Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's possible to be diagnosed with both a personality disorder and autism. That said, I think autism could also explain a lot of what you have described.

It also seems like people diagnosed with BPD might have undiagnosed autism?

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10295949/

Wow, Thank you.

This was a pretty stunning read and has given me a lot to think about. -OP

That article is riddled with inaccuracy. For example this is not true at all (and not supported by any citations in the article): “For example, intense relationships and superficial friendships, as well as the tendency of acting out instead of verbalizing emotions, even if they are typical features of BPD, are also common in ASD”

It is possible autism could be characterized as a personality type or even personality disorder. But is is very very distinct from BPD. But, because there is so little rigor in diagnosing autism and adhd, it is very possible that your DS was misdiagnosed and has BPD.

The distorted view of reality is really concerning. There's not much you can do with an adult who doesn't want help until they become a danger to self or others, which is the criteria for involuntary hospitalization, which is usually pretty brief. I would look up hospitals near you that follow recent protocols for treating first episodes of psychosis in case it ends up going that way. I would try to keep the lines of communication open. There's a book called I'm Not Crazy, I Don't Need Help with strategies to try to get mentally ill people to get treated, although I didn't have any luck with my relative.

Anonymous wrote:BPD and ASD have a lot of similarities

They actually don’t.

BPD can be misdiagnosed as autism because the autism criteria are very broad. Do any of the autistism characteristics seem accurate to you?

Anonymous wrote:He's part of the epidemic of the lost generation of young American men. He has no place in the world, which causes anxiety and depression. Medication isn't what he needs. He needs a purpose for living.

He has a perfectly good place in the world- he has a job in data science at a tech company that he seems to excel at, plenty of money and opportunity, and friends and a girlfriend, although I suspect that his behavior is going to drive the latter away and I wouldn't blame her. It seems irresponsible to externalize his struggles to some kind of societal explanation, especially since he has clear diagnoses and mental struggles.

He's part of the epidemic of the lost generation of young American men. He has no place in the world, which causes anxiety and depression. Medication isn't what he needs. He needs a purpose for living.

Anonymous wrote:It's possible to be diagnosed with both a personality disorder and autism. That said, I think autism could also explain a lot of what you have described.

It also seems like people diagnosed with BPD might have undiagnosed autism?

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10295949/

Wow, Thank you.

This was a pretty stunning read and has given me a lot to think about. -OP

Anonymous wrote:Depression and anxiety also can look like anger and irritability, especially in men. Is he willing to talk to a therapist or psychiatrist?

In high school he was diagnosed with anxiety and depression and the doctors prescribed medication for both. He took it consistently at the end of HS and I think it helped. In college I believe that he stopped taking it even though prescriptions were being filled, and when I've suggested revisiting medication or even those diagnoses, he has gone on rants about how depression and anxiety aren't real, I'm not a doctor, I don't know anything, etc. I do think this is bigger than just depression and anxiety, though- his perspective on other people and how he fits into things seems to have become really distorted in a way that isn't explained by his autistic traits.

Depression and anxiety also can look like anger and irritability, especially in men. Is he willing to talk to a therapist or psychiatrist?

It's possible to be diagnosed with both a personality disorder and autism. That said, I think autism could also explain a lot of what you have described.

It also seems like people diagnosed with BPD might have undiagnosed autism?

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10295949/

Anonymous wrote:It definitely sounds like there's a psychological component going on. Yes, I think you should worry. Worry enough to get him a psych evaluation. And not the 5150 quickie one, a real fully extensive one.

The one we did in his tween years was an extensive one and lasted 2 days, but I'm sure his age precluded considering things like BPD.

I can't get him to get tested now- he is in his 20s and relatively independent. I'm just wondering what sort of interventions or crises this may lead to. I'm so upset for him but when I've tried to have a calm conversation about his mental state or his behavior, he gets really upset and it becomes intractable.

Anonymous wrote:BPD and ASD have a lot of similarities

Can you say more? My internet research kid of stops where you did.

BPD and ASD have a lot of similarities

It definitely sounds like there's a psychological component going on. Yes, I think you should worry. Worry enough to get him a psych evaluation. And not the 5150 quickie one, a real fully extensive one.

My DS was diagnosed with autism as a tween. The diagnosis made a lot of sense to us at the time, but recently my 20-something’s behavior is making me wonder if it was accurate. Frankly, he has turned unpredictable and sometimes mercurially angry. He is constantly twisting others’ words, getting defensive, picking and escalating arguments, and making odd, manipulative statements. He is hot and cold with relatives and friends and will quickly punish imagined social transgressions or snubs.

I’m starting to wonder if there could be more going on here. His paternal aunt has been in and out of hospitals and inpatient programs for many years and the quiet whispers in the family are that she has borderline personality disorder. Her behavior when she is around is very similar to DS’s. DH claims he doesn’t notice the similarities, but I do.

Is there ever overlap between the two diagnoses? I tried googling it but didn’t find anything conclusive except that other people seem to be asking the same question.

Is this something I should worry about?