Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She wants you to forgive and forget, so she doesn’t have to feel guilty. Sounds like you keep it brief and polite, which is all you need to do.

+1. Cheaters are narcissist. They want to gaslight you even when you are no longer with them. I don't know why we don't classify narcissism as a serious mental illness.

As PP said keep it simple and polite.

This is not useful because it is not true.

I would have a very hard time being friendly with someone who cheated. However, OP, because you posted this, I wonder if you could benefit from some therapy to really process everything. It takes a lot to recover from infidelity. Just because the relationship is done doesn't mean you don’t have work to do.

OP does not need therapy. He is really keeping their relationship strictly about the kids. What does the sl**t need? I wish women treated their ex husbands the same way

Maybe, maybe not. But you certainly do, misogynist f***.

Skank

Interestingly women are the ones saying to keep a cordial relationship and to forgive. This is in line on how women are more likely to remain in a marriage even with a serial cheater.

I nle understand why married men don't fear cheating because apparently all it takes is therapy to satisfy the wife..

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She wants you to forgive and forget, so she doesn’t have to feel guilty. Sounds like you keep it brief and polite, which is all you need to do.

+1. Cheaters are narcissist. They want to gaslight you even when you are no longer with them. I don't know why we don't classify narcissism as a serious mental illness.

As PP said keep it simple and polite.

This is not useful because it is not true.

I would have a very hard time being friendly with someone who cheated. However, OP, because you posted this, I wonder if you could benefit from some therapy to really process everything. It takes a lot to recover from infidelity. Just because the relationship is done doesn't mean you don’t have work to do.

OP does not need therapy. He is really keeping their relationship strictly about the kids. What does the sl**t need? I wish women treated their ex husbands the same way

Maybe, maybe not. But you certainly do, misogynist f***.

Anonymous wrote:We aren’t friends but I don’t go out of my way to avoid him. I don’t talk to him about anything outside of kid logistics, don’t text pictures of the kids, etc.

I don’t know how to explain it but I feel very meh. It’s a very different feeling than being upset over the cheating. It’s more that I’m just very bored with him. I find it all very boring. Someone once explained it like when you’re a kid and you have that one uncle that bloviates, and you just find the whole thing very boring and have more fun things to do.

That being said, it does help that I had a glow-up after we split and I’ve moved on and am dating several men who are more attractive and/or richer than xH. His AP was a downgrade and even she bailed when faced with the reality of dating a man with kids.

Looks like he lingered in your mind for awhile

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She wants you to forgive and forget, so she doesn’t have to feel guilty. Sounds like you keep it brief and polite, which is all you need to do.

+1. Cheaters are narcissist. They want to gaslight you even when you are no longer with them. I don't know why we don't classify narcissism as a serious mental illness.

As PP said keep it simple and polite.

This is not useful because it is not true.

I would have a very hard time being friendly with someone who cheated. However, OP, because you posted this, I wonder if you could benefit from some therapy to really process everything. It takes a lot to recover from infidelity. Just because the relationship is done doesn't mean you don’t have work to do.

OP does not need therapy. He is really keeping their relationship strictly about the kids. What does the sl**t need? I wish women treated their ex husbands the same way

We are in very good terms, we talk often.

1. I never felt cheated on. He had serious issues he felt with them by cheating. No different than an addict.

2. He’s not with an OW.

3. He immediately went into intense therapy for a very serious mental illness,

We are fine not living together.

We also didn’t need child support or alimony.

He left with his $ I left with mine. 50/50 for house. I kept my retirement, he kept his. Nobody is a burden to the other.

Split college 50/50.

It's good for younger kids if you can be reasonably cordial. There are lots of times we are supporting our kids together and I can stand with him and make polite small talk

But he lost my trust forever and I'm happy that I am no longer married to him

We aren’t friends but I don’t go out of my way to avoid him. I don’t talk to him about anything outside of kid logistics, don’t text pictures of the kids, etc.

I don’t know how to explain it but I feel very meh. It’s a very different feeling than being upset over the cheating. It’s more that I’m just very bored with him. I find it all very boring. Someone once explained it like when you’re a kid and you have that one uncle that bloviates, and you just find the whole thing very boring and have more fun things to do.

That being said, it does help that I had a glow-up after we split and I’ve moved on and am dating several men who are more attractive and/or richer than xH. His AP was a downgrade and even she bailed when faced with the reality of dating a man with kids.

He cheated, he left. He filed for divorce. I asked if we could please keep it civil in light of raising (now grown) kids together and decades of history. Sadly, at least at this point, he has decided I am the antichrist and behaves as such. I can't force him to think or behave the way I would prefer him to be. So I just mind my ps and qs. I'm not angry. Ultimately he did me a huge favor by setting the wheels in motion to end our dysfunctional relationship. Maybe some day he'll do some therapy and come to terms with whatever it is he needs to come to terms with. Short answer: I would not have a problem being on good or at least cordial terms.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She wants you to forgive and forget, so she doesn’t have to feel guilty. Sounds like you keep it brief and polite, which is all you need to do.

+1. Cheaters are narcissist. They want to gaslight you even when you are no longer with them. I don't know why we don't classify narcissism as a serious mental illness.

As PP said keep it simple and polite.

This is not useful because it is not true.

I would have a very hard time being friendly with someone who cheated. However, OP, because you posted this, I wonder if you could benefit from some therapy to really process everything. It takes a lot to recover from infidelity. Just because the relationship is done doesn't mean you don’t have work to do.

Anonymous wrote:Are you still in good terms with your ex spouse if your divorced them due to cheating?

I don't talk to my ex wife. I love my kids more than I dislike her. We only texts briefly for kids logistics, but she always want to extend the texts into kids unrelated sense. I just ignore her. At our daughter middle school graduation, I didn't seat next to her.

Honestly I commend those of you are still friendly with your ex spouse and act as if nothing happened.

You are man and a lot (if not most) men react exactly like you do..Men take cheating extremely personally. Men will endure physical abuse mental abuse from their wife but cheating nope. And also men who were cheated on tend to fall into deeper depression post divorce.

Anonymous wrote:She wants you to forgive and forget, so she doesn’t have to feel guilty. Sounds like you keep it brief and polite, which is all you need to do.

+1. Cheaters are narcissist. They want to gaslight you even when you are no longer with them. I don't know why we don't classify narcissism as a serious mental illness.

As PP said keep it simple and polite.

She wants you to forgive and forget, so she doesn’t have to feel guilty. Sounds like you keep it brief and polite, which is all you need to do.

What you described is the opposite. You are actually in good terms. Bad terms would be an ex spouse completely avoiding a space if the ex will be there (such as birthdays graduations etc), major custody issues that require supervision, insults via texts/emails, stalking, getting into verbal/physical abuse with their new partners etc

What I listed above is sadly very common and the children in these divorces don't do well later in life.

Yeah you guys have a good relationship believe it or not

Are you still in good terms with your ex spouse if your divorced them due to cheating?

I don't talk to my ex wife. I love my kids more than I dislike her. We only texts briefly for kids logistics, but she always want to extend the texts into kids unrelated sense. I just ignore her. At our daughter middle school graduation, I didn't seat next to her.

Honestly I commend those of you are still friendly with your ex spouse and act as if nothing happened.