What is she doing this summer?

Action absorbs anxiety.

Get more hours at summer job. Or pick up more babysitting hours. Whatever she’s doing.


Take a sat prep class etc

My DD benefitted from a few therapy CBT sessions at the end of Junior year. She was so stressed out socially that she lost weight, was throwing up (anxiety) and basically all over the place.

She got dumped by her BF 3 weeks before AP exams but still managed to get 5's in all her AP's that summer, I honestly don't know how.

But I totally agree, take something off the table like the SAT retake.

Also I don't know if anyone has suggested applying to one of the rolling admissions colleges like Pitt, early in August when it opens. Getting 1 acceptance makes such a huge difference.

Anonymous wrote:due to no fault of my child's (didnt want to date one of the guys who was pursuing her) the whole group stopped being her friends and inviting her to parties, (so much for females sticking up for each other), it was a good life lesson (choose your friends-including female wisely) , but the timing of it at the end of junior year was devastating.

That’s awful. And she is so strong and brave to carve her own path even if it means losing friends, rather than succumbing to peer pressure and societal expectations re dating etc. That’s her essay right there.

Anonymous wrote:so anxious cant study to retake sat, do essay or common app...st8 As, highest courseload and a lot of leadership positions..what do you do? in therapy, looking for better one.
isolating at home, recently lost friends, no fault of the kids, so this makes it even more difficult

Pretty common. I dont care what anybody says here. Help your kid. Anyway you can. Very easy for some kids to just shut down during this process. It is OK to do some handholding here despite what DCummers will tell you.

thank you everyone for the great suggestions

due to no fault of my child's (didnt want to date one of the guys who was pursuing her) the whole group stopped being her friends and inviting her to parties, (so much for females sticking up for each other), it was a good life lesson (choose your friends-including female wisely) , but the timing of it at the end of junior year was devastating.

Lighten the load and get support ASAP. 1) The college process is very overwhelming so break it down into manageable parts with a schedule. 2) get some support asap to help start the essay writing. Having an outside partner to brainstorm ideas and keep the student on track is invaluable. We didnt have a private counselor so i stepped in and helped my kid a lot. We made a college list with deadlines, brainstormed essay topics, activity list wording etc. If you can afford it, hire someone. 3) evaluate the fall academic and ec schedule now and cut things out, drop down a level, etc. Senior fall is brutal with applications and keeping grades strong. (Many colleges request Q1 fall grades). Having the common app essay done by end of summer is helpful. If independent test prep isn't working, get a private tutor or maybe go test optional. Focus on things you can ccontrol. Good luck!

Anonymous wrote:Maybe trying to take a couple things off their plate. Better to lighten the load and have success than for them to break under the heavier one.

This.

Mine was so anxious almost to the point of ulcers. Went TO. Focused on the things that could be controlled. Parents helped out too bc no one needs a breakdown.

Had amazing outcomes.

Talk to your child’s Dr see if they could benefit from meds. Go test optional, stop worrying about SAT scores. Plenty of fine schools out there that are TO. Maybe reach out to a friend or teacher who is a strong writer and have them sit down and brainstorm essay ideas. It’s overwhelming but breaking it down into smaller chunks may help. Make sure you visit a couple safeties that your child can get excited about, to take the pressure off. And I agree with the taking a vacation advice, even a short weekend getaway will help reset everyone in the family and hopefully help your child get into a better headspace. It’s a time of big changes and lots of stress, do some fun things together and reinforce that you’ll love and support them no matter where they end up.

What is the “recently lost friends” bit? Focus on mental health, get her some perspective. Life is long, don’t burn out now.

Seriously. You might want to take a vacation. Somewhere nice, with beach and martini

OP, just to clarify, are you the parent? Or actually the rising senior?

Anxious about what?

That’s what you do first- figure out what’s at the root of this crippling anxiety.

Maybe trying to take a couple things off their plate. Better to lighten the load and have success than for them to break under the heavier one.

so anxious cant study to retake sat, do essay or common app...st8 As, highest courseload and a lot of leadership positions..what do you do? in therapy, looking for better one.
isolating at home, recently lost friends, no fault of the kids, so this makes it even more difficult