Based on what I've seen as a high school teacher, I think that kids from homes that are stable, and secure, and who know they are loved are less likely to seek adult style relationships early in HS. I am not saying "oh, that mother seems so distant". I'm saying that kids who have jumped from foster home to foster home, or who have experienced abuse, or who were raised by a 13 year old mom who struggled to parent, often struggle to either set boundaries, or respect boundaries, and seek attention and connection at whatever cost, and those things can lead to early sex, sex with multiple partners, sex with inappropriate partners, unprotected sex etc . . .

But I think that taking that, and thinking that you can follow it to an extreme and say that extra cuddling on top of normal loving parenting, will prevent all teenage sex? That's weird.

Parent your infants and toddlers appropriately, which includes some physical affection. Follow their lead to some degree (e.g. don't force cuddles on a kid who doesn't want them). It will have positive outcomes in their lives.

Having said that, there are other factors as well that have nothing to do with parenting. I have one kid who was super cuddly as a young child. I have one kid who was much more physically active, and much more impulsive, and much more courageous. He was just as loved. Our attachment is just as secure. He was just too busy running around and exploring to have time for cuddling. As a young teenager, he continues to be the kid who takes risks, and seeks new sensations, and isn't afraid of consequences. It wouldn't surprise me if he explored physical things earlier than his brother. But I expect that because he's had years of appropriate behavior modeled, when he does it will be safe and consensual.

Your friend is a loon.

Is it supposed to be bad if your teenager wants to date? I wish my teenage boys were a little more interested in dating. It’s weird that they are still hanging out with DH and I every Friday night.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about physical affection per se, but it’s widely known that kids who feel loved. Accepted, and respected in their families don’t seek attention from others (in a romantic sense) until they are adults.

This…is not true. At all.

lol that is unhinged. I get that people might *want* it to be true— but it’s wishful thinking.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about physical affection per se, but it’s widely known that kids who feel loved. Accepted, and respected in their families don’t seek attention from others (in a romantic sense) until they are adults.

Please cite sources ma'am

Try a library.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about physical affection per se, but it’s widely known that kids who feel loved. Accepted, and respected in their families don’t seek attention from others (in a romantic sense) until they are adults.

Please cite sources ma'am

I don’t know about physical affection per se, but it’s widely known that kids who feel loved. Accepted, and respected in their families don’t seek attention from others (in a romantic sense) until they are adults.

This is weird and not a thing, except maybe for your friend.

Imagine cuddling your small child with the intention of preventing early sexual relations, but then hoping your kids want sex as adults enough to give you grand kids and have a good adult relationship. Unless the cuddle mom wants their kid’s sense of intimacy destroyed forever….honestly this premise is gross and creepy.

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like she is assuming only emotionally neglected children grow into teens who are interested in sex. While I think it's great to show kids lots of physical affection and emotional support when their little, I think hormones and biology are what drive teens to be interested in sex and doesn't necessarily mean their parents didn't hug them enough.

+1. The assumption that teenagers have different reasons for having sex than adults seems wrong. Could you cuddle your way out of wanting sex? Some adults could but I don't think it's most, and teenage hormones are worse, not better.

they're *

It sounds like she is assuming only emotionally neglected children grow into teens who are interested in sex. While I think it's great to show kids lots of physical affection and emotional support when their little, I think hormones and biology are what drive teens to be interested in sex and doesn't necessarily mean their parents didn't hug them enough.

Anonymous wrote:Your friend sounds like a molester.

That's a really big leap. Parents aren't allowed to cuddle their babies anymore?

Your friend sounds like a molester.

Parents of teenagers - is there anything to the cuddle theory where if you show your baby and child massive amounts of physical affection they will not want to date and/or be sexually active as teens?

It sounds looney too me but my friend who has kids with a 10 year difference swears by it. But she's always "conducting little science experiments" and "testing out theories" on her kids as she says