This is my DH too OP

What happened was and is not okay. Grieving is normal. It's also a very personal impact of a broader catastrophe.

I am a former fed too (though I left years ago without any of these circumstances) and realize it becomes part of your identity too. It will take time for you to develop a new narrative

Wow I couldve written this. I feel seen.

Same op. I do think it’s a grieving process, it was a part of our identity and most of us were very committed to the mission. I’m so glad the pp is feeling better. I am very, very grateful for the choice I made it was the right call for me in the role I was in but I wish this hadn’t all happened and things were different.

I feel the exact same way, OP.

Anonymous wrote:I'm glad I chose to stay and stick it out. Much of the pressure from a few months ago has faded, despite the changes. I transferred to a less high-profile division, which has helped some with feeling conflicted with some of things I was seeing.

I have zero respect for this administration, but I've found a way to get through it by keeping my head down, doing my eight hours, and leaving.

Even traffic is better, although I think that's just because of summer and school being out.

This! I agree.

Hey, cheer up! You’re bringing shareholders money and working hard to increase your CEO’s compensation. You will be rewarded with a pizza lunch. It’s all good!

Anonymous wrote:Not only did you lose something, you lost it because someone intentionally tried to hurt you. That's what DOGE did. It was designed to painfully take things away from hard-working people, in order to demoralize, in the belief that it would help them electorally.

I’m sorry for your loss OP and for all the great federal government workers who were callously and thoughtlessly cut. Our nation will be all the poorer having lost dedicated public servants and for losing generations of talent to come now that this administration has shown that the Government is not a reliable employer.

I'm glad I chose to stay and stick it out. Much of the pressure from a few months ago has faded, despite the changes. I transferred to a less high-profile division, which has helped some with feeling conflicted with some of things I was seeing.

I have zero respect for this administration, but I've found a way to get through it by keeping my head down, doing my eight hours, and leaving.

Even traffic is better, although I think that's just because of summer and school being out.

I feel the same way. I am really happy about my new job and am SO lucky to have landed it but I mourn my old job and mission. Millions of people have also been directly hurt by the attack on my agency and by our work being undone.

It hurts personally that all of this was for no reason at all— not for performance, efficiency, mission, fiscal reasons, nothing. This serves no one and nothing and saved no money. It was just a hilarious joke to a bunch of techno-fascists and it also served the purpose of the Christian fascists who believe in no government and no protection for Americans. It’s very sick.

Not only did you lose something, you lost it because someone intentionally tried to hurt you. That's what DOGE did. It was designed to painfully take things away from hard-working people, in order to demoralize, in the belief that it would help them electorally.

Anonymous wrote:It will take time. It's hard to get over something that has become your "identify".

I was a fed for 7 years and it shaped my worldview permanently. It has also tangentially impacted my son's choice of career.

Doing important things on behalf of others is very motivating.

OP, you might be able to return to government at a later time. And even if not, you can bear witness to others that what the government does is valuable and competent people work there.

Seek therapy.

It will take time. It's hard to get over something that has become your "identify".

You’re grieving. It’s a process. It’s not exactly the same thing, but I worked for a great company that treated its employees well and where we were encouraged to always do right by the customer. It was a wonderful place to work and I intended to stay there until I retired. Then they got acquired by an awful organization and everything went downhill quickly. I literally went through the stages of grief dealing with it. I finally left after about two years of misery. I’m honestly past it now, but it took a long time to get there.

I worked for the federal government the majority of my career so far, and left a few months ago given everything going on. It became very clear to me that I could no longer work there for all the reasons you’d expect - undermining mission, removal of WFH, horrible RIFS, impact on mental health. I’m fortunate I was able to find a new job, but even though I left my agency a few months ago, I find that I am still upset that I felt forced to leave. To be clear, I know I made the right decision to leave and I am not jealous of my former colleagues who are still there. However, I miss my colleagues, the meaning of the work, the feeling that I was doing the RIGHT thing for the American people and pushing forward the right policies. I miss the “what was” before the election. And I do find my new job rewarding….but it’s different. I’m not sure why I haven’t gotten over it yet….I wish I have, but I haven’t. Is anyone else in the same boat?