You sound as if you have a mental disorder, OP. There is no relation to how well you did in school, particularly in extra curriculars, and how well you do in your profession. There is some relation during high school and college admissions, in terms of how prestigious a college you can get into, thanks to your grades and general resume. But that's it.

If you got through engineering, your IQ mustn't be low. I will guess that you're on the spectrum and that your poor social skills are impeding your career, or that you have some other mental health issue.

Do you have good social skills? It’s not just about knowledge.

There’s a lot you can’t control. My DS and I talk a lot about how at his competitive private, it’s so hard to make a team or win an award. If he went to our tiny public, he could play whatever he wanted. Neighbors make all-conference at the public who wouldn’t make varsity at his school. Maybe that’s your situation. It doesn’t mean you weren’t good enough. It was the pond you were swimming in.

What you have control over now is your career. If you can handle the risk, you could do something big. Personally I’m not a risk taker and looked for stability and good benefits in my career. That’s how I measured success. It’s not too late for you, if you want that path. It’s also ok to find success and happiness in other ways.

Accomplishment is due to performance. Performance is due to effort and focus. Not being in clubs or playing sports is irrelevant to anything professional. If you're in the wrong job for your capabilities, you'll not be happy and you may not be able to perform at a high level. If you're in a job which is suited to your skills and interests and you perform well, you should be rewarded accordingly. Figure out where the mismatch is and correct it - get a different job, work harder, acquire new skills, whatever is necessary. But blaming your lack of accomplishment on nonsense like sports and clubs is simply avoiding critical self-examination. There are reasons you didn't get "good jobs" or internships - you know what they are. Address those failings now and move forward.

I did not do sports or school leadership or date in HS and I had an amazing time - absolutely loved HS. And am content in my job too, even though I "could have been more."

The sucky economy is real but the attitude is 100% you. Especially the choice to dwell on HS and college, which are a tiny blip in the arc of your life.

It is BS. Look I did crap in HS, graduated a C average, did crap in college and got a C average.

Graduated took a very low paying job (lower than is just went full time on my part time job during college) at a small bank for peanuts. No one wanted the job. But I took it as title was management training program. Guess what one year of that I pivoted to a high paying role as now my college GPA was meaningless.

Having a good GPA, graduating a great college wears off quick. Then I got MBA part time at work then my career took off.

I had so many people with A averages work for me over the years. Does not help them when they are 40.

It's the economy - not you. There has been so much corporate consolidation in the past 10-15 years that there are just no good jobs anymore. Lets say there are 50 grocery stores in the economy. When you have 10 companies each owning 5 stores, for example, you need 10 vice presidents and 50 managers and there is a lot of movement and upward mobility. When you have 2 companies each owning 25 stores, you need only need 2 vice presidents - so each of those 50 managers basically stays at the managerial level.

The Magnificent 7 control 60% of the U.S. GDP in 2024, up from 10% in 2014. 7 companies control more than half of the economy. And it's only going to get worse as corporate consolidation creates an economic death spiral.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP, getting an engineering degree is no joke!

Sorry, hit "submit" too soon. Not everyone can get into engineering school and complete the degree. If you want to do something else, possibly think about MBA / project management or law school for IP law and patent bar; I would try to do it while still keeping your engineering day job, though.

Absolutely do not take on educational debt. If OP can't find success today, a degree and debt isn't going to make that better.

It sounds like you have issues that you don't want to own.

I was a scientist and there is no money in science. So I switched to careers that don't require fancy degrees and have built two, 7 figure businesses. Money isn't about degrees.

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP, getting an engineering degree is no joke!

Sorry, hit "submit" too soon. Not everyone can get into engineering school and complete the degree. If you want to do something else, possibly think about MBA / project management or law school for IP law and patent bar; I would try to do it while still keeping your engineering day job, though.

Hey OP, getting an engineering degree is no joke!

I played multiple sports every year in high school and even had some side jobs while being an honor student. But I still feel like I missed out on the high school experience because it sucked socially and dating wise ( I wasn't a cool kid).

So just letting you know you can play sports/intern and still feel like high school sucked. But we should probably move on and stop living in the past right? Lol

Most importantly...

What do you do now?

What do you want to do?

There are typically several non+cut HS sports teams. You just didn't do them. So what? Move on and become active now. Review your resume, get some decent clothes and a good haircut, practice interviewing skills, and apply, apply, apply.

Stop with the pity party and get your head out of your ass. Just the way you wrote “got denied from virtually every” tells me that you weren’t denied from every club…you just didn’t get into the ones you thought you deserved to get into. You also got into college, an engineering program, etc. Lots of things have come your way, but because you aren’t grateful, you are complaining instead of making the most of all the opportunities already given to you.

Get off the internet and start working.

It’s not like I was lazy when I was young. I worked extremely hard in school, but I guess it wasn’t the right work at the right place at the right time. I couldn’t land any leadership positions in high school or make any sports teams, and it feels like I missed the high school experience. In college, I studied engineering and got denied from virtually every research position, club, and internship. I was never able to find a good job after college, and it just gets tougher year and after year knowing how little opportunities you get after school. It’s frustrating, and it feels I am trapped in my current economic situation