Read Carolyn Hax or write to her. I'm serious. She is great about boundaries. You can Google her name and initiating and some old columns come up.

You might have better luck thinking less of the term
"people pleaser" ( vague, not really a psychological construct). Try books or podcasts around terms such as low self esteem, boundaries or self care.

I need to step back, protect my energy and stop being the initiator. Any books or podcasts or resources on this?