Anonymous wrote:Here's what is going on: your toddler is a little bit spastic. Can start out petting gently, and then get carried away and kind of forget. Can pat the dog but forget what patting is and start slapping/hitting. Toddlers love sticking their fingers in holes, and they understand dogs have faces and people have faces, but dogs' faces are different than people-faces and they want to explore by sticking their fingers into the dog nostrils and futzing with the ears, etc. And a tail! It's just begging to be pulled!

So your dog likes your toddler, but is wary. Rightfully so. Your dog understands that for now, they are "older" than your toddler and your toddler doesn't know how to be in charge of them. Your dog is protecting itself from your toddler.

You may not realise, but this is a very offensive term. Like the "R" word.

Friend brought 4 year old over. Cats were intrigued. He reached and and grabbed one on her side like she was a stuffed animal. Cats fled. Never came near ANY children after that.
Cats are not dogs, but toddlers don't know how to touch live animals.

I have older teens and a 5lb chihuahua. We are cautious around him, we stand up carefully, sit down carefully, walk around him carefully. He loves babies and toddlers but prefers staying 2 body lengths away unless he is checking on them/giving them a sniff lick. They just don't have body awareness enough and he gets that. They drop toys, they plop down all the sudden. Sounds like your dog likes calm, controlled movement, and respect of space. When your toddler can also do that, I would guess they will be closer!

Here's what is going on: your toddler is a little bit spastic. Can start out petting gently, and then get carried away and kind of forget. Can pat the dog but forget what patting is and start slapping/hitting. Toddlers love sticking their fingers in holes, and they understand dogs have faces and people have faces, but dogs' faces are different than people-faces and they want to explore by sticking their fingers into the dog nostrils and futzing with the ears, etc. And a tail! It's just begging to be pulled!

So your dog likes your toddler, but is wary. Rightfully so. Your dog understands that for now, they are "older" than your toddler and your toddler doesn't know how to be in charge of them. Your dog is protecting itself from your toddler.

Never let your dog around a toddler, unless you are right there, with arms and eyes on both.

It just takes a second for a tragedy

My uncle had a dog that wouldn't play with me until I was about 5. I didn't live with the dog though. It was very smart (German Shepherd) and used to living only with adults. It didn't like me running after it. I guess I got into its space/facial area and tried to hug it. It never snapped at or bit me. Once I was bigger it would play stick fetch and another game with me.

Sounds like your dog accepts your child but isn't sure what to make of baby lurching around. And might fear rough petting. Babies can't help how they grasp. They have tiny hands and grab clumps of hair.

I don't know what to make of my dog's behavior around our young toddler. He likes to be in the same room as her when she's home (obviously closely supervised, never alone), and when she's at daycare he spends most of the day napping in her room. When they're in the same room she will sometimes try to pet him and he usually moves a few feet away but doesn't leave the room altogether. He doesn't show any signs of stress around her other than this.

Anyone else's dog-toddler relationship like this? How were they together as they got older? While she's really little we make sure she's gentle by moving her if needed, and when she's old enough to understand we will teach her not to chase or grab him.