Anonymous
Post 07/24/2025 19:24     Subject: Making friends as introverts
Anonymous wrote:If you are attractive, people will come to you


Yeah, we all know being attractive is the[i] most important thing.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2025 06:26     Subject: Making friends as introverts
If you are attractive, people will come to you
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2025 02:57     Subject: Making friends as introverts
Anonymous wrote:Join a choral group, tennis team, garden club, walking group, book club, volunteering group. In my City people get together to pick up trash in various areas. It’s really social!


Do you end up meeting these new friends outside of the respective groups as well?

Anonymous
Post 07/22/2025 01:47     Subject: Re:Making friends as introverts
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Start with the activity — and befriend people who share those interests. I’ve made friends through being in a book group, going to alumni activities, and taking music lessons.
how do you meet people by taking a music lesson? Isn’t that just 1 on 1 with the instructor?


In my case, the lessons started at a shop, where I got to chat regularly with the owner and staff as well as other students and teachers. My interest led me to going to concerts, meeting other music lovers and musicians. I ended up with a much wider circle of acquaintances, and a few genuine friendships.

For me, the chance to interact regularly with the same group of people provided a basis that allowed deeper relationships to develop. I also met people through the first group of people, so opportunities for friendships spiraled out from there.


To add, you might not want to get together just to drink, but in the beginning, it helps to have a somewhat defined purpose or structure — without risking too much. When I took a yoga class, for example, another student and I went for tea following the class. So we had a routine activity that allowed us to spend time together and to get to know each other better.
Anonymous
Post 07/22/2025 01:41     Subject: Re:Making friends as introverts
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Start with the activity — and befriend people who share those interests. I’ve made friends through being in a book group, going to alumni activities, and taking music lessons.
how do you meet people by taking a music lesson? Isn’t that just 1 on 1 with the instructor?


In my case, the lessons started at a shop, where I got to chat regularly with the owner and staff as well as other students and teachers. My interest led me to going to concerts, meeting other music lovers and musicians. I ended up with a much wider circle of acquaintances, and a few genuine friendships.

For me, the chance to interact regularly with the same group of people provided a basis that allowed deeper relationships to develop. I also met people through the first group of people, so opportunities for friendships spiraled out from there.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2025 23:49     Subject: Making friends as introverts
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I don't have a friend group. I have individual friends. In a group, I get quiet and drained faster than one on one.


OP here. Same… I’m more talkative now in groups now than I used to be but I still get drained and prefer 1 or 1. I’m feeling the kids pulling away as and will be in college soon-ish and that is making me feel I need to have a friend group where making plans happens more often and more on a regular basis. I think I also want to feel like I belong to a group.

I don’t drink anymore and I also don’t want an exercise group. Volunteering would be good too- any recommendations in the Rockville/Bethesda/Gaithersburg area to meet others in the same phase of life (amongst others)?


I'm not in your area, but I volunteer - one weekday after work at a dog shelter, and on weekend mornings at a farmer's market. I've met people in ALL phases of life, not just the same as mine. Don't limit yourself to thinking you can only be friends with people just like you. I'm 48 and friends with people who are pushing 60 and who just turned 30. People single, divorced, married, with kids, without, whatever. Be open-minded to friends who are different than you are.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2025 23:47     Subject: Making friends as introverts
We're all on here, lol. But I'm many states away.

I feel there are many people here similar to me. It's a pity we can't meet in real life. But my guess is people like digital because it's low effort.

I tried to turn an internet friend into a real friend once. We met for lunch at America in Union Station for lunch (had met on a wedding planning Usenet news group - so it was unlikely there would be any bad surprises). I guess I wasn't as interesting in person. I thought we had a fun lunch but nothing came of it.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2025 23:40     Subject: Re:Making friends as introverts
Anonymous wrote:If you figure it out, let me know. 🤣

I’m at the same life stage as you, and most people seem to be falling into two groups (1) way too much focus on drinking or (2) very heavy focus on fitness/ fitness hobbies (cycling groups, hiking groups, training for marathons, niche fitness studios, CrossFit and so on)

I don’t drink much (or enjoy being around people who drink heavily) and am really not interested in exercise beyond a basic gym routine. So…..




NP. This also describes me!
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2025 22:50     Subject: Making friends as introverts
Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I don't have a friend group. I have individual friends. In a group, I get quiet and drained faster than one on one.


OP here. Same… I’m more talkative now in groups now than I used to be but I still get drained and prefer 1 or 1. I’m feeling the kids pulling away as and will be in college soon-ish and that is making me feel I need to have a friend group where making plans happens more often and more on a regular basis. I think I also want to feel like I belong to a group.

I don’t drink anymore and I also don’t want an exercise group. Volunteering would be good too- any recommendations in the Rockville/Bethesda/Gaithersburg area to meet others in the same phase of life (amongst others)?
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2025 00:52     Subject: Making friends as introverts
Join a choral group, tennis team, garden club, walking group, book club, volunteering group. In my City people get together to pick up trash in various areas. It’s really social!
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2025 00:51     Subject: Making friends as introverts
Honestly, I don't have a friend group. I have individual friends. In a group, I get quiet and drained faster than one on one.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2025 00:08     Subject: Re:Making friends as introverts
Anonymous wrote:Start with the activity — and befriend people who share those interests. I’ve made friends through being in a book group, going to alumni activities, and taking music lessons.
how do you meet people by taking a music lesson? Isn’t that just 1 on 1 with the instructor?
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2025 00:05     Subject: Re:Making friends as introverts
Start with the activity — and befriend people who share those interests. I’ve made friends through being in a book group, going to alumni activities, and taking music lessons.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2025 23:51     Subject: Re:Making friends as introverts
If you figure it out, let me know. 🤣

I’m at the same life stage as you, and most people seem to be falling into two groups (1) way too much focus on drinking or (2) very heavy focus on fitness/ fitness hobbies (cycling groups, hiking groups, training for marathons, niche fitness studios, CrossFit and so on)

I don’t drink much (or enjoy being around people who drink heavily) and am really not interested in exercise beyond a basic gym routine. So…..


Anonymous
Post 07/20/2025 22:20     Subject: Making friends as introverts
How do middle aged introverts (with teen kids) make a friend group with people who like to get together but not necessarily just to drink?