implicitly auditioned for via their classes (DCPS math bowl, DCPS Google competition, Battle of the Books, DCPS 5th Grade All Star Choir). The math instructional coach, the music teacher, etc don't need to do sham auditions, because they already know which kids can do math, read books quickly, sing well, etc. Your kid was eligible and considered, he just didn't get it.


What does “implicitly auditioned” mean? Shouldn’t the kids and parents (in elementary) be told these opportunities exist? You can’t compete for or be motivated by something if you don’t know about it. I’m perfectly fine with my kid being told you’re not good enough for this if that’s the case, but that’s not what happened.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 14:06     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Our school does have some things like this, but other things are mentioned to kids themselves and parents are only contacted if their kid indicates interest. If you have a kid that doesn’t always volunteer themselves and/or just doesn’t pay a ton of attention, that’s another possibility. One of my kids is invited to do everything while another is barely cognizant that the activities exist; if it weren’t for kid #1, I’d think opportunities weren’t advertised to the kids themselves… but because of kid #1, I know they are.


OP here, that could be it.

Thanks to the other PPs too. I don’t think the leadership club in this case is code for behavior improvement—I know the kids and they are good kids.

Exclusive clubs are not the same as ability-based, open-through-competition clubs. Teachers inviting certain kids quietly is problematic in elementary in my opinion. Letting kids try and fail is a good exercise. But creating opportunities only for certain kids and quietly/almost secretly is quite another. I don’t know exactly what’s happening though and didn’t want to jump to conclusions.


But the point is that some of the "exclusive clubs" are things that the kids implicitly auditioned for via their classes (DCPS math bowl, DCPS Google competition, Battle of the Books, DCPS 5th Grade All Star Choir). The math instructional coach, the music teacher, etc don't need to do sham auditions, because they already know which kids can do math, read books quickly, sing well, etc. Your kid was eligible and considered, he just didn't get it.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 12:19     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Anonymous wrote:Our school does have some things like this, but other things are mentioned to kids themselves and parents are only contacted if their kid indicates interest. If you have a kid that doesn’t always volunteer themselves and/or just doesn’t pay a ton of attention, that’s another possibility. One of my kids is invited to do everything while another is barely cognizant that the activities exist; if it weren’t for kid #1, I’d think opportunities weren’t advertised to the kids themselves… but because of kid #1, I know they are.


OP here, that could be it.

Thanks to the other PPs too. I don’t think the leadership club in this case is code for behavior improvement—I know the kids and they are good kids.

Exclusive clubs are not the same as ability-based, open-through-competition clubs. Teachers inviting certain kids quietly is problematic in elementary in my opinion. Letting kids try and fail is a good exercise. But creating opportunities only for certain kids and quietly/almost secretly is quite another. I don’t know exactly what’s happening though and didn’t want to jump to conclusions.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 11:33     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Our school does have some things like this, but other things are mentioned to kids themselves and parents are only contacted if their kid indicates interest. If you have a kid that doesn’t always volunteer themselves and/or just doesn’t pay a ton of attention, that’s another possibility. One of my kids is invited to do everything while another is barely cognizant that the activities exist; if it weren’t for kid #1, I’d think opportunities weren’t advertised to the kids themselves… but because of kid #1, I know they are.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 11:29     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Anonymous wrote:My kid is in 5th and we’ve recently become aware of at least three clubs (mix of sports, arts and general “leadership”) that were either “by invitation” or not at all advertised to the kids. We’ve found out by accident. Do we talk to individual teachers, or someone else at the school? It’s really crappy to exclude kids who are otherwise described as “great friends, inclusive, leaders,” etc. If we were at a private, I’d understand it this seems crazy in upper elementary.


Why does it seem crazy that some opportunities are selective? Why does your kid deserve them by being a good friend or leader or whatever? It drives me a bit crazy that everyone accepts that sports cut, but when it comes to academic or other skills there’s this notion that those opportunities should be open to everyone. Why? My kid isn’t making the varsity basketball team; why is limiting other opportunities similarly wrong? I wish DCPS did more of it.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 11:24     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
I think as long as there are club opportunities for all kids, it’s ok.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 11:22     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Our school has these. My kid was invited to a Google math competition we never would have known about if they hadn’t been invited. The school fielded a small team. There is also a selective music program that works the same way — you hear about it only if your kid is invited.

There’s also Safety Patrol, which is advertised to everyone, but selective (a pretty competitive) and requires a teacher’s recommendation… but I assume you’re not talking about something set up like that.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 11:02     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Leadership club is code for “maybe this will change their behavior.” Don’t feel left out.


This.


Not always. My kids' school has leadership/class representative thing but it's by nomination (from classmates) and selection by the teacher. It's definitely not for the kids with the behavioral problems.

If you're feeling left out that your kid wasn't included, just find out who the faculty member in charge is and ask if there's room. And consider the possibility that your kid may not be a good fit, your kid may not be quite ready for it, or your kid may not have even wanted to do the activity.

I am happy any time DCPS is doing something to recognize higher skills in kids. Not everything needs to be open to everyone and slowed down to the pace of the least able child. I wish DCPS would do more of this.


As a counterpoint, when I was in middle school I tried out for theater, yearbook, and basketball one year. Didn't get a part or position for any of them. Don't think anyone connected the dots when I stopped trying at everything the following year. I was a kid who really, really could have used the structure and belonging of an organized activity.

It's fine if not everything is open to everyone, but I think it's the responsibility of the school to ensure every student has a place somewhere.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 09:21     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Leadership club is code for “maybe this will change their behavior.” Don’t feel left out.


This.


Not always. My kids' school has leadership/class representative thing but it's by nomination (from classmates) and selection by the teacher. It's definitely not for the kids with the behavioral problems.

If you're feeling left out that your kid wasn't included, just find out who the faculty member in charge is and ask if there's room. And consider the possibility that your kid may not be a good fit, your kid may not be quite ready for it, or your kid may not have even wanted to do the activity.

I am happy any time DCPS is doing something to recognize higher skills in kids. Not everything needs to be open to everyone and slowed down to the pace of the least able child. I wish DCPS would do more of this.


Agree with this. My kids are invited to some things and not to others. Reality is a good thing!
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 08:33     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Leadership club is code for “maybe this will change their behavior.” Don’t feel left out.


This.


Not always. My kids' school has leadership/class representative thing but it's by nomination (from classmates) and selection by the teacher. It's definitely not for the kids with the behavioral problems.

If you're feeling left out that your kid wasn't included, just find out who the faculty member in charge is and ask if there's room. And consider the possibility that your kid may not be a good fit, your kid may not be quite ready for it, or your kid may not have even wanted to do the activity.

I am happy any time DCPS is doing something to recognize higher skills in kids. Not everything needs to be open to everyone and slowed down to the pace of the least able child. I wish DCPS would do more of this.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 07:41     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Anonymous wrote:Leadership club is code for “maybe this will change their behavior.” Don’t feel left out.


This.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 07:41     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
I don't know... I think that's unusual. Our school did do a math enrichment for 4th that was based on high test scores, but it certainly wasn't secret and they don't do it anymore anyway For 5th/6th there's soccer and the kids try out, only some of them are on a team that plays other schools and the remainder participate in practice and informal scrimmages. But it isn't a secret.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 07:40     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
Leadership club is code for “maybe this will change their behavior.” Don’t feel left out.
Anonymous
Post 12/18/2025 07:19     Subject: Exclusive school clubs in 4th and 5th grade
My kid is in 5th and we’ve recently become aware of at least three clubs (mix of sports, arts and general “leadership”) that were either “by invitation” or not at all advertised to the kids. We’ve found out by accident. Do we talk to individual teachers, or someone else at the school? It’s really crappy to exclude kids who are otherwise described as “great friends, inclusive, leaders,” etc. If we were at a private, I’d understand it this seems crazy in upper elementary.