I have a chronic disease that is no longer responding to treatments that have worked for decades, so I'm in a lot of medical flux. DH doesn't attend appointments where I talk through options with my doctor, but he comes to all of my treatments and procedures...even ones where I don't need a driver to take me home.

It would not be strange at all to have your spouse at appointments where you discuss results and options, it's just not what we do. DH doesn't tend to ask that many questions anyway. He insists on being with me for the treatmetns and procedures. I don't feel like i always need support, but I do appreciate that he takes it seriously.

Sure, bring her! DH and I go to some of each other's appointments, especially if it's a new or serious condition.

Managed, not mashed! Stupid Autocorrect!

Yes, it’s a very good idea. Also because you can then compare an make sure you caught the same impression from what the doctor said. It can be hard to remember everything.

Make a list first too, both of you. A fib is no joke. Best wishes to you, it can be mashed successfully for decades.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's fairly normal when people get older. You want your spouse to understand your wishes regarded end-of-life care.

You went to deep end with OP’s simple question

OP - sincerely hope I have a lot more life left. Just want to make sure I am doing what is needed to get there.

Why not just ask your wife and see what she thinks?

Important ones or ones you shouldn’t drive home from. My parents go to all of each others appointments but they’re retired and making going to appointments their main activity.

You think you need an advocate. Why are you crowd sourcing!! Ask her.

What others do doesn’t matter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's fairly normal when people get older. You want your spouse to understand your wishes regarded end-of-life care.

You went to deep end with OP’s simple question

OP - sincerely hope I have a lot more life left. Just want to make sure I am doing what is needed to get there.

Anonymous wrote:It's fairly normal when people get older. You want your spouse to understand your wishes regarded end-of-life care.

You went to deep end with OP’s simple question

Anonymous wrote:Older guy here with AFib. My yearly appointment with the cardiologist is coming up. Have never asked my wife to go with me. But I am starting to feel that she may ask questions that I would not think of, so maybe it's a good idea to bring her along?

I went to almost all of DH’s oncologist appts. He went to almost all of mine. We do think of questions the other didn’t.

If it would be helpful to you, then do it. It's your health.

Yes when it's something important and feel like I need a witness/advocate/person to ask questions and write things down. For routine appointments no.

Sometimes. Usually just the ones we think I might pass out at.

If your instinct is saying it might be a good idea, then mention it.

It's fairly normal when people get older. You want your spouse to understand your wishes regarded end-of-life care.

Older guy here with AFib. My yearly appointment with the cardiologist is coming up. Have never asked my wife to go with me. But I am starting to feel that she may ask questions that I would not think of, so maybe it's a good idea to bring her along?