My personal cut off is 40, but I understand everyone is on a different timeline.

This really depends on personal circumstances but I had my third at 35. My oldest has some special needs and being a parent has exhausted and aged me - I can’t imagine first having multiple kids in my 40s but I think childless people are generally more youthful than people their age with kids, so maybe their energy levels as parents of small kids in their forties is fine.

I know plenty of people who had 1,2,3,4,5 or 6 in the mid 40s, like 45 or 46. The families are happy and healthy.

I think it’s unethical to have a child if you’re over 50. Irrelevant if you’re the mom or dad of adopting or surrogacy.

Over 45, I think it’s pretty borderline. In most cases, I think that’s too old, but maybe.

If you’re both under 45 and can get pregnant naturally, power to you.

Other than that, try away if that’s what you want. But I would strongly recommend that anyone starting down the road of infertility make themselves some limits of how much time or dollars you’d spend.. Irrelevant of your age. Just for your mental health.

The Shady Grove shared risk pool is great for this. We decided we would try within those confines and it worked out, but it also gave us agreed upon stop metrics.

45/46

I finally had a baby at 45 after years of IVF.

For your first, 40. For your second or any there after, 38.

Just my opinion though, based on what I've seen. I had my first at 28 and second at 31 and was done.

It’s situational. At 38 with 2 kids already, you are tempting fate. I wouldn’t do it. Plus a third is a lot more work and logistical headaches. And 4? No way, no how, at any age.

My cut off for my second was 42 and we didn't make it. I had my first at 37.

If it had been my first I probably would have tried until 44. I'm now 46 and know that would have been incredibly hard on my body (I had a bunch of health issues at 45 that seemingly came out of nowhere, the idea of dealing with them immediately postpartum sounds pretty rough) but I also know it would have been worth it if that was my only change to have a biological child. I would 100% consider adopting as well, I don't think biological kids are better or something, but I did actually appreciate the experience of pregnancy, childbirth, and breastfeeding and am glad I got to do it.

Anonymous wrote:I got pregnant accidentally at 39 so….

This happened to my friend at 42.

I gave myself until 35 for DC1, and 38 for DC2. Both were conceived within 4 months of trying.

I had DC1 2.5 months before turning 35, and DC#2 two weeks before turning 38.

I'm 35 and I have two (4 and 1). Around 37/38 I'll be making sure there are NO babies after that.

When my body just stopped responding. 5 miscarriages so far, I think I'm done.

I got pregnant accidentally at 39 so….

38 if I were deciding on to have a 3rd or 4 4th.

Maybe 43 if I were trying for my first/only.