Anonymous wrote:If his friends are all talking about fighting, then it’s to be expected that he would do the same. You could teach him how playing about fighting and actual fighting are two very different things?

He has autism and we’re already teaching a million social skills. It’s on the list, but the list gets longer every year, rather than shorter every year. It takes him more work to learn fewer social skills than my other child, who is typically developing. So he runs a deficit every year, even with therapy. Over the years, it’s added up.

If his friends are all talking about fighting, then it’s to be expected that he would do the same. You could teach him how playing about fighting and actual fighting are two very different things?

Anonymous wrote:What non-violent things are your boys into? Mine is attracted to IP that involves fighting, despite us not allowing most video games in the house. Roblox, Fortnite, Minecraft, etc. Apparently, he’s played Minecraft at friends’ houses. I don’t think he’s even seen Fortnite or Roblox, but he talks about the battles. I am deeply uncomfortable with the content. I’d like to foster more positive interests. He’s into Lego, but now it’s Minecraft Lego. I’d appreciate anything that avoids weapons and fighting. He is in third.

Anonymous wrote:What does "IP" mean?

Intellectual property.

Iditerod Prep
Independent Pooping
Intellectual Panhandling

What does "IP" mean?

We struggle with this a ton. Mine basically only wants to be in competitions. So he loves sports, or races or wrestling, but only things that require someone to compete against. It works great if his siblings are available, or we can do a playdate.

Without that, he will play LEGOs on his own, he will read (prefers Wings of Fire and Percy Jackson), and then he will (if bored long enough) enact pretend competitions. So he will pretend to be playing soccer/football/ninja warrior with others. He's also in third.

I think competitions and fighting are basically the same drive in boys. I try to get him around other kids as much as possible, but also try to remind him that he has to find his own things to do when he's bored.

Thank you for all the great suggestions! Keep em coming.

Some boys can be enticed to play with puzzles. Maps and ecosystems are popular topics.

Also maybe racing games/Hot Wheel tracks.

Pokemon can be a bit questionable but the fighting is more strategic than vicious. And the animals and lore are cool.

Sorry the link is quirky.

Anyway, the public library and school library will have these.

One son of mine got interested in The Sims video game. That is not violent.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warriors_(novel_series)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warriors_(novel_series)

Battling cat books will foster reading. Still involves battling though.

The Warrior Cat series - probably 30 novel-length books - find them at the public library.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warriors_(novel_series)#:~:text=Warriors%20(also%20known%20as%20Warrior,www.warriorcats.com

What non-violent things are your boys into? Mine is attracted to IP that involves fighting, despite us not allowing most video games in the house. Roblox, Fortnite, Minecraft, etc. Apparently, he’s played Minecraft at friends’ houses. I don’t think he’s even seen Fortnite or Roblox, but he talks about the battles. I am deeply uncomfortable with the content. I’d like to foster more positive interests. He’s into Lego, but now it’s Minecraft Lego. I’d appreciate anything that avoids weapons and fighting. He is in third.