I would not stay married to someone who did not file and pay his taxes on time.

Has he paid estimated or just not done anything?

Look, it’s not the worst thing. He can recover from this. So can your family. But it won’t get better from waiting and he’s not going to get it together on his own.

You’re going to have to help him. Tell him that you don’t have to get all the details and file yet. Just get whatever records he has to get a ballpark estimate of his income and expenses so you can start paying something.

This is a mess which is now yours to deal with and a turnoff

Good luck though.

Yikes! If he has not paid in five years, 5 k is barely going to make a dent. Also, please tell him that he will be paying interest and paying much more than if he had just done this from the beginning. And, if he is not paying taxes he is not paying in to social security….if he continues on that path then at retirement he will not get it or very little!

If he ever does get a traditional job, the IRS may be able to garnish those wages to collect on back taxes, and I think I have heard they can claim your bank accounts. Again, I am not 100 sure but I feel like I have heard these stories.

I am self- employed. I have to pay federal income tax, also the employers portion, and finally state. I pay quite a bit. Every year I set up 4 withdrawals ( the site lets you set 4 quarterly payment dates) and then I note these on my calendar. So, I know every 3 months I have a payment of 10k on x date.

Every month, I have an automatic transfer of 3k+ go to my linked savings account which is the account the taxes come out of. I use this account only for taxes.

He needs discipline. I understand it’s easy to feel like the money you earn is “ all” yours but when you work for an employer they take taxes. It’s the same thing.

If he will not then I’d consult a tax advisor or lawyer and see if you should file single so that you are not liable for his debt to the IRS.

Handyman business like himself or with employees? If just himself set up an account online and view all the 1099s that were issued to him. Ballpark what you think the rest of the revenue was and a reasonable amount of expenses and just be done with it. As long as it is reasonably believable he will be way less likely to be audited than if he doesn't file at all and they issue an assessment against him based on the 1099s they have.

Anonymous wrote:We were married in 2022 and so I started filing taxes as "married filing separately" in 2023. My husband has not filed his taxes since 2020, mainly because he has a handyman business and is not good with paperwork. It drives me crazy because I fear he is going to owe a lot of money to the IRS once he does eventually get caught up. No matter how much I nag him, he just keeps avoiding it. Even his father has gotten on his case about doing his taxes. His father offered to give him $5,000 to get his taxes in order. My husband keeps saying that he will do it and if he owes money, he will just get on a payment plan with the IRS and it won't affect me or our two children. What would you do if your spouse was so far behind and dragging his feet?

I would find an accountant and make an appointment for him.

Is he paying taxes and just not filing or just not paying taxes? Big difference. If you have payed what you owe and just don’t file there’s no real penalty

This is me. I have ADHD and I have my own business where I need to pay taxes on a regular basis. It's hard. I keep trying - then going on a payment plan - paying it off, and it happens again. i'm trying. But it's an ongoing battle with myself.

Anonymous wrote:Do the taxes?

She can’t do them without all the info from her DH.

Do the taxes?

Sorry this is crazy

All payment plans end up costing money. This isn't "free" help. He will need to pay interest! An involuntary income reduction on his part will impact you and the kids. Sounds like he's not being honest with himself or you. This is very serious. You need to sit him down and tell him he's not being a responsible adult here.

Is his ADHD apparent to you in other aspects of his life, OP? Because this is very clearly what it is. I am telling you this because ADHD is never contained to one issue. It's likely bleeding over to other things. All paperwork, as you said, but perhaps problems at work, management, organization, dealing with chores, parenting, being on time, forgetting stuff...

It's hard to live with someone like this. Perhaps he's going to need meds for his ADHD, or some sort of organizational coaching, or something else (the something else being perhaps divorce, if he can't get his act together).

But right now he definitely needs help filing taxes, such as hiring an accountant. Better to hire one now than to pay even more interest by putting off tax payments until even later.

This is a mental health issue. I know of two men who did this.

It is not life-threatening. Keep reminding yourself of that.

In your shoes, I would ask to help and become the accountant myself.

Be prepared to discover debt. Most likely it's easier to live off the money that would have been paid to taxes. If there's a huge gap, ask your father-in-law to help with monthly payment to IRS money. Don't take a lump sum unless it would wipe out the debt.

He can fix his taxes. He cannot fix what makes him drag his feet. He will be behind again soon.

We were married in 2022 and so I started filing taxes as "married filing separately" in 2023. My husband has not filed his taxes since 2020, mainly because he has a handyman business and is not good with paperwork. It drives me crazy because I fear he is going to owe a lot of money to the IRS once he does eventually get caught up. No matter how much I nag him, he just keeps avoiding it. Even his father has gotten on his case about doing his taxes. His father offered to give him $5,000 to get his taxes in order. My husband keeps saying that he will do it and if he owes money, he will just get on a payment plan with the IRS and it won't affect me or our two children. What would you do if your spouse was so far behind and dragging his feet?