Why would you disregard your doctor’s advice over what you think you see online? Who do you think sees more pregnant women, you or your doctor?

^so really, everything I listed above occurred to a group of just *four* women in the last six years (because one of us had no issues)

I don’t know about 45+, but in my close group of late-30’s~early-40yo’s, exactly ONE has had uneventful pregnancies/deliveries resulting in now-healthy kids. Between the 5 of us, we’ve experienced a combined 13 years of clinical infertility. In the last 6 years alone you’re looking at 9 IUIs, 6 rounds of IVF, 5 miscarriages, 4 invasive infant/toddler surgeries, 3 C-sections, 3 failed embryo transfers, and 2 NICU stays. But at the playground you would just see five happy, healthy, fit, DCUM-UMC families with young kids and slightly older parents. Remember the celebrities can pay out of pocket for ALL of the best assistance when it comes to medical care including specialty monitoring and other services that *should* be—but is not—routinely covered by insurance, and/or surrogates who are younger and have a proven ability to carry multiple pregnancies to term, household management, leisure time, nutrition, and on and on….My point is that these are people with all of the resources to mitigate many of the risks of high-risk pregnancies. OP, don’t wait.

A friend of mine had children at 49 (twins). She had to use IVF, and one of them is healthy and one of them is severely disabled. Her life is a bit of a nightmare.

Every year after 35, the fertility, fetal, maternal, and neonatal risks and complications rise.

You absolutely can have a healthy baby at 40 or 42, it is just that the chances of problems and complications is higher.

I wouldn’t be surprised if you have trouble conceiving even now. Sorry, but as someone who had unexplained infertility at age 30, I am shocked anyone things they will have an easy time conceiving at age 40. The people you see becoming first-time moms at 45+, you so not know the route they took to get there: IUI? IVF? Donor eggs? Other?

The risk of having a baby goes up with age. Fertility isn’t forever. This is basic science and knowledge

Do you understand observation bias?

You see the live kids and the mothers who had them in their 40s. A LOT paid for IVF, which is financially, physically and emotionally difficult, and doesn't always work.

Do you see all the miscarriages? The stillbirths? The heartbreak? Believe me, they're all around you. Mothers of all ages, but particularly older ones, will chat with you, smile and go about their lives, and you have no idea how many miscarriages they've had and what they went through.

How could OP not realize that the risks go up? Is she living in a cave?

Your perception is biased because you only see successes and not failures.

Women who can have healthy babies later may have different genetics than average.

At your age, they recommend fertility testing if you haven't conceived in 6 months.

You do not want to get involved with the fertility industrial complex. It's an emotional wringer.

If you want to birth kids, start now.

She's right. I've had 5 miscarriages in my 40s.
Two live births before that.

If you want a kid, it's now.

Your increase in chance of miscarriage also goes up - believe me, that is really awful to experience, too. And wastes even more of your time window.

This has to be a troll post. Ffs.

Yes that's on the late side. Look at fertility stats not random infuencers.

I have no idea where you are seeing 45+ besides celebrities.

I went for my yearly visit and she was very frank about it needing to happen soon. She apologized for being pushy but said the chances of chromosomal abnormalities hits very hard at 40 and the curve goes up and up and up.

I was shocked or surprised given how many women I see online having children at 45+ in recent years. These being healthy children as well.