Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Completely annoying.
My son was 10 and walked to his friends house. They came back to my house with 4 year old brother in tow! I said "why did you bring him here?" "My moms at work and my dad wants to take a nap." Hell no. I walked the 4 year old back to his house.

There is a family like this near us. It’s super sad because the older child is clearly expected to be watching the preschooler any time they are not at school and probably will not be allowed to go without him. I try not to judge because I know the family has some real challenges but I feel terrible for the oldest child. I almost wonder if it’s the same family (ages are the same).

I do think some of the “no playdate” families have a similar dynamic.

I don't think so. We're basically a no playdate family, and this is one reason why. My kid wants to play with your kid. I do not want to entertain, feed, and/or babysit all the children in your family.

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is 9. Why are people still bringing siblings???? If we invite someone over for a play date, why would you think to bring siblings? You can drop off and leave. Or we invited a group of girls over for a group play date and everyone seems to expect to bring their entire families.

I don’t really want your 11yo older brother or the 4-5 year old brothers. Also don’t want the 7yo sister.

I can’t find a way to tell these people not to bring the unwanted siblings.

I have a son and he would NOT want to tag along his little sister’s play date.

They're being borderline rude, if not outright rude, so you need to make it very plain that you are only inviting the one friend over for a playdate. A PP gave sample wording. Just make it clear. "Kayla would like to invite Larla over for a playdate after school on Wednesday. I will be supervising but also working so cannot accommodate her siblings this time." I know folks will say that makes it sound like you can accommodate them next time but just say that every. single. time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Completely annoying.
My son was 10 and walked to his friends house. They came back to my house with 4 year old brother in tow! I said "why did you bring him here?" "My moms at work and my dad wants to take a nap." Hell no. I walked the 4 year old back to his house.

There is a family like this near us. It’s super sad because the older child is clearly expected to be watching the preschooler any time they are not at school and probably will not be allowed to go without him. I try not to judge because I know the family has some real challenges but I feel terrible for the oldest child. I almost wonder if it’s the same family (ages are the same).

I do think some of the “no playdate” families have a similar dynamic.

FWIW I have allowed both kids over and then entertained the little one myself.

Anonymous wrote:Completely annoying.
My son was 10 and walked to his friends house. They came back to my house with 4 year old brother in tow! I said "why did you bring him here?" "My moms at work and my dad wants to take a nap." Hell no. I walked the 4 year old back to his house.

There is a family like this near us. It’s super sad because the older child is clearly expected to be watching the preschooler any time they are not at school and probably will not be allowed to go without him. I try not to judge because I know the family has some real challenges but I feel terrible for the oldest child. I almost wonder if it’s the same family (ages are the same).

I do think some of the “no playdate” families have a similar dynamic.

Anonymous wrote:Be very clear in your invites that it’s drop off. “Larla would love to have Karla over one day next week. If you drop her off around 3, we could bring her home by 6 before dinner.”

This

I have said “larlo wants to have Sam over.” Larlo and Sam are in seventh grade.

Sam shows up with his seven year old sister in tow. She doesn’t know how to walk back to her house alone, so either Sam spends half the playdate walking her home and coming back or I put up with her.

IME it’s cultural. White families send only the one kid and immigrant families send the whole family and often the parents come too. Just different expectations.

Ugh. My mom used to do this all the time to me when I growing up. I had a younger sister and it sucked. I really wanted to have my own friends and felt like this negatively impacted me. Its good for kids to go on their own playdates. You are also providing space for children to be independent by holding this boundary with parents.

Be very clear in your invites that it’s drop off. “Larla would love to have Karla over one day next week. If you drop her off around 3, we could bring her home by 6 before dinner.”

I can’t find a way to tell these people ...

why? use your words

Good Lord! What is wrong with people?

"Jessie would like to invite Ali for a playdate."
"Oh great, I'll drop off Ali and Callie Tuesday at 4pm."
"Sorry if I wasn't clear - Jessie was hoping to just play with Ali, and I can't entertain Callie as she's five years younger than Jessie and Ali. If we have to switch to a different day that's fine."

Completely annoying.
My son was 10 and walked to his friends house. They came back to my house with 4 year old brother in tow! I said "why did you bring him here?" "My moms at work and my dad wants to take a nap." Hell no. I walked the 4 year old back to his house.

Hi we can only accommodate XXX today. Thanks.

Repeat each & every time.

I once invited a boy over and the mom brought the son and his twin younger siblings. They stayed for over 6 hours. I should have just stopped them at the door at drop off. She could not take a hint.

My daughter is 9. Why are people still bringing siblings???? If we invite someone over for a play date, why would you think to bring siblings? You can drop off and leave. Or we invited a group of girls over for a group play date and everyone seems to expect to bring their entire families.

I don’t really want your 11yo older brother or the 4-5 year old brothers. Also don’t want the 7yo sister.

I can’t find a way to tell these people not to bring the unwanted siblings.

I have a son and he would NOT want to tag along his little sister’s play date.