Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:26     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH and I just completed a large addition on a SFH in close in Alexandria. We've owned the house for 15 years, it was 85% paid off, we have one kid entering a state school in 10 days, our retirement is extremely healthy, live frugally, had deferred maintenance that made no sense to do on a tiny house (windows were 60 years old, roof 22, exterior needed paint, , etc etc. It all made sense

But, I've had at least three people make really odd comments like "Ohhh, did you really need to do that?", "I mean you were doing fine, why spend all that?" etc

I'm taking it as jealousy or simple social gaffs but how would you respond to such stupid people?


Just people with a lack of anything to say feeling the need to say something. Inconsiderate Politeness.


DCUM would be offended if they said nothing, or smiled, or said it was nice. You really can’t win on DCUM in the compliment arena: something is always going to offend someone!


OMuhGerd, how dare you say that! :Huffs:
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:25     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
You could tell them:
College is fully funded
You have money set aside to help your DC buy their first home
Your retirement is funded
We aren't worried about our employment
We don't need to give money to support aging parents.

People can think it wasn't a rational decision. It wasn't a responsible decision. If they knew more about your financial situation they wouldn't think that.

Of course it's not normal to reveal all of the above. But the point is, they don't know. Don't know you well enough to know whether it was a good idea to renovate like you did, or not.
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:23     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
Because it looks like crap?
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:19     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
It's rude. Maybe they just think the timing is weird to do it as you're becoming empty nesters, but they shouldn't have said that.

Enjoy the house! It sounds great!
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:19     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
They shouldn't have said it, but it slipped out. They think you did too much. I don't think it's jealousy. Do you also wonder if you did too much renovation on a not-fantastic-in-some-way-that-we-on-DCUM-don't-know-about house?
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:14     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH and I just completed a large addition on a SFH in close in Alexandria. We've owned the house for 15 years, it was 85% paid off, we have one kid entering a state school in 10 days, our retirement is extremely healthy, live frugally, had deferred maintenance that made no sense to do on a tiny house (windows were 60 years old, roof 22, exterior needed paint, , etc etc. It all made sense

But, I've had at least three people make really odd comments like "Ohhh, did you really need to do that?", "I mean you were doing fine, why spend all that?" etc

I'm taking it as jealousy or simple social gaffs but how would you respond to such stupid people?


Just people with a lack of anything to say feeling the need to say something. Inconsiderate Politeness.


DCUM would be offended if they said nothing, or smiled, or said it was nice. You really can’t win on DCUM in the compliment arena: something is always going to offend someone!
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:13     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
Maybe that thought your house looked very nice before!
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:11     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
Anonymous wrote:DH and I just completed a large addition on a SFH in close in Alexandria. We've owned the house for 15 years, it was 85% paid off, we have one kid entering a state school in 10 days, our retirement is extremely healthy, live frugally, had deferred maintenance that made no sense to do on a tiny house (windows were 60 years old, roof 22, exterior needed paint, , etc etc. It all made sense

But, I've had at least three people make really odd comments like "Ohhh, did you really need to do that?", "I mean you were doing fine, why spend all that?" etc

I'm taking it as jealousy or simple social gaffs but how would you respond to such stupid people?


Just people with a lack of anything to say feeling the need to say something. Inconsiderate Politeness.
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 17:09     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
People are just speaking their truth. Sorry you can't handle it.
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 16:21     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
I think a lot of people in this area feel very unsure about the future right now OP. Think the comments are probably coming from this point of view.
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 16:10     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
Anonymous wrote:sounds like social gaffs. The best thing to say is congrats, it looks great. Folks don’t know how to say nice things to others.


You mean folks don’t understand that nice comes in many forms.
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 16:09     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
Gaffe(s). French word. They like their « e » at the end of many words.

Ignore, OP. They’re just making small talk and want to imply your house was nice to begin with so they don’t come off as saying the original was terrible and the renos are saving the house. You’re taking offense when none is meant.
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 16:04     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
sounds like social gaffs. The best thing to say is congrats, it looks great. Folks don’t know how to say nice things to others.
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 16:02     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
Ignore them

We did the same .
Anonymous
Post 08/19/2025 16:00     Subject: Weirdest Comments After Remodel
DH and I just completed a large addition on a SFH in close in Alexandria. We've owned the house for 15 years, it was 85% paid off, we have one kid entering a state school in 10 days, our retirement is extremely healthy, live frugally, had deferred maintenance that made no sense to do on a tiny house (windows were 60 years old, roof 22, exterior needed paint, , etc etc. It all made sense

But, I've had at least three people make really odd comments like "Ohhh, did you really need to do that?", "I mean you were doing fine, why spend all that?" etc

I'm taking it as jealousy or simple social gaffs but how would you respond to such stupid people?