Anonymous wrote:Of course you can suggest. If not, what are we here for.

Seriously. Stop being scared of your kids.

We're hands off with activities, but we've definitely said "hey would you ever want to try XYZ?" We just don't cajole or require or anything.

I really hated the early specialization of things and let my kids know my thoughts about it and why I chose specific activities for them each season.

Of course I also see how this resulted them at being kind of good at multiple sports but not REALLY good at any specific one. And were at a disadvantage once trying to make the transition to higher level sports playing against the kids that specialized for several years and played year round.

I don't know what specific sports you're referring to but I would let your daughter know your thoughts and concerns. Plus the benefit of playing other sports. They all relate to each other and benefit each other. And also it prevents some overuse injuries too.

You can kind of go the other way too. Where you can identify what areas your daughter needs work on and try to give her help with it. With additional training sessions, private coaching, etc.

As others mentioned it's good that she shows the motivation and desire for the activity and that counts and helps a lot of ways. And I wouldn't necessarily discourage her from it. Your daughter is getting to the point where I think it's okay to start specializing.

But at the same time I saw some families split off to try to get into higher level sports at younger ages, when I kind of questioned if they showed they were ready or if it would be worthwhile for them. And saw how devoted they were with it the past several years and they're still struggling to make the breakthrough. And since they were so devoted to that activity, they never really learned anything else. So in some ways seems like that effort was for nothing. I know there are probably some intangibles that they picked up along the way and they may still have a chance if they keep working on it. But is why I would encourage your daughter to explore other options. Just to get the benefits from it and also so it's something that they can pursue if the other sport doesn't work out and they end up enjoyinng the other sport.

I just sign my kids up and tell them they are going to try something new. As long as it doesn't interfere with sport a that she is committed to.

But yes of course you can suggest, even encourage or bribe.

Sounds like your kid is a rigid thinker. I have two like that, and generally have not pushed them, but once and awhile it’s worth it. My oldest is so so thankful I pushed her to try another sport that she now loves as much as her “main” love. At the time she was slightly annoyed, but also didn’t freak out when I pushed. If she had been super adamant I would have backed off.

So yes- in your case- I would push. But since she’s in 5th give her some guidelines- you only have to do it for this season (or a month) if you hate it, you can quit. Etc

Is there a friend who would be willing to try sport b with her? That is the approach I would take.

And let her love sport A.

Anonymous wrote:suggest it but dont push it

and let your kid play the sports she loves. who cares if she's not that good. she likes it.

This 100%

Of course you can suggest. If not, what are we here for.

Kids who are obsessed train all year.

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to leave out specifics in hopes of getting relatively unbiased answers.

My 5th grader is obsessed with Sport A. She is now in the off season for the sport but will probably do some training before it resumes. Odds are not good that she will ever be able to play Sport A on the level she says she wants to.

I think she should try Sport B this winter. She hasn't done this sport before, but (to me) it looks like a lot of fun. It is a rec sport, fairly low commitment, and being a beginner will not be a problem. Sport B would be over before Sport A is back in season. If she were to enjoy Sport B and pursue it further, she might be able to play Sport B in high school, as it is not as popular as Sport A.

5th grader has chosen activities on her own up to this point and tends to have set ideas about herself. I can easily see her saying she is "not a Sport B person." I am the opposite of a tiger mom and have never pushed my kids to do things (OK, except finish the session for a class they ended up not enjoying!), so it makes me feel kind of sick to even say something as mild as "hey, I really think you should try this." It somehow feels unethical to "push" new things at all, but I also think I'm being ridiculous! Surely other people--people who are not crazy tiger parents--say "try this, I bet it'll be fun" and feel totally fine about it.

Thoughts? Stories of what happened when you "suggested" your kids do something new?

I wanted my kid to do the same. Bribbed him. Said he could get something special if he committed to the season (weekend trip with dad to big city he had always wanted to visit). He did it. Is totally committed to sport B now.

Of course you can suggest, but not force, something to your kid.

She’s in 5th grade. Don’t give up on her potential. Let her play the sport she likes.

Can she play a all year?

suggest it but dont push it

and let your kid play the sports she loves. who cares if she's not that good. she likes it.

I'm going to leave out specifics in hopes of getting relatively unbiased answers.

My 5th grader is obsessed with Sport A. She is now in the off season for the sport but will probably do some training before it resumes. Odds are not good that she will ever be able to play Sport A on the level she says she wants to.

I think she should try Sport B this winter. She hasn't done this sport before, but (to me) it looks like a lot of fun. It is a rec sport, fairly low commitment, and being a beginner will not be a problem. Sport B would be over before Sport A is back in season. If she were to enjoy Sport B and pursue it further, she might be able to play Sport B in high school, as it is not as popular as Sport A.

5th grader has chosen activities on her own up to this point and tends to have set ideas about herself. I can easily see her saying she is "not a Sport B person." I am the opposite of a tiger mom and have never pushed my kids to do things (OK, except finish the session for a class they ended up not enjoying!), so it makes me feel kind of sick to even say something as mild as "hey, I really think you should try this." It somehow feels unethical to "push" new things at all, but I also think I'm being ridiculous! Surely other people--people who are not crazy tiger parents--say "try this, I bet it'll be fun" and feel totally fine about it.

Thoughts? Stories of what happened when you "suggested" your kids do something new?