Anonymous wrote:what does it mean when a coach sends someone an email telling them they’re pausing the recruiting for now? What does a pause mean? Has anybody dealt with an Ivy League school telling them that they’re on pause for recruiting?

They are done with you. Move forward.

Anonymous wrote:what does it mean when a coach sends someone an email telling them they’re pausing the recruiting for now? What does a pause mean? Has anybody dealt with an Ivy League school telling them that they’re on pause for recruiting?

It means, they are done for now, and will be done for the class if everyone academically qualifies. However, they may still want to stay in touched with top uncommitted players incase some of their commits SAT/ACT scores don't hit their needed targets or their GPA slips from current levels.

We heard something similar to that from Dartmouth last here. However, about a day later, my daughter committed to a schools she liked better so it wasn't a factor.

what does it mean when a coach sends someone an email telling them they’re pausing the recruiting for now? What does a pause mean? Has anybody dealt with an Ivy League school telling them that they’re on pause for recruiting?

Anonymous wrote:forgetting that DI lacrosse coaches are all part of a culture that frowns upon being organized, professional, and accountable to anything ever.

Being able to wear stretch sweatpants to work every day, should have been a dead giveaway. Such power these folks have over the kids. Can't return an email or follow through on anything. Then bad mouth the kid and family when they choose another program. Truly awful process.

And my kid ended up at their dream school playing at a high level before you all jump all over this.

Completely agree! And what exactly is so hard about returning an email? Basic common courtesy! Frustrating to say the least..

Anonymous wrote:forgetting that DI lacrosse coaches are all part of a culture that frowns upon being organized, professional, and accountable to anything ever.

Being able to wear stretch sweatpants to work every day, should have been a dead giveaway. Such power these folks have over the kids. Can't return an email or follow through on anything. Then bad mouth the kid and family when they choose another program. Truly awful process.

And my kid ended up at their dream school playing at a high level before you all jump all over this.

No sarcasm intended at all, but am super happy for your DS or DD. The process is horrible.

forgetting that DI lacrosse coaches are all part of a culture that frowns upon being organized, professional, and accountable to anything ever.

Being able to wear stretch sweatpants to work every day, should have been a dead giveaway. Such power these folks have over the kids. Can't return an email or follow through on anything. Then bad mouth the kid and family when they choose another program. Truly awful process.

And my kid ended up at their dream school playing at a high level before you all jump all over this.

Anonymous wrote:Getting call from coach about how excited they are and how great a player you are but then they pick someone else before you get a chance to get on campus…

Same for us. 12 AM text from his #1. Great early AM meeting on 9/1 with that school. "Tell us which of the following 3 weekends you can come visit." We tell them we can make 1st, 2nd or 3rd weekend work. They tell us to come the 2nd weekend, and they'll get back to us with visit details. 2 days before we're to arrive, we're told we shouldn't come because they have an offer out and they don't want to waste our time. Suggest we keep the following weekend free and sit tight. 5 days later they call and say the other player took the offer. "But, we love you! You're our 2nd choice if something falls through!"

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Getting call from coach about how excited they are and how great a player you are but then they pick someone else before you get a chance to get on campus…

This is why if it is one of your top schools you must get to the campus as quick as you can —-don’t delay because if someone else gets there and they connect and have good chemistry with that player and like the family they will make an offer! Coach is not going to wait for you! The coaches want to be wanted and want you to be eager for their program as well and you show that eagerness by getting there as quick as you can if you delay or hesitate that signals to them that you prefer somewhere else.

+1

Anonymous wrote:Getting call from coach about how excited they are and how great a player you are but then they pick someone else before you get a chance to get on campus…

This is why if it is one of your top schools you must get to the campus as quick as you can —-don’t delay because if someone else gets there and they connect and have good chemistry with that player and like the family they will make an offer! Coach is not going to wait for you! The coaches want to be wanted and want you to be eager for their program as well and you show that eagerness by getting there as quick as you can if you delay or hesitate that signals to them that you prefer somewhere else.

Getting call from coach about how excited they are and how great a player you are but then they pick someone else before you get a chance to get on campus…

Getting calls or texts and then getting ghosted is the worse part. Almost everyone experiences it in one form or another. It's not malicious but is still tough on a 16-17 year old.

Anonymous wrote:All the usual list of the horribles. Injuries, parent(s) killing a recruiting opportunity through their "help", kid destroying an opportunity, coach/ school rescinding an offer.

Think it and I/ we've seen it.

+1

It was like a bad dating show, you think you’re a great match and suddenly they’re ghosting you but totally into your best friend. It worked out, but with the nice guy you thought was just a friend after lots of heartbreak.

All the usual list of the horribles. Injuries, parent(s) killing a recruiting opportunity through their "help", kid destroying an opportunity, coach/ school rescinding an offer.

Think it and I/ we've seen it.

I keep hearing how brutal the process is and how difficult it is. I also keep thinking how young these kids are when they’re going through this recruiting. I’m hoping to hear from families that can share some of the awful situations or things that happened to them. What was the worst thing that happened to your player during recruiting?