And yes we have young kids so it's not so simple to just walk away. I would like to know more about what exactly I am dealing with (root of it, extent of it, is it personality disorder etc) before calling it quits.

What is the difference between the types of liars: pathological, compulsive, or just out of convenience? I don't think my husband lies on a daily basis like some compulsive liars. But he lied when he thinks it is just easier than having to deal with or explain the truth. I feel like it stems from some deep conflict avoidance, bad communication skills, and who knows what else. But over time he has become so comfortable lying.

What is the difference between a clinical psychologist and a clinical social worker? I am seeing a lot of therapist who are the latter, and it seems they deal with very similar issues as the former.

I was married to one. When we were divorcing, over many betrayals (sexual, financial, and otherwise), his mother looked at my blankly and said “well, he’s always been a compulsive liar. Since he was a kid.”

After an affair, where he continually lied to me and our therapist, I was done. He was incapable of facing/telling the truth.

Does your husband genuinely want to change? If not, what would the goals of therapy be?

Also, if he’s a compulsive liar and he tells you that he does genuinely want to change, you’ll need to at least consider the possibility that he’s lying.

This isn’t really amenable to therapy — unless someone truly wants to change embedded patterns of behavior, and possibly perceptions. Start with someone who specializes in personality disorders.

You could also consider family or couples therapy— to explore the impact of his behavior on your family.

Or, consider your own individual therapy — to explore what it means for you to be married to a compulsive liar.


If your own physicians can’t recommend some options, you might start with providers who accept your insurance. The American Psychological Association also has an online directory.

This sounds like a personality disorder, which generally cannot be cured. Save yourself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He needs a full evaluation by a psychologist, because there might be a range of diagnoses that can fit this profile. Psychologists are the experts at diagnosing.

Later on, with diagnoses in hand, if pharmaceutical treatment is necessary, he can consult a psychiatrist. Psychiatrists are experts in medication.

Type of therapy will depend on what diagnosis he has. This will be recommended by the psychologist.

You all are experts at only one thing:
maximizing profits.
You don’t cure anything.

Succinctly stated.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He needs a full evaluation by a psychologist, because there might be a range of diagnoses that can fit this profile. Psychologists are the experts at diagnosing.

Later on, with diagnoses in hand, if pharmaceutical treatment is necessary, he can consult a psychiatrist. Psychiatrists are experts in medication.

Type of therapy will depend on what diagnosis he has. This will be recommended by the psychologist.

You all are experts at only one thing:
maximizing profits.
You don’t cure anything.

You missed the part where mental health disorders cannot be cured in the first place. If you don't want to know or get treatment, that's your choice, certainly. But none of this will ever go away - it can just be managed, and management comes easier when you know what you're dealing with exactly.

However for a compulsive liar, if OP is gainfully employed and has no kids, I'd suggest divorce. If kids are in the picture and OP needs more money than what she can earn herself... she might have to stay and deal with the issues.

He doesn't need to see any psych. He just needs to stop lying it's not that hard. If he can't dump him. You can find someone else OP it's okay.

Anonymous wrote:He needs a full evaluation by a psychologist, because there might be a range of diagnoses that can fit this profile. Psychologists are the experts at diagnosing.

Later on, with diagnoses in hand, if pharmaceutical treatment is necessary, he can consult a psychiatrist. Psychiatrists are experts in medication.

Type of therapy will depend on what diagnosis he has. This will be recommended by the psychologist.

You all are experts at only one thing:
maximizing profits.
You don’t cure anything.

Girlllllllllll Divorce.

Psychiatrist & therapist evaluation & treatment for him. Lawyer and therapist for you. You do not want to spend the rest of your life with a compulsive liar, especially if you have kids. Protect yourself asap.

A compulsive liar will not respect “boundaries”. The will just lie about their behavior so as to appear as if they are respecting boundaries.

Personality disorders (like narcissism or borderline) don't respond well to therapy, but the people around them can survive by setting very strict boundaries.

They don't respond to insights into their own behavior, but they will abide by boundaries.

He needs a full evaluation by a psychologist, because there might be a range of diagnoses that can fit this profile. Psychologists are the experts at diagnosing.

Later on, with diagnoses in hand, if pharmaceutical treatment is necessary, he can consult a psychiatrist. Psychiatrists are experts in medication.

Type of therapy will depend on what diagnosis he has. This will be recommended by the psychologist.

He’s telling you he needs help because he can’t be honest with you?

Hi, we are trying to find ana appropriate mental health professional for my husband, who is a compulsive/pathological (?) liar. When I Google this, it seems could be rooted in a bunch of things ranging from trauma, ADHD, narcissistic personality, antisocial personality, psychopathy. Question is, where do we start with finding someone? Would a normal therapist/clinical social worker be good enough? Do we need a psychiatrist?