In 2025, why should a bride’s family pay for the wedding BECAUSE she’s the bride? I’m curious to hear from people who still expect this.

My parents spent $10k per kid on weddings, including my brother's wedding (it went toward his rehearsal dinner and honeymoon - they wanted their wedding gift, like everything, to be even steven between the kids). I think we'll do something similar, but adjust it for inflation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These day most couples pay for their own wedding festivities.

Not in my WASPY family. Parents are still paying for everything. It is a way to "transfer" wealth. It is like helping out with the downpayment for house.

I'm from a MC family. My gift to my DS is a college education with no loans. I could afford to pay for a rehearsal dinner and possibly kick in a bit for a down payment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These day most couples pay for their own wedding festivities.

Not in my WASPY family. Parents are still paying for everything. It is a way to "transfer" wealth. It is like helping out with the downpayment for house.

Only idiot WASPs think a blowout wedding is a wealth transfer. Most everyone in my circle is sinking it into real estate or brokerages for their kids.

None of the parents need to pay for the wedding. If they pay, it is out of the goodness of their heart and the weight of their wallet. No child is owned a wedding by their parents.

We are South Asian and our DD married a WASP American. We decided to pay for our DD's multi-day wedding. Groom's family paid for rehearsal as is their custom. Now my DS is marrying from within our own community. We will follow whatever the bride's side decide. We will spend the same amount that we spent on our DD's wedding (350K). Money not spent will revert back to us. For us non-negotiables are -
- Wedding in a comfortable, convenient, secure and appropriate place so our elderly relatives and small children can attend in comfort. No beach or farm house kind of stuff for us. No castles in remote locations.
- All our relatives, friends and their families will be invited. So venue cannot have space restriction. Willing to pay for that.
- Guests are the most important element of the celebration. The food, venue, drinks, DJ - must reflect that.

Anonymous wrote:These day most couples pay for their own wedding festivities.

Not in my WASPY family. Parents are still paying for everything. It is a way to "transfer" wealth. It is like helping out with the downpayment for house.

These day most couples pay for their own wedding festivities.

$0
The only thing you should “expect” is to pay for your own party. If other people offer money, great! If not, plan what you can afford.

Anonymous wrote:C'mon. you're an adult. pay for your own wedding.
the custom of parents paying for a wedding is back from the days before they paid $100,000+ for a kid's college education. Now it's on you.

My husband's family nicely paid for the rehearsal dinner. My mom bought my wedding dress. Both were generous. My husband and I saved to pay for our wedding.

Nah. I will happily pay for anything my kids need for their weddings. (I have sons.)

My father told me that the custom dated from when parents paid for sons' to go to college and daughters' to get married. He paid for my college, and I graduated in 1989. He did not pay for a wedding (1998), but he did give us money for a honeymoon trip, just because he's a nice guy.

I have two sons and I have told them that we will not be paying anything for a wedding, I think they're a huge waste of money. (I didn't particularly want one, but it was important to DH's family so they paid for quite a bit of it).

C'mon. you're an adult. pay for your own wedding.
the custom of parents paying for a wedding is back from the days before they paid $100,000+ for a kid's college education. Now it's on you.

My husband's family nicely paid for the rehearsal dinner. My mom bought my wedding dress. Both were generous. My husband and I saved to pay for our wedding.

FWIW when our two sons got married, we paid for the rehearsal dinners. One couple were paying for their wedding themselves, the other the brides parents paid.

When our son got married we payed for the rehearsal dinner and offered to help pay for the wedding. They graciously turned us down so we gave the bride and groom a very large wedding check. Every case is different based on finances. Many couple now pay for their own weddings if they are high earners.

Every family and culture is different. there is no normal.

Do groom's parents still pay for rehearsal dinner only or split the wedding costs? What is normal now?