Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS (16) has recently expressed that he doesn’t want to ever get in a relationship or get married. This is deeply disturbing. Should I put him in therapy?

When your 35 year old says this, believe him, deal with your feelings about not having grandkids, and support his choices.

When your 16 year old says this, offer him a ride to soccer practice or whatever else you were planning to do. It shouldn’t even register except to be glad he is sharing how he thinks.

Agreed. It is crazy to worry about this or think it's "deeply disturbing". In fact, I think I'd be happy my 16 year old wasn't interested in relationships yet.

Anonymous wrote:DS (16) has recently expressed that he doesn’t want to ever get in a relationship or get married. This is deeply disturbing. Should I put him in therapy?

When your 35 year old says this, believe him, deal with your feelings about not having grandkids, and support his choices.

When your 16 year old says this, offer him a ride to soccer practice or whatever else you were planning to do. It shouldn’t even register except to be glad he is sharing how he thinks.

Don't need to do anything. Maybe he is sick of everyone saying when are you going get a girlfriend etc type stuff and wants all pressure off. Or maybe he is simply is not interested. Could be a not interested - yet, or maybe he never will be. He will be who he is.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you nuts? He's 16! He has no idea how he'll feel when he's 25. The proper response is whatever your variation is of "that's nice, dear."

This. You might want to go to therapy is you are bothered by an immature 16 year old trying to be edgy OP.

+1 Have you never been around teenage boys? They will say anything, particularly to get a rise out of an incompetent parent.

Pffft. Please. To a 16 year old- all parents are incompetent. Even you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you nuts? He's 16! He has no idea how he'll feel when he's 25. The proper response is whatever your variation is of "that's nice, dear."

This. You might want to go to therapy is you are bothered by an immature 16 year old trying to be edgy OP.

+1 Have you never been around teenage boys? They will say anything, particularly to get a rise out of an incompetent parent.

Hah yeah, my brother would say stuff like this to get a rise out of my mom. He definitely said he would never marry or have kids. Now he's been married for 15 years and has three kids, and more like the Dad from Bluey in terms of playfulness and involvement with the kids.

Why do you find it deeply disturbing?

There are two issues here. The first is that you think a 16 year old declares something to be true and you think this can never change. At the very least, your thinking will cause friction during the next few years while finding a college and your kid thinks about majors.

The second issue is that you find his current choice to not get in a relationship alarming. You have very limited time left before your child leaves. Right now, you are acting like the kind of parent who will not transition to a good adult relationship with your child. That's what you should find alarming.

Don’t take the bait OP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you nuts? He's 16! He has no idea how he'll feel when he's 25. The proper response is whatever your variation is of "that's nice, dear."

This. You might want to go to therapy is you are bothered by an immature 16 year old trying to be edgy OP.

+1 Have you never been around teenage boys? They will say anything, particularly to get a rise out of an incompetent parent.

Anonymous wrote:Are you nuts? He's 16! He has no idea how he'll feel when he's 25. The proper response is whatever your variation is of "that's nice, dear."

This. You might want to go to therapy is you are bothered by an immature 16 year old trying to be edgy OP.

Maybe he’s gay?

Are you nuts? He's 16! He has no idea how he'll feel when he's 25. The proper response is whatever your variation is of "that's nice, dear."

Deeply disturbing. Well, time to get him some space in the garage so he can have a quiet place to start dissecting animals.

Chill the f out. Also you need therapy with your spouse asap.

He's 16 OP. Some boys are really immature at that age. He may just want you to stop harassing him.

DS (16) has recently expressed that he doesn’t want to ever get in a relationship or get married. This is deeply disturbing. Should I put him in therapy?