Anonymous wrote:Currently they don’t have chores because there aren’t really any chores I need their help outside of picking up dry cleaning or running to the shore occasionally but I’d love us to cook together or something

Running the the shore? Wut

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a 13 year old and would not let them participate in an activity that got them home at 10PM on a school night. His Scout meetings get him home close to 9 PM and I am not thrilled with that, he is in a leadership role so has to stay to help with cleaning and shutting down the meetings.

I would contact the Church and ask if they can start earlier or have a group that starts earlier for kids who can attend earlier. I suspect that they are starting later to accommodate older teens with sports and after school activities that cannot make a 7PM start time. I know that we have Scouts who end up missing an entire season of meetings for Marching Band or a sport.

Agree. The other aspect that I didn't love about Young Life is that there was a lot of mixing between the ages, in a way that isn't always appropriate at that age. My daughter had an older teen develop a crush on her, and it was a lot to manage. So, I would push to have a meeting for younger teens that ends earlier.

This is a nice thing about larger youth groups - they're more broken up by age.

Anonymous wrote:I have a 13 year old and would not let them participate in an activity that got them home at 10PM on a school night. His Scout meetings get him home close to 9 PM and I am not thrilled with that, he is in a leadership role so has to stay to help with cleaning and shutting down the meetings.

I would contact the Church and ask if they can start earlier or have a group that starts earlier for kids who can attend earlier. I suspect that they are starting later to accommodate older teens with sports and after school activities that cannot make a 7PM start time. I know that we have Scouts who end up missing an entire season of meetings for Marching Band or a sport.

Agree. The other aspect that I didn't love about Young Life is that there was a lot of mixing between the ages, in a way that isn't always appropriate at that age. My daughter had an older teen develop a crush on her, and it was a lot to manage. So, I would push to have a meeting for younger teens that ends earlier.

My Protestant kids are at a Christian school as well as I feel that Sunday morning church and one other Christian group activity is more than sufficient (church by itself would really be enough but the community aspect is nice). So in your case it would be either youth group or Young Life - pick one.

For a 13yr old, ours will be in bed at 9pm, so activities that run later would be skipped.

I have a 13 year old and would not let them participate in an activity that got them home at 10PM on a school night. His Scout meetings get him home close to 9 PM and I am not thrilled with that, he is in a leadership role so has to stay to help with cleaning and shutting down the meetings.

I would contact the Church and ask if they can start earlier or have a group that starts earlier for kids who can attend earlier. I suspect that they are starting later to accommodate older teens with sports and after school activities that cannot make a 7PM start time. I know that we have Scouts who end up missing an entire season of meetings for Marching Band or a sport.

Sit down asca family and prioritize. Cut something,

My kids have always been fine with times like this but I struggle with the driving and that’s where I start drawing the line with too many late nights. I have to get up early for work and it’s hard for me. It’s always been sports in our house and the multiple nights at the 10pm hour are horrible because then it takes me a while to settle down for bed.

Currently they don’t have chores because there aren’t really any chores I need their help outside of picking up dry cleaning or running to the shore occasionally but I’d love us to cook together or something

This is not a religious thing. It's a generalized problem due to too many options and too much pressure to always be doing something. We're low-energy introverts and have always made conscious choices not to participate if it restricts sleep or relaxed meals. Seems basic, but it's mind-boggling how many kids do without these essentials.

I don't think this problem is unique to religion. Teens are just really busy these days, even in families that tried/try to emphasize family time/dinners, limit activities, etc.

If they really love that one particular activity on Mondays, I'd probably allow it as long as all nights are not like that and they are staying caught up on school work. Can they do chores at other times?

Grades are fine but they do seem really tired in the mornings

13yo above, not 23. Typo

How old are they?
My 23yo is not doing an activity every Monday til 10pm. I’d feel differently if she was 16 maybe.
Are they acting tired? Complaining about getting up? Grades dropping?

We are religious (Protestant) and my kids love both our church youth group and Young Life and do the camps for both in the summer but it seems like there are way too many of these activities and we need to scale back a bit. Neither of my kids are super serious athletes but do also have sports and homework and I just feel like we’re all over the place too much and going to bed too late. Young Life is on Mondays which is particularly annoying because they don’t get home until 10pm or later then are at school again at 7.

Don’t get me wrong I love that they care about religious things and their grades are fine but I just think it’s too much socializing during the week and I’d also love them to contribute more around the house and have dinner together more often. Also would love for them to diversify their interests. What are your rules about religious ECs